Morford: Romeo And Romeo In Hell (why you never, ever want to live in Kansas)

San Francisco Chronicle ^ | Wednesday, February 11, 2004 | Mark Morford; rapidly closing in on 42-year life-expectancy

[presidio9]

Kneel down. Put your hands together. Offer thanks right this very moment to whatever deity you desire that that you are not 18 years old and gay and living in the state of Kansas right now.

This gratitude, it is a given. This is so much of a given you might not even need to hear why. You just say to yourself, oh my freaking God, I can only imagine.

[CholeraJoe]

the Bible is the absolute literal word of an angry fire-breathing football-lovin' Shania-lovin' war-happy God,

The author forgot NASCAR.

[Democratshavenobrains]

Hey Morford. Aren't you the one lecturing us that judges should be obeyed?

[dfwgator]

Whatever.

[yankeedame]

Offer thanks right this very moment to whatever deity you desire that that you are not 18 years old and gay and living in the state of Kansas right now.

(Gallic shrug) So? You're 18. You're not nailed to the place. Either move or shut up.

[cyborg]

If he feels so threatened then he should carry a gun. Otherwise STFU.

[dd5339]

To the population of Kaliforney who agree with this article....

Go ahead and stay out of Kansas! We really don't care about your alternative/pierced/tatooed/diseased/drug using/homeless infested/high tax lifestyle.

Semper Fi

[dangus]

So I presume Morford considers that pedophile priest who caused all the ruckus in Boston to be a hero and a role model, right?

I mean, that *is* what his problem with Kansas is, that they don't allow adults to have gay sex with pubescent boys. And he can't even issue that the issue is hypocrisy because that pervert from Boston did all he could to win the "right" to "inter-generational" homosexual sex.

Funny how liberals will even bash you for being overly tolerant of them, isn't it?

[Ronly Bonly Jones]

Kneel down. Put your hands together. Offer thanks right this very moment to whatever deity you desire that that you are not 18 years old and gay and living in the state of Kansas right now. >>>

Actually I do so every day, thanking God I am not gay. End of statement. Living in Kansas I could take or leave. Being 18?... ;-) never mind.

[OpusatFR]

"And let's say you dare to give in to your lovelust and have consensual gay sex with a minor -- say, a gay 14-year-old boy."

Too bad. If I were that Mom, you'd be picking the glass out of your head with your toenails. What next, 12 year olds, how about six?

I really find this man disgusting.

[dangus]

>>These uptight colon-clenched Georgian parents<<

They only clench their colons when they have good reason to, Mr. Morford.

>>Be grateful you don't live in Kansas<<

Gee, Mr. Morford, just how many of your readers WANT to have gay sex with young boys?

[little jeremiah]

Homosexual Agenda Ping Alert: Warning, this is a ripe one. I think it needs a wider audience, though. Maybe freepers is Kansas should let it be known what the homo-nazis (sorry, it just slipped out) think about the laws of their fair state.

Gosh, maybe I should move to Kansas. So what if it doesn't have any trees.

Let me know if you want on or off this ping list!

[King Black Robe]

So, being molested by an 18 year old makes a person gay? Poor kid. Sounds to me like Kansans are the ones who should be giving thanks. Keeping child molesters locked up sounds like a good idea to me.

[centurion316]

I live in Kansas and I, too, am outraged.

The guy who had consensual sex with a male 14-year old should be serving 30 years, not 17. The same goes for the guy who had consensual sex with a female 14-year old.

Society has an obligation to protect children from self-centered, immoral adults who prey upon them. Hanging, burning, drawing and quartering having fallen out of fashion; putting these monsters away for a very long time seems only appropriate.

There should be no doubt that one of the objectives of the homosexual crowd is to gain unfettered access to other people's children so that they can have their pick of the most desirable ones as sexual toys and playthings.

[cavtrooper21]

Grrrrrrr...

[Right Wing Professor]

Boy, Morford really has his frillies in a twist about this one, doesn't he?

[TheBigB]

Sentient well-souled bipeds who can speak in complete sentences

Well that lets Marky Mark out right there.

[Iron Matron]

They only clench their colons when they have good reason to, Mr. Morford

Like when taking a walk in san francisco.

[mountaineer]

I never can stand to read his columns closely enough, so someone will have to tell me if Missy Morford was true to form with this one: did he blame Ashcroft for something or say something vaguely homoerotic about George Bush?

[TheBigB]

He was probably making plans to head to Kansas to meet a few minors...now he's all disappointed that he can't go.

[KentTrappedInLiberalSeattle]

Kneel down.

Now, why am I anything but startled that Little Mary Morford would begin one of his columns with this particular two-word phrase...? :)

[Former Proud Canadian]

Uhh, I thought there was no such thing as consensual sex with a minor. They are not considered mature enough to give their consent. Looks like that concept eluded the author.

[presidio9]

ping

[Right Wing Professor]

Kneel down.

Now, why am I anything but startled that Little Mary Morford would begin one of his columns with this particular two-word phrase...? :)

Well, the problem is, after typing it, he has to cool off for 20 minutes before writing anything else.

[presidio9]

I'm guessing you didn't get this far:

"And Kansas' brand of bilious Bible-whacked homophobia is exactly what BushCo's demonically powerful ultraconservative Right would love to see spread across the land like a cancer. "

[Lunatic Fringe]

Seriously... if you are 18 and you need to get into the sack with a 14-year old... you have more problems than just being gay in Kansas.

[Right Wing Professor]

He was probably making plans to head to Kansas to meet a few minors...now he's all disappointed that he can't go.

If he tried that in Nebraska, jail time would be the least of his problems.

[KentTrappedInLiberalSeattle]

As if being a teen isn't bad enough. As if being gay isn't difficult enough.

As if being Mark Morford isn't awful enough. :)

[zerosix]

What this person "forgets" (read sarcasm) to add is that the 14 year old in question is that he was in a home for the mentally-impaired.

Since when is it OK to have whatever kind of sex you want with a mentally-impaired juvenille?

Oops, I forget, in Gay America, children no matter what their mental state is, is OK.

[dd5339]

Hey Cav,

How about forwarding this over to Reverend Phelps? Maybe this author is in need of a Phelping!!!!!

Semper Fi and my ribs hurt from thinking of it!

[anonymous_user]

Mr. Morford: If you need me, I'll be in the living room while you're up on the cross. Thx.

[zerosix]

Hey, if you'd ever been to Kansas you would see that we have pleny of trees but we're happy to keep the secret to ourselves - at least to those from San Fran.

[presidio9]

He was probably making plans to head to Kansas to meet a few minors...now he's all disappointed that he can't go.

I blame this person for frequent buttsex misconceptions about the Sunflower State:

Rock-Chalk-Jayhawk

[netmilsmom]

>>"And Kansas' brand of bilious Bible-whacked homophobia is exactly what BushCo's demonically powerful ultraconservative Right would love to see spread across the land like a cancer. " <<

This is the kind of "cancer" I would like to spread to MI!

[MissAmericanPie]

It isn't the citizens of Kansas wallowing around in a trough. They have thousands of years of historical evidence to back up the fact that homosexuality destroys or is at the very least a contributing factor in the destruction of nations and societies starting with Sodom and Gamorah, the Greeks, etc.

Healthy societies pass laws to protect itself from the disease of deviancy, move to France, they are so enlightened there.

[Lion Den Dan]

Little queer is lucky castration is not part of the sentence

[MarMema]

If only I could vote for Bush twice.

[Southack]

SIDENOTE: Phelps is a radical liberal Democrat who wears uber-Conservative clothing only to bring scorn and shame upon us via association.

[realpatriot71]

Hmmm, I guess old gay men should stop having sex with adolescent boys in Kansas.

That's how we do it in Kansas, and if you don't like it . . . thanks for visting, don't let the door hitcha'!

[presidio9]

Morford and homosexual pedophiles apparently have a problem with this woman?

[LibWhacker]

For about 20 years.

I knew there was a reason I left Kansas; it should be 50, no parole.

[Servant of the 9]

FOFL.

He's obviously demented, but it is a fine rant.

His friends might be able to have an intervention and unbunch his panties before he pinches off the blood supply to the little head. It is way too late for the big head.

SO9

[little jeremiah]

Really? Trees? I may be moving away from present location this spring, and want to move somewhere awaaaayy from the west coast. Hmm, how hot does it get in the summer?

And it would be nice change to live in a state that has laws such as the one stated!

[ZOOKER]

Well, our terrible secret is out.

We don't cotten to folks like you around here, Mr. Morford. We don't like you big-city degenerates who want to bend over our little boys. Or little girls.

Intolerant? Yep.

In fact, if you come here and try it, you should thank your favorite diety if you even live long enough to serve a prison term.

PC? never been there, it ain't around here, so you best be movin' on to where it might be. Try about 1500 miles West. Or East.

[Gritty]

Ms Morford is full of a lot more hate and rage than any Bible-totin', Ashcroft quotin', Creation-lovin' trogdolyte I've ever met.

He needs the Lord, from whom he is obviously desperately running. He needs genuine healing for his sin-twisted soul, not another flesh or plastic sex toy. He can run, he can rail, he can write until the cows come home, but he can't hide.

[cavtrooper21]

Mr Morford will be facing his just reward soon enough, but that does sound like a great idea...

I'll take care of it personally!

[cavtrooper21]

We know, but he's lot's of fun to sick on folks like Morford just to watch the show..

[.cnI redruM]

>>>>>>>>>Kneel down. Put your hands together. Offer thanks right this very moment to whatever deity you desire that that you are not 18 years old and gay and living in the state of Kansas right now.

I've FReeped for 2/3 of a year. I've read many of the truly deep thoughts of Mark Morford. This is the first time I can remember reading an entire paragraph that I actually agreed with. As for the rest of the article, well.....

[hattend]

Ms. Morford...if you're 18, gay and living in Kansas and having a rough time, feel free to move to Massachusetts.

[lawdude]

"Mark Morford; rapidly closing in on 42-year life-expectancy"

AND DARN PROUD OF IT? Is he bragging or complaining?