Makeup for men? Say it ain't so

The Bradenton Harold ^ | Apr. 02, 2004 | WADE TATANGELO

[delacoert]

"Dad, all the other guys are getting their own nail fortifiers and Kohl concealer pens and . . ."

"Arggh."

"Well, my girlfriend says I oughta get a kit before the homecoming dance."

"Arggh!"

[delacoert]

I narrowly avioded a Madison Avenue induced dissociative fugue state brought on by witnessing a commercial for skin moisture for men Gillette Unveils Print, TV Ads for New Gillette Complete Skincare for Men; New Skincare Line Delivers Five Signs of Healthy-looking Skin in Just 14 Days - Guaranteed . Gillette/Madison Avenue have undoubtedly done their homework with test audiences and concluded that this skin moisturizer product line advertisement campaign will be successful in reaching a segment of the male consumer audience, but it has provoked me to dispose of anything and everything Gillette. What has/will become of the male gender? /rant

[goldstategop]

I guess we're becoming metrosexual.

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[Eddie Dean]

Does this mean we can be late for dates with impunity?

[Enterprise]

"I guess we're becoming metrosexual."

Oh no we're not!

[goldstategop]

I guess if we do makeup, the women will run screaming for the hills after one look at how clumsily we do it. hehehe

[Enterprise]

"Does this mean we can be late for dates with impunity?"

Only if I can convince her that I couldn't find the right shade of eye shadow to match my liver spots.

[COBOL2Java]

[Eddie Dean]

Does this mean we can be late for dates with impunity?"

Only if I can convince her that I couldn't find the right shade of eye shadow to match my liver spots.

Try a coppery taupe (as opposed to a copper top)

[rabidralph]

When I was in college in the midwest in the early 80s, there was this kid from Atlanta who regularly wore makeup. He was always well groomed, wore sweaters all the time and if you looked real close, he had a thin veneer of foundation to hide his pockmarked skin. Yes, he was creepy looking. But I figured that's what men did in the south.

[goldstategop]

Michael Jackson on his worst face day.

[Thebaddog]

How much for that Roadapple Colgone?

[SedVictaCatoni]

This isn't anything new. Once upon a time, they were dandies, then before that fops. In prior decades, men were interested in elegantly groomed hair using hair gel (pomade). Before that, they took great care to wear the proper spats and cravats.

A little piece of history: in the nineteenth century, the same sort of men were interested in macassar oil, the hair tonic which was all the rage. (So called because it came from Macassar, on Celebes.) So many men used macassar oil that people began to have to take measures to protect their upholstery, as the headrests on chairs would become oily and stained from the hair tonic which seeped from mens' heads as they laid against them.

So were born the little cloth draperies which people still today place over the headrests of recliners. Everybody has, however, forgotten that these are called antimacassars, and they're supposed to protect against macassar oil.

[longtermmemmory]

Makeup companies have been DESPERATE to get men to buy their products. They view men as an untapped audience. Outside of the homosexual market they will remain so.

This is like the fiasco of maxim hair color highlites, they were trying to market it to straight men with carmen electra and a showing a male job ablicant driving a woman boss to seduction. The men in those commercials looked like pansies no matter. The product is gone from stores.

I am willint to bet the only way normal men have possesion of these products is from their pushy broad girlfriends or wives. The only way a man could minimize the embarasment of buying such humiliating products is to have in come in a box in a plain brown wraper with the words "DANGER: Pictures of Beautiful Naked Women Inside."

This marketing is probably being lead by the same woman who was able to siglehandedly kill off oldmobile with her incompetence. (seriously, your fathers' olds kicked posterior.)

[martin_fierro]

Slap an H-D logo on it, and Joe'll buy it.

<|:)~

[Eddie Dean]

When I was in college in the midwest in the early 80s, there was this kid from Atlanta who regularly wore makeup

I knew a guy while in the Army (still rememnber his name - Joe Mix[weird name - and weird guy]) that was a big fan of eyeliner.

He was from Cali, a steroid head, and crazy as a loon.

At one point, he got busted for grand larceny of the PX (stole a $1000 video camera) and then, while awaiting trial, fire-bombed the JAG building on base (Ft. Campbell) in some wacked out attempt to through his case out (hoped to burn up records I guess).

Well then he split, and was picked up by some Navy MP's out in CA.

[Enterprise]

Thanks. I would just absolutely wilt if I couldn't get good dating advice from FreeRepublic.

[Tijeras_Slim]

Welcome to FR.

[Eddie Dean]

Thanks. I would just absolutely wilt if I couldn't get good dating advice from FreeRepublic.

LOL....

Ya know, we men could just think of it as time to "Camo Up"

(I hope I don't need to add </sarc tags, to denote satire)

[Eddie Dean]

Thank you!

I've been lurking for a while, but I decided finally to get wet.