Posted on 03/19/2014 9:07:57 PM PDT by slumber1
The Army private who was tried and convicted as Bradley Edward Manning for leaking U.S. secrets to WikiLeaks is petitioning a Kansas court for a name change, to Chelsea Elizabeth Manning.
(Excerpt) Read more at dallasnews.com ...
Maybe he/she/it will wind up dating Chaz Bono.
Already taken.
In 2022, he could be Chelsea Clinton’s running mate (after 8 years of Hillary Haggard Clinton). Chelsea-Chelsea 2022...
Somebody should busta cap in that sicko’s bottom, but he’d probably like that.
That quote was running in my head when I read the article.
Hopefully the third date will not inspire a video, or the Internet is likely to implode.
“Chelsea Hubbell” is already taken....
Changing to what..Chelsea N. Mourning? Yeah, that’s discreet and inconspicuous enough.
Prissy little traitor.
Is that one of those ‘Self Made Women’ who demand to use any public bathroom they please?
Chelsea Clinton?
NURSE
Mrs... Garrison?
MRS. GARRISON
Oh, that’s me.
[Planned Parenthood OR.]
MRS. GARRISON
Hello doctor, looks like I need an abortion.
DOCTOR
...an abortion?
MRS. GARRISON
Yeah, I’ve got one growing inside me.
Now, are you gonna scramble its brains
or just vacuum it out? ...If you want
you can just scramble it and I’ll queef
it out myself.
DOCTOR
Mmister Garrison-
MRS. GARRISON
Mrs. Garrison.
DOCTOR
Mmrs. Garrison, you can’t have an abortion.
MRS. GARRISON
Don’t you tell me what I can and can’t
do with my body! A woman has a right
to choose!
DOCTOR
No, I mean you’re physically unable
to have an abortion, because you can’t
get pergnant.
MRS. GARRISON
But I missed my period.
DOCTOR
You can’t have periods either. You
had a sex change, Mr. Garrison, but
you don’t have ovaries or a womb. You
don’t produce eggs.
MRS. GARRISON
You mean, I’ll never know what it feels
like to have a baby growing inside me
and then scramble its brains and vacuum
it out?
DOCTOR
N-that’s right.
MRS. GARRISON
But I paid five thousand dollars to
be a woman. This would mean I I’m not
really a woman. Ih, I’m just a... a
I’m just a guy with a mutilated penis!
DOCTOR
Basically, yes.
MRS. GARRISON
...Oh boy, do I feel like a jackass.
“If he changes his name to Tinkerbell hell be able to fly.”
He has probably been doing that for years.
CHELSEA MANNING
Tune: “Chelsea Morning”
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FOkxuuQOmRg
Woke up, and I was Chelsea Manning
And the first thing that I said
Was I wanted to be female
And wear wigs upon my head
If you think you’d like to buy me bras
And wrap them up, I take A-cup
Oh, don’t you guess
I’ll put on a dress
And I’ll wear a bunch of make-up
Woke up, and I was Chelsea Manning
And the first thing that I saw
Was a thirty-five-year sentence
And no rainbow on the wall
All those big strong men to welcome me
Criminals can be so hardened
O, won’t you please
I’m on my knees
Give this little girl a pardon
Now the cell door opens on my new friends for the day
And the hall is filled, they form a line
And two’d be fine
But look, there’s nine
Whistles to blow today
Woke up, and I was Chelsea Manning
And the first thing that I know
That I now realize I’m lesbian
I should go where women go
And I don’t like this place that I’m in
So stick me with some hormones
Oh, let me stay
Where I’ll be okay
And we’ll talk in diff’rent pronouns
When the cell door closes
And the rainbows all recede
I will tell you secrets
Hear me speak
The stuff you seek
Is what I’ll leak
The only thing I need
Pretty badly, I’m not
Bradley, now I’m Chelsea Manning
And why should we give a rats ass?
Should be charged again for fraudulent enlistment.
That YouTube link is no longer working.
First of all, I was really drunk and she was wearing a Halloween costume.
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