SECRET SERVICE SOFTWARE WILL 'DETECT SARCASM' IN SOCIAL MEDIA USERS

Reuters ^ | June 3 2014 | No Attribution

[MeshugeMikey]

The Secret Service is purchasing software to watch users of social networks in real time, according to contract documents.

In a work order posted on Monday, the agency details information the tool will collect -- ranging from emotions of Internet users to old Twitter messages.

Its capabilities will include “sentiment analysis,”

[MeshugeMikey]

That works wonders for me!!!

In this day and age Sarcasm is My Second Best Friend

[MeshugeMikey]

given that there ae SO MANY of us here employing the same arcane system .....we may be able to overload thier system.....

[Red Badger]

If someone has to tell you they are the ‘best & the brightest’, they most likely aren’t either................

[taildragger]

Oh they won't detect sarcasm from some of us, it will be full blown invective and sardonic. From others is will be Andrew Dice Clay on Steroids...

Seriously what the bleep, why are they not out trying to catch rogue nations doing what ever they do to our currency i.e. fakes, is this a colossal waste of time or what...

[Pollster1]

i sense that they cant find their own rear ends with both hands.... a GPS UNIT,,and a Michelin Guide Book!!

The Secret Service is so inspired by their boss that they mostly find strippers and prostitutes (a coping mechanism for taking a job where they might have to trade their lives for something so worthless?). That works out fine until they refuse to pay and make the front page.

[Pollster1]

going straight for Ridicule

Don't bother with parody. Every time I try to write a parody to show just how inept, absurd, and over the top the White House has become, Obama comes up with something far more absurd than anyone sane could invent.

[Night Hides Not]

Semmens is too good, they’ll never catch him. lol

[I want the USA back]

< /s > No program is capable of detecting irony or sarcasm. Impossible. Won’t happen.
< s >

[Pajamajan]

I was going to say-in an effort to assist the Secret Service in this very important work-Here is the new sarcasm tag (/SS).

[combat_boots]

Mwah ha ha ha

[JPG]

[Alas Babylon!]

Two deranged liberal comments from that Washington Post blog:

Given the number of racist trolls prowling the blogosphere, the Secret Service must be legitimately concerned about which gun-wielding Republican crazies are actually a threat to the POTUS. Having software which distinguishes the more intelligent people who mock them from the dim-witted crazies themselves would certainly be useful, if it's possible. But the software would have to be smarter than most people.

The real purpose of this is so they can automate the process of finding the people that are using "social media" as a means of fomenting a possible rebellion.

I wonder what these Leftists will think when or if it's ever used against THEM?

[SoFloFreeper]

#SarcasmTHISSecretService

[Starstruck]

Vercotti: Doug (takes a drink) I was terrified of him. Everyone was terrified of Doug. I've seen grown men pull their own heads off rather than see Doug. Even Dinsdale was frightened of Doug. Interviewer: What did he do? Vercotti: He used sarcasm. He knew all the tricks, dramatic irony, metaphor, pathos, puns, parody, litotes and satire.

Love that. What is it from?

[Billthedrill]

What is it from?

Monty Python's "Piranha Brothers" sketch:

Part 1

Part II

DINSDALE!!!!

[dfwgator]

Monty Python - The Piranha Brothers

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nhV856sXf3w

[thesearethetimes...]

No “when” my FRiend. If they read history, they would know that hard truth : /

May God guide our course.
Tatt

[infowarrior]

i sense that they cant find their own rear ends with both hands.... a GPS UNIT,,and a Michelin Guide Book!!

You forgot the map, compass, and seeing-eye-dog...

the infowarrior

[Starstruck]

Monty Python - The Piranha Brothers

Great stuff. I love the English humour. Python, Black Adder, Laurie and Frye, Wooster and Jeeves etc. but for some reason my ear to brain has trouble with the dialect.

[july4thfreedomfoundation]

Why doesn’t the Secret Service get it’s own damn house in order instead of messing with the rights of the American people?

First there were the SS agents in Cartagena sleeping with whores, and fighting with them when they refuse to pay the agreed upon price the next morning. Then, there was the other SS agent passed out on his ass drunk in the hallway in a hotel in The Netherlands when he was supposed to be protecting Obama. And these are just a few cases that were made public.

Instead, they want to mess with the First Amendment rights of the American people? Shame on them.