Posted on 05/29/2018 10:14:29 PM PDT by DeweyCA
Mrs. Web is exactly right. Been there, done that.
Even King David had Abishag to warm his bones.
Billy Graham was never, I repeat never, alone with a woman except his wife. And that was the key to his successful marriage.
read her she can be funny
“The perennial question of whether men and women can be just friends...”
And perennially the answer is no for the vast amount of people. The reason is almost invariably because men want to have sex with any woman who is civil to them.
“Byrd is no fan of the Mike Pence rule, which as practiced by the vice president means he won’t dine alone with a woman who is not his wife nor attend events serving alcohol unless she is with him.”
I think the Chuck Berry rule is better. Before Berry (the music legend) would have sex with a woman he would require that she be photographed topless and smiling with his arm around her.
True, but so what? Our impurity is why we ought to avoid.
“Regarding the Bible, St. Paul told Timothy to treat older women as mothers and younger women as sisters, “with absolute purity.” (1 Tim. 5:2) It is reasonable to assume that St. Paul considered this a reasonable instruction, that Timothy could, fortified by the Holy Spirit, do so.”
That is the ideal. However the monkey brained human nature that often is exhibited is far from the ideal. Case in point: we attended sensitivity training and sexual harassment training in the military and one time it was given to us by our Chief of Staff (06) Captain and he basically quoted 1 Tim 5:2 to treat them like sisters. Later it was revealed that our sensitive Chief of Staff was severely reprimanded for shagging his executive secretary, who usurped this imaginary power when dealing with command, and revealed the whole affair when being reprimanded for creating strife amongst the crew whilst overextending her authority.
IMO Men and Women can be friends so long as neither is attracted to the other.
In tnis day and age with the me2 campaign seeking to take out some abusers and other men I find it even more sensible for Pastors or other men of standing to avoid all potential allegations of sexual impropriety by sticking to the rule that serves Mike Pence. From my reading I believe Billy Graham stuck to this rule all his live. The Word of Gos says that the heart is deceitful above all things. Anyone who presumes themsevles to be pire of heart and beyond temptation does not really know themselves as they ought.
I'm 63 and married for 36 years. I never wear my wedding ring except when spousal unit and I are dressing up. In Montana that means clean jeans and shirt and shoes without mud or crap on them.
The no ring thing started when I was much younger doing manual labor and we were encouraged not to wear rings as they could get stuck on something and cause injury. It became a habit that is still with me even into retirement.
But I've had more than a few encounters with local women, ones that don't know me, throwing themselves at me in obvious ways. I get quite the chuckle out of it. Some of these gals are desperate.
I was mentioning this to the gal that cuts my hair and she told me single guys in this area are few and far between and the widows and single mature gals far outnumber them. Those guys don't stand a chance, she said. The gals around here are cutthroat.
There also should be a Meg Ryan rule...
Women need to avoid crappy plastic surgery.
I've heard a few comments at events I attend where one woman will make a comment to another (or a group of others...) that so-and-so is hers and the rest better keep their hands off ....
As if we men don't have a choice? ROFL!!!
And then there are the comments about the woman I'm dating (45 years old, from China and very attractive) that just really piss me off. I can handle the derogatory comments about me, that's fine. The comments made about her are just so out of line by stupid, ignorant women that it's obvious why they're still single. If they had half the class, manners and grace she does they'd be much better off.
There are also “daddy issues”.
Yes there are .... I won’t go there though.
Yes, that is true. However, I was addressing the author's contention that it is not "Biblical" to propose that men and women have the capacity to interact with one another chastely. Rather, this is the default contention of the New Testament: that with God's grace, with the practice of Christian discipline and virtue, with a mind conformed to Christ, we can expect more of ourselves than of apes.
If one is not Christian, of course, then these points probably aren't relevant.
I’ve got a friend, who I met when we were both leaders in the Jr High ministry at our church.
I had been a leader in that ministry for a few years, so I was a veteran. It was my home, my place of comfort. It was a LARGE youth ministry, made up of about 6 teams. Each team could have 6-12 leaders. Male and female. So every woman on that team was like a sister...sort of. In the most benign and boring sort of way.
When my friend Heidi came on board, we had never met.
She was just another woman leader on my team.
Was she attractive?
Yes ... but I never paid much attention to that.
She was a blond gal, who had been a cheerleader at Southern Miss...
And at times, acted like a blond...
A blond with the enthusiasm of a cheerleader.
I tease virtually EVERYBODY.
Heidi was a target rich environment.
So this was MY “no pressure” scenario.
It didn’t take long for us to build a brotherly sisterly relationship of teasing each other back and forth.
I knew it was good, when Heidi would say something (blondish)
and all the leaders would look at me, expecting a shot.
It got to a point that nothing needed to be said, just a facial expression.
I was also the brother that listened to her when a couple of her relationships ended.
I also listened to her ... ALOT...
When a new guy named Craig came around.
Craig is a carpenter, I’m a pipefitter, so as tradesmen we had a certain affinity.
He learned early that I wasn’t a threat and we got along great.
When Craig and Heidi got married, Craig asked me to be an usher.
A couple of years after Craig and Heidi got married, they had a party/ cook out at their house.
I knew Heidi’s 3 sisters and their husbands.
I knew Heidi’s parents.
I knew Craig’s parents.
Craig’s much younger little brother was specifically in my small group in the Jr High ministry.
But at this party, all these family members were around us, all at the same time, for at least a few hours.
Heidi and I were going back and forth like we always do, and her now father in law says: “Holy Cow, you guys are like brother and sister.”
To which Heidi responded IMMEDIATELY: “Yeah, he’s like the brother I never wanted.”
Heidi and I, as well as everybody else had a good laugh over that.
It was also at that time that we realized that it was one thing to say we were like brother and sister, but when family saw it, we no longer needed to even say it.
If you’re pure in heart and spiritually mature, you won’t go astray, her theory goes .....
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Even if that statement was true 100% of the time, which obviously it is not, in this day and age and political climate, if you are a public figure, the Pence Rule is the smart way to go, IMO. People lie for money and political gain so no matter how pure in heart/spiritually mature someone is, they can still be set up (he said/she said - tough to refute, especially if you’re anything other than a Democrat) unless they take precautions.
So that's what I try to do.
The problem with this theory, is that one party can have their emotions and morality in check while the other person becomes the wild card based on the emotional examples and influences that surrounded them while growing into adulthood.
When I have to work with someone of the opposite sex, I always keep it strictly business with a little mentoring of needed, otherwise, I avoid getting into those situations like the plague because you never know when you'll be in the wrong place at the wrong time with someone unfamiliar who might be of questionable character.
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