Free Republic
Browse · Search
News/Activism
Topics · Post Article

Skip to comments.

What's in the back of your pickup?
News-Miner ^ | February 24, 2006 | TIM MOWRY

Posted on 02/24/2006 6:40:07 PM PST by george76

Edited on 02/24/2006 6:43:51 PM PST by Admin Moderator. [history]

You can tell a lot about a person by what he or she carries around in the back of the pickup truck during the eight months it's not summer in Alaska.

The battered bed of my 1995 Ford 150 contains essential survival gear, in addition to the usual assortment of Alaskan accouterments.

The first thing every Alaskan should have in the back of their pickup truck is a large pile of firewood.

Firewood has several important uses. For one thing, it serves as a weight in the back of the truck to improve traction in slippery driving conditions. Some people put sandbags in the back of their pickup trucks for weight but I prefer firewood because I've never had much luck burning sand.

That brings me to the second use for firewood. You can burn it, assuming you have an ax to split it, which you should because if you're like me and you put the greenest, heaviest birch logs you can find in the back of your pickup truck, it will definitely need to be split to burn.

Even then, you'll probably need some help getting the fire started, which is why I always carry a red plastic jug of gasoline and a case of HEET in the back of my pickup truck.

While the jug of gasoline also comes in handy in the event I run out of gas and the HEET can be used to eliminate water in your gas line, their primary function is to start fires.

You'll never know when you'll need to build a fire in Alaska so it's always a good idea to have a good supply of wood and firestarter on hand.

While firewood is important, a good shovel may be the single most important piece of equipment you can have in the back of your pickup truck. Not only can you use the shovel to dig yourself--or somebody else--out of a snowbank in the unfortunate event you find yourself--or somebody else--buried in one, you can also use the shovel to find the rest of the stuff in the back of your pickup truck, most of which is buried under snow or is frozen in the glacier that has formed in the bed of your pickup truck as a result of hauling around leaky water jugs.

This is where you will invariably find important items like the jack, tire iron, jumper cables, tow rope and extension cord, all of which are considered mandatory gear in the back of any Alaskan's pickup truck, even though you hope you never have to use them because they are imbedded in 2 feet of ice.

In the unfortunate event you do need to chip something out of the ice, the ax that you use to split your firewood will come in handy for this purpose, too. A word of caution, though. Be careful not to hack through your extension cord or jumper cables.

There's a good chance your spare tire will also be imbedded in ice because, if you're like me, you neglected to put it under the truck where it's supposed to go back when winter started. Caution should also be used in the event you need to chip your spare tire out of the ice; a flat spare tire is about as useful as a pair of jumper cables that have been cut in half.

There is also a bag of kitty litter in the back of my pickup truck. Lots of people keep bags of kitty litter in the back of their trucks in the event they get stuck. The kitty litter serves as traction on ice, as well as weight in the back of the truck.

That's not necessarily the case in my situation. The kitty litter sitting in the back of my truck was in a garbage bag waiting to be dropped off at the Dumpster when my neighbor's dog jumped in the back of the truck, tore through the garbage and left a pile of used kitty litter on the glacier in the bottom of my truck. It now resembles glacial moraine.

Most people, me included, have a couple of bags of garbage tossed in the back of their trucks. The only real purpose the garbage bags serve is to attract ravens, but any real Alaskan will tell you you're not a real Alaskan if you don't have ravens tearing apart garbage bags in the back of your pickup truck while it sits in a parking lot.

Another thing everyone should have in the back of their truck is survival food. I usually keep a couple of frozen Tony's pizzas in the back of my truck, along with a few whole frozen chickens, but that's mostly because I don't have room in the freezer.

In the unfortunate event you get stuck somewhere and need to cook them, you can either douse them with gasoline or HEET and light them until they've thawed enough to eat or cook them over an open fire you build with the firewood in the back of your truck.

The last, and perhaps most important, item I carry in the back of my pickup truck is a pair of cross-country skis.

The skis serve a couple of purposes. First, they make me look like the jock I'm not. Driving around town with a pair of skis in the back of your pickup truck gives people the impression you actually ski even if you don't.

More importantly, though, the skis serve as a last resort in the unfortunate event I get a flat tire and pop my spare tire trying to chip it out of the ice with my ax or I leave my lights on and run down my battery before chopping through my jumper cables trying to chip them out of the ice.

If that happens, I can just click on my skis and ski home.

Of course, to do that I'd have to find my ski boots, which is where a good shovel comes in.


TOPICS: Political Humor/Cartoons
KEYWORDS: chevrolet; chevy; dodge; ford; gmc; hummer; nissan; pickemuptruck; pickup; pickuptruck; sut; suv; suvs; toyota; truck; trucks
Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first 1-2021-4041-6061-80 ... 121-134 next last

1 posted on 02/24/2006 6:40:09 PM PST by george76
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | View Replies]

To: george76

Beer cans?


2 posted on 02/24/2006 6:41:38 PM PST by neodad (USS Vincennes (CG-49) Freedom's Fortress)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: george76

Hockey gear!


3 posted on 02/24/2006 6:42:39 PM PST by airborne
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: george76

The skis serve as a last resort in the unfortunate event I get a flat tire and pop my spare tire trying to chip it out of the ice with my ax or I leave my lights on and run down my battery before chopping through my jumper cables trying to chip them out of the ice.

If that happens, I can just click on my skis and ski home.

Of course, to do that I'd have to find my ski boots, which is where a good shovel comes in.


4 posted on 02/24/2006 6:42:52 PM PST by george76 (Ward Churchill : Fake Indian, Fake Scholarship, and Fake Art)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: george76

You really butchered the excerpting.


5 posted on 02/24/2006 6:43:10 PM PST by 1rudeboy
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: george76

I have two 70 lb sand bags and a 90 lb chunk of alloy steel (rejected part) from work. A rear wheel drive Ranger is a pain in Fargo's six month winter.


6 posted on 02/24/2006 6:43:34 PM PST by GOP_Party_Animal
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: george76

One or two girlfriends?


7 posted on 02/24/2006 6:44:05 PM PST by Izzy Dunne (Hello, I'm a TAGLINE virus. Please help me spread by copying me into YOUR tag line.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: george76

at one point, a pickup I owned (and used regularly) actually had grass growing in the back of it.


8 posted on 02/24/2006 6:44:05 PM PST by the invisib1e hand ("Who is it, really, making up your mind?")
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: george76

It's winter in Idaho...I have five 60lb bags of sand in the back of my 4X4.


9 posted on 02/24/2006 6:44:49 PM PST by Jeff Head (www.dragonsfuryseries.com)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: 1rudeboy

Sorry, I was trying to stay within the 300 words.


10 posted on 02/24/2006 6:45:06 PM PST by george76 (Ward Churchill : Fake Indian, Fake Scholarship, and Fake Art)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 5 | View Replies]

To: george76

the wife. Dog rides in the cab


11 posted on 02/24/2006 6:45:26 PM PST by zeeba neighba (Onward into the fog, dear evolutionaries, there's tapioca just ahead!)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: 1rudeboy

Fixed.


12 posted on 02/24/2006 6:47:24 PM PST by Admin Moderator
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 5 | View Replies]

To: george76

No worries. Nice find.


13 posted on 02/24/2006 6:47:51 PM PST by 1rudeboy
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 10 | View Replies]

To: george76

My old radiator hose. I put it there when I replaced it.

You never know.


14 posted on 02/24/2006 6:48:32 PM PST by Skooz (Chastity prays for me, piety sings............Modesty hides my thighs in her wings......)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Jeff Head
You poor guys.Here in California it is winter also,so I have my smaller sunshade tarp that I attach to my lumber rack to provide relief from the warm sun during lunch.
15 posted on 02/24/2006 6:48:34 PM PST by builder (I don't want a piece of someone else's pie)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 9 | View Replies]

To: Admin Moderator

Thanks.


16 posted on 02/24/2006 6:48:44 PM PST by 1rudeboy
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 12 | View Replies]

To: george76

I don't see this site on the excerpt list, so I reposted the entire article.

http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/1111944/posts


17 posted on 02/24/2006 6:49:00 PM PST by Admin Moderator
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 10 | View Replies]

To: george76

My pickup truck in Miami has:

a couple good size lengths of 3/4 inch rope.
some wood, incl a piece of 4x4 and 2x4
jumper cables
tools (wrenches and things)
a 5 gallon bucket of stuff I forget what most of is.


18 posted on 02/24/2006 6:50:29 PM PST by Sam Cree (absolute reality) - ("Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one." Albert Einstein)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: george76

Maj. T.J. "King" Kong:

Survival kit contents check.

In them you'll find: one .45 caliber automatic; two boxes of ammunition; four days concentrated emergency rations; one drug issue containing: antibiotics, morphine, vitamin pills, pep pills, sleeping pills, tranquilizer pills; one miniature combination Russian phrase book and bible; one hundred dollars in rubles; one hundred dollars in gold; nine packs of chewing gum; one issue of prophylactics; three lipsticks; three pair a nylon stockings.

Shoot, a fellah could have a pretty good weekend in Vegas with all that stuff.


19 posted on 02/24/2006 6:51:02 PM PST by beaver fever
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: george76

Half bag of rained-on horse feed, gas can and jumper cables. Stereotypical Texas truck.


20 posted on 02/24/2006 6:51:55 PM PST by chesty_puller (USMC 70-73 3MAF VN 70-71)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]


Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first 1-2021-4041-6061-80 ... 121-134 next last

Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.

Free Republic
Browse · Search
News/Activism
Topics · Post Article

FreeRepublic, LLC, PO BOX 9771, FRESNO, CA 93794
FreeRepublic.com is powered by software copyright 2000-2008 John Robinson