I would not give to one of my three nieces for that reason. I only give when I know the reason, and the person, well enough to know that it won’t be misused. And, as I said, we’re not talking large amounts of money. This is usually enough to get groceries, or pay a utility bill. If in doubt, and there are small children involved, my husband and I will discuss the matter, and make a check directly to the utility or the landlord.
I’m not chastising you. I think that “tiding people over” contributes to the overall problem. People will avoid the hard task of budgeting or “doing the right thing” as long as they can get over the next hump.
An example: We had a single mom get in trouble with bills and people took up money for her. Her employment situation worsened so someone asked “Do you have family that can help you?”. Her answer was “I’m not speaking to my family”. Her pride separated her from her family. As long as she was able to get help from others, she didn’t see the need to fix the relationship and we were feeding that problem.
I know a man that is in the payday lending loop. His whole disability check goes to payday lenders. We discussed paying them off but we were convinced he would get right back into trouble. His problem isn’t payday lending. It’s the inability to budget his money. Dave Ramsey says that he always ties money given to the recipient doing a budget. He pays them to do a budget. Great idea.