Posted on 10/07/2015 7:26:27 AM PDT by Salvation
One of the questionable, and unfortunately common, forms of moral reasoning today is the rather narcissistic notion that God wants each of us to be happy. Sometimes it is put in the form of a rhetorical question: God wants me to be happy, doesn’t He?
And this sort of reasoning (if you want to call it that) is used to justify just about anything. Thus, in pondering divorce, a spouse might point to his or her misery and conclude that God would approve of the split because God wants me to be happy, doesn’t He? Many seek to justify so-called same-sex marriage, and other illicit sexual notions in the same way.
Further, other responsibilities are often blithely set aside as too demanding, under the pretext that God would not make difficult demands because, after all, He wants me to be happy. Since getting to Mass is difficult for me, God will understand if I don’t go; He wants me to be happy, not burdened. Forgiving someone is hard and God does not ask hard things of us; He wants me to be happy. Refusing to cooperate with some evil at work would risk my income; surely God would not demand that I withstand it since He wants me to be happy, content, and financially secure.
The notion that God wants me to be happy thus becomes a kind of trump card, some sort of definitive declaration that obviates the need for any further moral reflection. Practically speaking, this means that I am now free to do as I please. Since I am happy, God is happy, and this is His will … or so the thinking goes.
There are, of course, multiple problems with the “God wants me to be happy” moral stance. In the first place, happiness is a complex matter that admits of many subjective criteria including personal development, temporal dimensions, and worldview. For example, a spiritually mature person can find happiness simply in knowing that he is pleasing God by follow His Commandments. On an interpersonal level, many are happy to make sacrifices for the people they love. To others who are less mature, even the smallest sacrifice can seem obnoxious and bring on unhappiness; pleasing God is not even on their radar, let alone something that would make them happy.
Happiness is also temporally variable. Most of us are well aware that happiness tomorrow is often contingent upon making certain sacrifices today. For example, the happiness one gets in taking a vacation is usually dependent upon having saved up some money beforehand. Making sacrifices today enables happiness tomorrow. If all I do is please myself in the moment, insist on being happy right now, my ability to be happy in the future will likely be seriously compromised. Setting no limits today might mean that I am broke tomorrow, or addicted, or unhealthily overweight, or afflicted with a sexually-transmitted disease. True, lasting, deep happiness in the future often requires some sacrifice today, some capacity to say “No” right now. Without any consideration of the future or of eternal life, “happiness” in the moment is vague, foolish, and meaningless, if not outright destructive. God desires our happiness, all right, but the happiness He wants for us is that of eternal life with Him forever. He has clearly indicated that this will often involve forsaking many of the passing pleasures and the “happiness” of this world.
More troubling still is the self-referential and narcissistic aspect contained in the simple little word “me.” God wants me to be happy.
Those who expresses this “me” notion might be surprised to discover that God has bigger things in mind. God actually cares about other people, too! He also cares about future generations and about the common good. Yes, there’s just a little more on God’s radar than you.
So the divorced man who might say, “God wants me to be happy” should consider that God might actually care about his children too; He might care about the culture that suffers due to rampant divorce; He might care about future generations that would inherit a culture shredded by destroyed families.
Wow, God might actually want others to be happy besides me! Even more shockingly, God might want me to sacrifice my happiness for them! He might actually want me to consider them and even regard them as more important that I am.
As a moral reference point, “me” is remarkably narrow and usually self-serving. And yet many today use this almost reflexively and authoritatively. “God wants me to be happy, so all discussions and further deliberations are over. God has spoken through my desires. He wants me to be happy. Who are you to dispute that? We’re done here; I will not be judged by you.”
“God wants me to be happy” is not a legitimate moral principle. It bespeaks a narcissism that is, sadly, too common today. Call it “Stuart Smalley theology.” You don’t know who Stuart Smalley is? This video shows it plainly enough. The bottom line is, don’t be Stuart Smalley.
...“God wants me to be happy” is not a legitimate moral principle. It bespeaks a narcissism that is, sadly, too common today.
In the comments:
Msgr. Charles Pope says:
Note to Readers – This critique of the “God wants me to be happy” movement is not set forth by me as an absolute refutation of happiness as a goal or of what St. Thomas calls “Beatitude” The pursuit of happiness is a universal human quest. But there is such a thing as true happiness offered by God and the false notions of the world which amounts fundamentally to a rejection of the cross and the summons to truth. The more obnoxious aspect of course is that God wants ME to be happy. “ME” being grasped in isolation to anyone or anything else.
Monsignor Pope Ping!
They are not necessarily mutually exclusive, but they do not mean the same thing.
This one s backwards.
The topic is selfishness, not happiness.
God does want us to be happy. And joyful.
Being happy has nothing to do with fulfilling selfish desires.
No.
God wants me to be holy. Happiness, or joy, may well follow from that. But the goal is eternal joy with God in Heaven, not earthly happiness.
The Joel Olsteen syndrome and the prosperity gospel.
Your "happy" is self gratification. You really think that's what life is about?
Two things:
The words, ‘pursuit of happiness’, does not have ‘an end clause’, therefore you are always in pursuit, and never at the goal.
The ‘G_d wants me happy’ theorem was really poured out upon the people by the Pentecostal movement, starting in the 1980’s, as witnessed by myself, in a NY megachurch.
IF, now hear me out, G_d WANTS you to be happy, why would he allow you to bruise your knee, fall on your, ahem, face, lose your job, lose a family member?
IF, you gits ‘unhappy’, in any of that, where are you supposed to go to GIT happy?
IF, you know that this is an imperfect world, and all of your ventures begin from the word ‘no’, there is not much that can git you down in the dumps and unhappy.
The Apostle Paul lived a very harsh life and paid the ultimate price for it. IMHO he was depressed (the thorn he wished God to remove from him 2 Corinthians 2:12-7-9) for most of his ministry.
This world is not about our happiness and it will never be about our happiness.
Jesus should be everybody’s focus—like Peter sinking in the water when he lost focus trying to walk it, once he kept his eyes on Christ he made it.
I’ll be the first to admit I’m a hypocrite trying to do this.
Good Message!
True happiness comes from following God and pleasing Him. Deviancy isn’t pleasing to God.
God never said things wouldn’t be hard. Just the opposite, in fact.
He said that things would be hard if we followed Him, but He promised that He would make sure the burden would not be too much for us to bear. He can’t help us bear the burden, though, if we are too afraid or lazy to pick it up.
“Being happy has nothing to do with fulfilling selfish desires.”
Sure it does, when people are using the pursuit of happiness as their excuse for fulfilling those selfish desires.
God wants us to be obedient, from which flows Joy, not happiness...
Happiness is a moment in time based on emotion...
No wonder liberals are so screwed up....
Yup...spot on...
True.
One key I have found to staving off unhappiness is to remember to be thankful. I’ve found it is nearly impossible to be thankful to God and depressed at the same time. Our brains just can’t juggle both of those things at once!
Here is a good Joel Osteen quote I wrote down that illustrates this nonsense. ‘I want to encourage every one of us to realize when we obey God, we are not doing it for God-I mean that is one way of looking at it-we are doing it for ourselves, because God takes pleasure when we are happy. That is the thing that gives him the greatest joy.
Just do good for yourself. Do good because God wants you to be happy. When you come to church, when you worship him, you are not doing it for God really. Your are doing it for yourself because that is what makes God happy.’ Looks like some scripture twisting to me.
GOD wants us to be OBEDIENT; then we will be happy.
LUKE 11:28
He replied, “Blessed rather are those who hear the word of God and obey it.”
JOHN 8:51
Very truly I tell you, whoever obeys my word will never see death.”
JOHN 14:23
Jesus replied, “Anyone who loves me will obey my teaching. My Father will love them, and we will come to them and make our home with them.
JOHN 15:14
You are my friends if you do what I command.
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