Treating Others with Consideration

Grace to You.org ^ | 1993 | John MacArthur, Grace Community Church

[metmom]

"[Love] does not act unbecomingly" (1 Cor. 13:5).

Considerate behavior demonstrates godly love and adds credibility to your witness.

When I was a young child, I loved to slurp my soup. I didn't see any harm in it even though my parents constantly objected. Then one evening I ate with someone who slurped his soup. He was having a great time but I didn't enjoy my meal very much. Then I realized that proper table manners are one way of showing consideration for others. It says, "I care about you and don't want to do anything that might disrupt your enjoyment of this meal."

On a more serious note, I know a couple who got an annulment on the grounds that the husband was rude to his wife. She claimed that his incessant burping proved that he didn't really love her. The judge ruled in her favor, stating that if the husband truly loved her, he would have been more considerate. That's a strange story but true, and it illustrates the point that love is not rude.

"Unbecomingly" in 1 Corinthians 13:5 includes any behavior that violates acceptable biblical or social standards. We could paraphrase it, "Love is considerate of others." That would have been in stark contrast to the inconsiderate behavior of the Corinthians—many of whom were overindulging at their love feasts and getting drunk on the Communion wine (1 Cor. 11:20-22). Some women were overstepping bounds by removing their veils and usurping the role of men in the church (1 Cor. 11:3-16; 14:34-35). Both men and women were corrupting the worship services by trying to outdo one another's spiritual gifts (1 Cor. 14:26).

Undoubtedly the Corinthians justified their rude behavior—just as we often justify ours. But rudeness betrays a lack of love and is always detrimental to effective ministry. For example, I've seen Christians behave so rudely toward non-Christians who smoke that they destroyed any opportunity to tell them about Christ.

Be aware of how you treat others—whether believers or unbelievers. Even the smallest of courtesies can make a profound impression.

Suggestions for Prayer

Ask the Holy Spirit to monitor your behavior and convict you of any loveless actions. As He does, be sure to confess and forsake them.

For Further Study

Read Luke 7:36-50. How did Jesus protect the repentant woman from the Pharisee's rudeness?

[metmom]

Studying God’s Word ping

[Tax-chick]

What a good article! I live in hope that someday my family members will wake up and realize the point of all my lectures about being considerate of others, making an extra effort to show respect, holding oneself to a high standard of decency, and so on.

There’s enough unavoidable entropy out there without our throwing ourselves down the slide, so to speak.

[metmom]

One of the problems I have seen in the church, and this is taught from a very early age, even in the nursery, is that someone will act rudely or in an unloving way, and the person on the receiving end reacts to that.

And what happens is the person reacting to the rudeness is virtually always chastised for being unloving and unforgiving, making them the bad guy and the person who initiated it, did the wrong, is NEVER called on the carpet for it, but rather portrayed as the victim.

Two examples.....

One is that in the boys class one night, some other kid picked up my son’s Bible and started rifling through it. My son objected and the teacher chastised him for not *sharing*. * (Name), you need to learn to share.* Not a word to the kid who wrongly helped himself to someone else’s property.

Well, I’m sorry, but learning to share is not forced. The first kid had no business going into someone else’s property without their permission. But was he chastised? No.

Another was that one 2 year old was sitting quietly playing with a toy, minding his own business, when his brother came along and grabbed it and yanked it out of his grip. He started crying and his mother laid into that poor kid, yelling and screaming at him that he needed to learn to share. And then the brother went away with a smirk on his face, and got what he wanted and nobody said a word to him about being greedy or rude.

So often, the wrong people are blamed and held accountable.

[Tax-chick]

Those are very good points. I often have situations that are hard to mediate. Yes, Sally shouldn’t have eaten two of Tom’s Oreos, but no, Tom shouldn’t have had a screaming tantrum over it, he’s 20 years old, for Pete’s sake. And the same with the younger ones, “Kathleen took a Lego piece from me!” “You’re supposed to be doing math, not playing with Lego!”

I sometimes long for the Global Economic Collapse, so that all family members are equally destitute of everything!

[metmom]

I finally laid down the law that if someone is quietly playing by themselves, ASK before interrupting them. And if they don’t want to play, find something else to do.

In nursery once some 2 year old girl was demanding the toy someone else had, saying, *He’s not sharing*.

I told her that she didn’t need it right away she had a whole nursery full of toys to choose from. When he was done, she could have it. The way that kid glared at me was SOOO telling. I called her bluff.

So when he was done, I told her. and guess what? She wasn’t interested after all.

It was then that I realized that she wasn’t really interested in the toy after all, all she wanted to do was cause trouble.

We’re creating monsters in not teaching kids the right way to share.

Sometimes sharing means leaving other people alone and giving them their space. NOT making them give you what you want. NOW!

I agree. Too much time on our hands. Kids would be better off working hard and wearing themselves out. Then they’d be too tired to fight over nonsense.

[Tax-chick]

I agree: a lot of times, children just want to cause a disturbance, because that’s more fun for them than playing with anything, even the one thing they insist they need. Original sin!

[left that other site]

I see that type of thing ALL the time, especially in the political realm.