Interesting about your feral momma. Mine has the same aversion to two-handed handling, so maybe that’s a rational defense mechanism common to feral cats. I do catch her off guard at petting time and forceably pick her up, to train her, and she is getting better. It’s funny that when she is outside she is much easier to handle, including picking up.
To be truthful, I've respected her wish not to be picked up and so don't really try........