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Morford: Does 'Narnia' Actually Suck?
San Francisco Chronicle ^ | January 11, 2006 | Mark Morford (stay away from her wardrobe)

Posted on 01/11/2006 8:36:00 AM PST by presidio9

I was all wrong about "Narnia."

Which is to say, about six months ago in this space I was hell-bent on the white-hot idea that Hollywood and the Christian-right group/billionaire that helped produce the tepid and saccharine flick would absolutely ruin "The Chronicles of Narnia" books, ruin the deep magic and the astounding sense of wonder these books held for millions of children (including this writer) by regurgitating them as a slick, dumbed-down, poorly acted smarm-fest full of ham-fisted Jesus allusions and excessive special effects, all from the director who brought you, ahem, "Shrek 2."

Things did not, shall we say, look good.

Truly, I was of the mind that the "Narnia" books, to my dreamy, rose-colored memory, were these insanely rich and ingenious tales, dense and deeply involved anecdotes of children exploring a phenomenally magical world that was so utterly not of this grungy, terrestrial plane it might as well have been Pluto. Like many, my time-addled vision elevated the books to the status of utter genius, largely due to the feeling of unchecked awe I can still recall them providing. And I was absolutely sure Hollywood would rape that memory for all the pseudo-Christian bullcrap and Burger King tie-ins it possibly could.

I was wrong. Sort of. Hollywood didn't actually ruin "Narnia." Hollywood didn't cheapen it all that much, or reduce it down or remove much of the original majesty by injecting it with too much CGI and not enough heart. Rather, Hollywood has done something even more depressing: It's revealed "The Chronicles of Narnia" books to be what they actually are: a rather lean slice of delightfully wrought but fairly simpleminded, largely hobbled fantasy for the imagination-deprived single-digit set.

I have now seen the movie. -snip-

(Excerpt) Read more at sfgate.com ...


TOPICS: Culture/Society; News/Current Events; Politics/Elections
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To: gogeo

> what do you get when you cross a vampire with Liberace?

"I vant to suck your..."

Uhh... wait. Family group. Nevermind.


101 posted on 01/11/2006 11:40:34 AM PST by orionblamblam (A furore Normannorum libra nos, Domine)
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To: presidio9

I can't believe Morford didn't make single Republicans are sex deviants observation. He must be slipping.


102 posted on 01/11/2006 12:04:55 PM PST by Democratshavenobrains
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To: gogeo
Okay, I'll bite...what do you get when you cross a vampire with Liberace?

I don't know, but I am willing to bet that he is interested in sucking more than just your blood...

103 posted on 01/11/2006 12:12:32 PM PST by Crusher138 (Homeless and jobless. Here's to a better 2006!)
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To: presidio9

Only in his fondest dreams.


104 posted on 01/11/2006 5:03:47 PM PST by SmithL (Jerusalem, Jerusalem, Lift up your gates and sing, Hosana in the highest! Hosana to your King!)
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To: presidio9

"Chronic--ill-ess" as near as I can figger out.


105 posted on 01/16/2006 7:19:07 PM PST by BradyLS (DO NOT FEED THE BEARS!)
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