Posted on 05/28/2005 7:35:31 AM PDT by Neville72
A Manhattan banker wearing only a condom ambushed a female jogger on the Jersey Shore - but had to scram when she turned out to be a cop, prosecutors said yesterday. The officer threatened to blast 39-year-old John Dee Kelly with pepper spray and later got the plate number off his rented car, enabling cops to track the suspect down.
"He picked the wrong person to attack," said Assistant Monmouth County Prosecutor Robert Honecker. "This was a quick-thinking officer."
Kelly, who lives in Jersey City, rented a car from Hertz at Newark Airport on May 15 and drove to Union Beach, N.J., where he stripped down to his condom and laid in wait in the woods near a jogging trail, police said.
Around 1:30 p.m., Kelly allegedly pounced on the jogger but quickly found himself facing off with a furious female officer, police said.
(Excerpt) Read more at nydailynews.com ...
The Big Apple has some worms in it.
Jogging cops? I'd heard them big cities had transit cops, traffic cops, vice cops, homicide cops, etc, but jogging cops?
Ya gotta admit, the mental image is hilarious!
A banker rents a car, drives to the beach, gets naked (except for his condom--he's a planner, he is) and waits in the woods. My guess is he's an in-the-closet gay man who was waiting for his 'date', somehow got spooked or scared and started running, and then bumped into the jogging cop by accident.
If he can put on a condom and lay in wait for someone, I'd say he'd better lay off the viagra.
I'm not sure what you mean about giant dildos, but back to the story...too bad she wasn't packing. There are some nice jogging holster fanny packs handy to coneceal carry for these types of incidents.
Sounds like Benny Hill to me !
And I'd be willing to bet this isn't the first time he's done this. And that he was after more than a cheap thrill. He took care to see that he wouldn't leave any DNA or fiber evidence. He wasn't just looking to scare someone.
There are mortgage bankers...
... investment bankers ...
... and now sperm bankers.
What will be his sentence I wonder,
If you are willing to have sex with a random stranger, hire a professional. He could have saved the rental car fees.
This is one sick dude.
How would you like to be the client that shook hands with this slime bucket earlier that day?
I still think he was trolling for guys, got spooked or 'interrupted' by someone or something, and ran into the jogging cop by accident. But I could be wrong.
:-)
If so, his technique leaves a lot to be desired.
Or the women who worked with him...
yeah , here in NYC there is an ebb & flow to the zany,wacky daily newsworthy stuff ,... the big news last night was a shootout right outside Sylvia's , a popular eatery where Bubba got some of the arterial problems,no doubt[40+ shots fired??]
Wow. What was up with that?
the cops got a tip on the perp,he tried to run,went around a corner,more cops came from other end of the block,perp dead , 2 bystanders wounded,local TV had a tourist[1st day in NYC!!] you could tell she'll never forget that one
How long was he lurking with his condom on? Did he have one of those "rare" Cialis 4-hour erections?
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