BAKER'S DOZEN!
Posted on 01/11/2006 8:36:00 AM PST by presidio9
I was all wrong about "Narnia."
Which is to say, about six months ago in this space I was hell-bent on the white-hot idea that Hollywood and the Christian-right group/billionaire that helped produce the tepid and saccharine flick would absolutely ruin "The Chronicles of Narnia" books, ruin the deep magic and the astounding sense of wonder these books held for millions of children (including this writer) by regurgitating them as a slick, dumbed-down, poorly acted smarm-fest full of ham-fisted Jesus allusions and excessive special effects, all from the director who brought you, ahem, "Shrek 2."
Things did not, shall we say, look good.
Truly, I was of the mind that the "Narnia" books, to my dreamy, rose-colored memory, were these insanely rich and ingenious tales, dense and deeply involved anecdotes of children exploring a phenomenally magical world that was so utterly not of this grungy, terrestrial plane it might as well have been Pluto. Like many, my time-addled vision elevated the books to the status of utter genius, largely due to the feeling of unchecked awe I can still recall them providing. And I was absolutely sure Hollywood would rape that memory for all the pseudo-Christian bullcrap and Burger King tie-ins it possibly could.
I was wrong. Sort of. Hollywood didn't actually ruin "Narnia." Hollywood didn't cheapen it all that much, or reduce it down or remove much of the original majesty by injecting it with too much CGI and not enough heart. Rather, Hollywood has done something even more depressing: It's revealed "The Chronicles of Narnia" books to be what they actually are: a rather lean slice of delightfully wrought but fairly simpleminded, largely hobbled fantasy for the imagination-deprived single-digit set.
I have now seen the movie. -snip-
(Excerpt) Read more at sfgate.com ...
C.S. Lewis was a genius and Narnia was excellent. Morford on the other hand obviously doesn't like anything that doesn't contain the vapidness and degredation of an average Maureen Dowd article.
Regards, Ivan
ping
He loved Narnia as a kid. Upon seeing the movie and re-checking the books, he has decided that Narnia sucks. It's childish. It's Christian. Only a naive little child would tolerate such childish tripe. He is beyond that now. The only good thing about the movie was the portrayal of Evil. He found that quite attracttive.
Do you mean the CHRONIC-what?-el of Narnia?
Yuh know, Ms./It Morford. please keep what you suck to yourself, ok.
I saw it. I liked it...
No. (But it's certain that his boyfriend does.)
Oh sure, the books are still packed with annoying Christian allegory,
And THAT, my FRiends, is why the story so thoroughly irritates, annoys, and infuriates Miss Morford.
I actually re-read the series a short time ago. I bought them for my Goddaughter, and I read her a couple of chapters a night for a month or so. Having recently heard the crys from the left that they were Christian propaganda (and having read them as a kid without realizing this), I was amazed at how well-written they are. There is tons of Christian symbolism that goes right over your head (and obviously any 8 year-old's head) unless you are specifically looking for it.
Weird but funny.
CS Lewis was a friend of Tolkien. Morford is a friend of Dorothy.
I gotta have a cupcake!
Memo to Ms. Morford:
The books haven't changed. You have. You have become deaf to the subtleties and nuances which are there, because they are different than the cookie-cutter and ham-fisted agendae which you mistake for being subtle and unique because they are rejected by decent people. You, Ms. Morford, are precisely the sort of person who runs the "new schools" that tyrranized poor Jill.
"There once was a (ahem) boy, named Morford, and he just about deserved it."
Thought it was a good movie! Good fairy tale even for adults. May I admit to a few tears when Aslan was being tortured enroute to his crucifixion...err, I mean, death.
Theater was filled, too.
That's one of the blessings of the net, you don't have to actually watch Saturday Night Live to catch maybe one good skits every seven shows. They eventually make it out here.
>> He loved Narnia as a kid. Upon seeing the movie and re-checking the books, he has decided that Narnia sucks. It's childish. It's Christian. Only a naive little child would tolerate such childish tripe. He is beyond that now. The only good thing about the movie was the portrayal of Evil. He found that quite attracttive. <<
You do quite an excellent job at making him sound like Eustace Scrubb's parents.
He's just upset that there were no gay sheepherders in Narnia.
No, Narnia doesn't suck.
But the fudge packing, bare backing, bug chasing Ms. Morford does.
Well, he probably went to one of those progressive schools that Eustace went to.
Deinitely one of the better SNL routines of late...
Yep.
Something about "the world" hating the Holy Spirit.
He probably didn't like it because it had no homosexual cowboys.
My experience was similar. And I am recommending this movie to everyone! Went to a 16 screen multi-plex. Narnia was showing in two of the theaters...and each one was packed and sold out...the other 14 were not.
"a rather lean slice of delightfully wrought but fairly simpleminded, largely hobbled fantasy for the imagination-deprived single-digit set."
Nice, very nice.
Can't argue on substance, so she attacks witrh insult.
I actually didn't like the movie that much. Not sure what it was, but the characters just felt flat. Except for the White Queen having fits of PMS, she seemed as scarey as kindergarden teacher.
When you compare books that I loved when I was younger(TLTWATW and LOTRs) I very much liked the LOTRs movies and felt more of a 'meh' towards Narnia.
Estauce's parents were vegans teetollers who didn't smoke, so the smiliarity ends there. However, I'm sure that Morford does wear a special kind of underwear, but I don't want to know about it.
In more than one way.
"Chronicles of Narnia" has made tons of $$$.
It has stayed at, or near the top, of the box office for weeks now.
"Syriana", on the other hand, has tanked.
Just a simple FYI
Interesting. I HATED the LOTR movies & loved the books. I thought TLTW&TW was very well done.
The writer of this piece comes across as such a pretenious fop. He unintentually reveals much about his own self-absorbed lifestyle and political bent, but next to nothing about the actual literary and philosophical merits of the Nardia Chronicles themselves. His review of the film and the books reflects only his own narcissimn.
I'm sure he would have liked it had Aslan been gay and the White Witch had flashed her boobs a couple of times.
That is bcause he doesn't understand the symbolism behind the sacrifice Aslan, THE CREATOR, made to save someone who utterly did not deserve to be saved. When I re-read the book and then saw the movie, it brought tears to my eyes as I thought of how Jesus allowed himself to be utterly humiliated by his enemies so that I may be spared.
Your opinion was shared by my son. Of course he is a giant LotR fan. I would think it would be almost impossible for Chronicles to measure up to the Rings movies.
This guy's column has all of the intellectual sophistication of Beavis and Butthead, except that Beavis and Butthead are funny and this man is just an idiot. What kind of moron uses the pejorative "Suck" in the headline title of his column?
"a rather lean slice of delightfully wrought but fairly simpleminded, largely hobbled fantasy for the imagination-deprived"
There is no value in being "delightfully-wrought," Mr. Morford, if it doesn't serve your agenda? Imagination-deprived? Actually, one of the best things about the Narnia books is that they provide a fantastically rich context for imagination, while describing everything very lightly: He provides the edges of an image, and leaves the child's imagination to color it in.
Tolkein used the inverse means of stimulating imagination. He provided preposterous depth yet consistency of detail, allowing one to endlessly recycle his creations in new situations.
Between then two, there is an excellent school of imagination.
Of course, Ms. Morford only likes the Lord of the Rings because he thinks Sam and Frodo are gay.
Remember, this is the guy (?) who admitted licking doornobs in Republican's offices he would visit in an attempt to infect them with his cold. Literally a sicko.
"It is always the stupidest children who are the most childish, and the stupidest grown-ups who are the most grown up."
Exactly.
Why does reading Morford make me want to post sexy pictures of Catherine Zeta-Jones?
"Chronicles of Narnia" has made tons of $$$."
What? I thought the big hit of the Holiday season was "Brokeback Mountain".
This is one of my alltime favorite movies! My kids and I have seen it three times (first time EVER I have paid the theatre to see the same movie more than once, much less three times) and we just purchased the GBA game of Narnia (which is just as good!). I noticed not alot of Christian overtones in the movie aside of the Son of Adam and Daughter of Eve references.
This movie was definitely worth the wait! All the actors were really good and even the inexperience of the younger ones made it seem more real. I've read one review on here dogging it, but I disagreed with his opinion on it.
This is like one of those posts that starts out, "I am a Republican, but...."
Not sure Jadis' funbags would have done a lot for Morford.
Kitten looter!
Who's stopping you?
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