The sad and curious exile of the American mustache

Boston Globe ^ | October 11, 2009 | Wesley Morris

[GQuagmire]

...What happened? For the past 20 years, a parade of facial hair has taken root on the faces of movie stars and American men - sideburns, the three-day beard, the chinstrap, the soul patch. The goatee returned from the 19th century and seemingly brought eight cousins with it. But the mustache? As far as pop culture is concerned, the mustache remains trapped in the land of porn and irony.

[GQuagmire]

I'm a proud wearer of a goatee for the last fifteen years. Recently I went a mustache only.. for about 5 minutes. It looked ridiculous. Shaved everything and three days later...goatee was back.

[Borges]

[Yossarian]

Once it was done by Tom Selleck, it just couldn't be topped.

It was kind of like being the first to reach the North Pole. After it's been done, what's the point in following up?

[clintonh8r]

Goatees were great back when you started yours...the sign of a non-conformist, and slightly dangerous. Now every other guy seems to have one.

[jessduntno]

A REAL mustache. Remember?

http://i23.photobucket.com/albums/b389/johnnybluejeans500/FINGERS85LEAF.jpg

[GQuagmire]

Not to mention that it has more grey than brown in it....

[grey_whiskers]

I believe *thud* is the appropriate comment from female FReepers in this case?

I know my wife still reacts this way to him.

Cheers!

[buccaneer81]

I hear they're making a comeback...

[clintonh8r]

I have a dear old friend (for more than 50 years!) who is the leading indicator of the death of a fashion trend. He’s always been the last to adopt.....Italian horn necklace, gold chain, sideburns, mullett, tattoo, etc....and about six months ago: shaved head and goatee. Over! (I hope he starts wearing mansandals soon!)

[Clemenza]

THIS is a mustache!:

[clintonh8r]

I forgot to mention his ponytail...

[GQuagmire]

I hope that’s not a photo of you.....

[Clemenza]

I had a 'stache a la Father Guido Sarducci when I was 18, which I grew into a full goatee a year later.

I have always had a leather jacket, but never went all the way with the eagle cap...

[GQuagmire]

Hey, I like the mansandals. Keeps the feet aired out.

[Squantos]

Wow !!!

There’s a nightmare....

[Clemenza]

I haven’t seen a “guinea horn” outside of the Sicillian-American mileau.

[Mmogamer]

I’ve had a mustache since highschool.. shaved it off twice.
Look really odd without it so..

[EricT.]

I’ve switched between a full beard and a goatee on and off for the last 10 years, but only because I hate shaving— especially upper lip and chin.

[I see my hands]

[GeorgiaDawg32]

I’ve had a mustache since I was 18..cut it off once when I was 20, immediately grew it back and it’s been with me ever since..

I tried a goatee, but the growth pattern on the right side of my face means half of it grows straight down (left), the other half makes an immediate right turn towards my ear (right). Unless I keep it super short, it looks ridiculous..

[JLS]

Replaced by tats and piercings in modern pop culture.

[cripplecreek]

Mine came off once when I tried trimming it short and decided the Adolph look wasn’t for me.

[sionnsar]

I had one like that. But moustache wax wouldn’t hold it well. Now I have one similar (not as extreme), but with full beard.

[Eagle Eye]

Wore a mustache pretty much since high school. Grew my goatee in 2003 when working in the mideast to as my “I’m not a soldier” look.

[GQuagmire]

Replaced by tats and piercings in modern pop culture.

At least if my goatee goes out of style, I can shave it off. Unlike these idiots who get tattooes on their necks, forearms etc. who are stuck with them forever(or spend huge dollars to get them removed)

[Interesting Times]

This guy is a good enough writer to try some real topics...

[Psycho_Bunny]

"The mustache survived Hitler. "

The author's a moron. The way Hitler wore his retardostache did not survive.

[GQuagmire]

It is the Boston Globe. I’m surprised he didn’t blame Evil Republicans for the demise of the mustache....

[cripplecreek]

The way Hitler wore his retardostache did not survive.

LOL it accidental and only lasted about 3 minutes for me.

[wbarmy]

Real testosterone means a real beard, all the way around from the Adam’s apple to about an inch (give or take a few centimeters) under the yes. Anything else is a wanna-be.

[wbarmy]

(give or take a few centimeters) under the yes.

Eyes - eyes - even my wife just gave me grief for the post.

[cripplecreek]

(or spend huge dollars to get them removed)

About 100 dollars per square inch, per laser session. It often takes two or three sessions so you're looking at 300 bucks per session.

[SatinDoll]

Did you know that psychological testing of both sexes has proven that the majority of people do not trust a man with a beard?

And worse, when women get together they universally agree that men should not grow out their facial hair. Women rarely say anything about their preference for smooth faces on men for fear of rejection. The only ones who don’t care or prefer beards/mustaches are women who don’t want sexual activity. Who really wants to kiss a haribrush?

[Bad Jack Bauer]

I have worn a mustache since I got out of high school. Tom Sellecklike before and after the Army. In the Army I shaved it for eight weeks in basic then let it grow back once I got to Ft. Gordon. I kept it trimmed short in the service and grew it to rival Tom Selleck’s after I got out. Only difference now and when I first grew it is that now it is peppered with a bit of grey.

[JLS]

Exactly which is why I was happy my daughter got a belly-button pierce that closed up for her rather than a tat that is forever but gets worse looking with fading and sagging.

[Candor7]

Mustaches do NOT fit into the current popular gurly-man male image.

Of course the former mustache riders still protest.

Today only hirsute women have mustaches,men are not supposed to.. Generally women of Spanish, Italian or ME extraction. I think they can be kinda cute, but whadda I know?

[JRandomFreeper]

Did you know that psychological testing of both sexes has proven that the majority of people do not trust a man with a beard?

That's ok. I don't trust a majority of the people, of either gender. Seems fair enough.

/johnny

[Pusterfuss]

[GQuagmire]

[Tax-chick]

Thud.

And he’s holding up mighty well for 60-ish, too. I always say that the right kind of men get better as they get older!

[Tax-chick]

“Mujer con bigote no necesita dote” is a Spanish proverb. It means, “A woman with a mustache doesn’t need a dowry,” which I think implies that the higher testosterone levels indicated by the mustache means the husband will be “taken care of” in non-monetary ways.

[School of Rational Thought]

After various beards, goatees, van dykes, mustaches, I have decided to go with the double chin.

[GQuagmire]

“A woman with a mustache doesn’t need a dowry,”

Says to me she won't be getting married due to the aforemention facial hair....

[JRandomFreeper]

Frieda was weird. Cool, but weird.

/johnny

[Tax-chick]

she won't be getting married due to the aforemention facial hair

That would mean a *lot* of single women (and men) in Mediterranean countries.

[Genflag]

I have one of those, but with mutton chops. I haven’t trimmed my ‘stache since december of last year, and if I don’t trim my chops about once a months I look like I should be in a BBC production of A Christmas Carol.

[School of Rational Thought]

Frida Kahlo? Mexican

[southernnorthcarolina]

Beginning with Lincoln, who began growing a beard after his 1860 election and before his inauguration, through William Howard Taft's term, all Presidents save Andrew Johnson had facial hair of some sort. Taft, elected in 1908, was the last.

Thomas Dewey, GOP nominee in 1944 and 1948, attempted to bring the trend back. But once Alice Roosevelt Longworth (TR's daughter and socialite) referred to Dewey as "that little man on top of a wedding cake," it was pretty much over for mustaches, at least at the Presidential level.

[jessduntno]

"I have one of those, but with mutton chops. I haven’t trimmed my ‘stache since december of last year, and if I don’t trim my chops about once a months."

You should head to Gettysburg to be a re-enactor...

[240B]

Ft. Gordon? That’s a 25mos.

From flag and torch in the civil war to signal satellites above...