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OBITUARY: The death of a beloved old friend
henrythornton.com ^ | 8/30/2004 | Anon

Posted on 08/30/2004 5:10:43 AM PDT by B4Ranch

OBITUARY: The death of a beloved old friend

Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend by the name of Common Sense who has been with us for many years.

No one knows for sure how old he was since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.

He will be remembered as having cultivated such value lessons as knowing when to come in out of the rain, why the early bird gets the worm and that life isn't always fair.

Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you earn) and reliable parenting strategies (adults, not kids, are in charge).

His health began to rapidly deteriorate when well intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place.

Reports of a six-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.

It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer aspirin to a student; but could not inform the parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.

Finally, Common sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments became contraband; churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims.

Common Sense finally gave up the ghost after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot, she spilled a bit in her lap, and was awarded a huge settlement.

Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust, his wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason.

He is survived by two stepbrothers; My Rights and Ima Whiner.

Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone.

If you still know him pass this on; if not, join the majority and do nothing.


TOPICS: Culture/Society; Editorial; News/Current Events
KEYWORDS: commonsense
This an email that I've had saved for a few years with no known author.
1 posted on 08/30/2004 5:10:43 AM PDT by B4Ranch
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To: B4Ranch; Laura Earl

Common Sense hasn't died. It is alive and well at my house.


2 posted on 08/30/2004 5:12:58 AM PDT by Conspiracy Guy (I'm Conspiracy Guy and I approve this message. "John Kerry is a liar!")
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To: B4Ranch

He did not die from natural cause. Liberals have hi-jacked the court system and usurped legislative powers killing any remaining common sense our system oncce had.


3 posted on 08/30/2004 5:13:39 AM PDT by Always Right
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To: B4Ranch
Common Sense didn't die

However "he" only visits those who welcome "him"

4 posted on 08/30/2004 5:15:35 AM PDT by apackof2 (Damn the torpedos! Full speed ahead!)
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To: Conspiracy Guy; B4Ranch

Alive and kickin'! Looks on in disdain in the pockets of society where he is no longer acknowledged.


5 posted on 08/30/2004 5:36:11 AM PDT by Laura Earl (No rest for the wicked.)
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To: Laura Earl

Common Sense is much more valuable than any other kind.


6 posted on 08/30/2004 5:44:37 AM PDT by Conspiracy Guy (I'm Conspiracy Guy and I approve this message. "John Kerry is a liar!")
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To: Conspiracy Guy

yeppers


7 posted on 08/30/2004 5:47:31 AM PDT by Laura Earl (No rest for the wicked.)
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To: B4Ranch
I've known for many years that he was very sick.

He first contracted this terminal disease when I was just a kid - during the administration of Franklin D. Roosevelt - but his symptoms didn't become life threatening until the early '60s when family values were replaced by self interest.
He further declined with the rise of feminism, homosexuality, pornography and liberalism in the guise of compassion and open mindedness.
His death knell was propagated by the steady advance of socialism in our society, and the steadfast refusal of the leaders of this country to adhere to the Constitution of the United States of America - the most Common Sense article ever written.

8 posted on 08/30/2004 6:12:40 AM PDT by TexasCowboy
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To: B4Ranch

My mother had it pinned to the fridge for a while. Not sure if it's still there - probably buried under all those pizza vouchers we never use, and those annoying mini-calendars from every real estate agent in a ten-mile radius...


9 posted on 08/30/2004 8:15:27 AM PDT by KangarooJacqui ("It ain't easy, living...")
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To: B4Ranch

bump


10 posted on 08/30/2004 8:46:10 AM PDT by tpaine (No man has a natural right to commit aggression on the equal rights of another. - T. Jefferson)
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To: B4Ranch

Thanks for posting this, B4. I too mourn the loss of common sense in our country, but being an optimist, I've always hoped for his resurrection. He is badly needed.


11 posted on 08/30/2004 9:31:02 AM PDT by janetgreen
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To: janetgreen

I've always considered Common Sense to be a woman. Us men have other things on our mind that interfere with Common Sense.

Who in you mom and Dad's home was the most frequent user of, "What happened to Common Sense?"

My wife asks me that question all the time. I'm willing to perform beside the highway, on the lawn in the back yard, on the couch, in a movie theater, leaning against the wall, darn near anywhere but oh no, she wants the shower, the wine and all the rest.

Getting older certainly has changed that lady of mine!

Where's her Common Sense? We need to keep life exciting. All this planning, hummph!


12 posted on 08/30/2004 11:46:20 AM PDT by B4Ranch (You can evade reality, but you cannot evade the consequences of evading reality - Ayn Rand)
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To: TexasCowboy

Why did I just know that you were close friends with Common Sense? Must be the boots and hat.


13 posted on 08/30/2004 11:47:46 AM PDT by B4Ranch (You can evade reality, but you cannot evade the consequences of evading reality - Ayn Rand)
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To: KangarooJacqui

>>pizza vouchers we never use, and those annoying mini-calendars<<

We must have the same mailman!


14 posted on 08/30/2004 11:49:23 AM PDT by B4Ranch (You can evade reality, but you cannot evade the consequences of evading reality - Ayn Rand)
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To: B4Ranch

BTTT


15 posted on 08/30/2004 11:50:48 AM PDT by Fiddlstix (This Tagline for sale. (Presented by TagLines R US))
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To: B4Ranch
Who in you mom and Dad's home was the most frequent user of, "What happened to Common Sense?"

My dear departed Mama was the queen of common sense! Raising kids usually keeps us "wimmin" like that... :^)

16 posted on 08/30/2004 12:16:08 PM PDT by janetgreen
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To: janetgreen

"Raising kids and tryinging to keep a husband under control" would be how my darling wife would say that. Twenty six years and she's still working hard at the game, everyday.

I have learned that it is much easier to attain forgiveness than permission from her, so I doubt I'm going to change much.


17 posted on 08/30/2004 12:57:43 PM PDT by B4Ranch (You can evade reality, but you cannot evade the consequences of evading reality - Ayn Rand)
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