Posted on 01/16/2018 7:06:46 AM PST by SandRat
People frequently say things without considering the possibility of getting a response from folks on the receiving end of those casual comments.
For example, when you walk up to checkout counters, the humans operating the tallying machine designed to separate you from your money, may say “Hi, how are you?” or “Howzit going?” or “Welcome to XYZ Stores.” Those are rote niceties for which they do not expect a response.
Be different and answer, just to see what happens.
“I’m fine, thank you. And how are you?”
The sharp ones will reply, “Couldn’t be better.” or “Fine.”
The ones slower to catch on may answer with total honesty. “I’ll be better in forty-five minutes.” Translation, he or she gets off work soon, and they can hardly wait.
Another variation on the above conversation starter is that the customer will launch into the particulars of their hard day at work. Sometimes that robot question results in an unscheduled visit to the too much information (also known as TMI) realm as the customer complains about their spouse or their children.
“Jack and I had a fight before bed last night. That’s the fourth night in a row without sex.”
If the checker is nosey, he or she may ask for particulars, offer advice, or suggest something cozier. Never underestimate the ability of strangers to leap over the line of decorum into no-no land.
Interacting with waitstaff in a restaurant is much more entertaining and rewarding.
“Hi, my name is Bob. I’ll be your server this evening.”
“Hi, Bob. How are you today?”
“I’m great, thanks for asking.”
If you treat Bob as a person rather than an interchangeable cog, he will take great care of your table. The water glasses will be full. The food will arrive without added protein by way of a spit or two. Overall, the experience for customer and waitperson alike will be pleasant.
As a side note, if Bob has time to chat, encourage such friendliness. He may tell you a secret or two about the restaurant, its personnel or unusual things customers did or said. Such tidbits could appear in future columns.
Another perk of being polite and friendly with the waitstaff is they will make an effort to accommodate your requests. There was the time an entire baseball team sat at the table next to us. Due to the ear-shattering sounds caused by many young male voices, it was impossible to have a conversation or even give the waiter our order. By using sign language of the polite variety, we asked to sit at another table, preferably in the next county.
When a cashier or a waitperson asks the loaded question “Will there be anything else?” or “Would you like anything else?” the correct answer is not “yes” or “no.” The reply that should flow trippingly off your tongue is “Not unless you are giving away a million dollars.”
That reply will stop them in mid-response, their mouths move, but no sound emerges. After they recover, they laugh. “If I had a million dollars, I wouldn’t be working here or anywhere else.”
Recently, a book marketing service contacted this writer offering to help boost the sales of her books. Since curiosity is one of our many vices, a few clicks transported her to Misspelled Words Hell. There were so many errors in their pitch that any interest a writer had in hiring this group of buffoons disappeared.
Later, an ad from the same group popped up on Facebook, the bastion of proper grammar. Even the company’s advertisement had misspelled words.
So the English teacher alter-ego sent an email to the company.
“Thank you, but I am not interested in using your service. By the way, your ad on Facebook as well as your website information is full of misspelled words.”
They replied: “Thanks, we’ll have to look into that.”
We are taking bets on when, if ever, those errors vanish in a puff of correctly spelled words.
this might get amusing
Don’t Fergit Ta Laff!
;)
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I’m Giggling NON-STOP
Trump Derangement Syndrome is all you need to laugh.
As a senior, visits to the local grocery store provide a
‘social group’. In this severe weather I’ve been thanking the clerks for driving on the ice and showing up, with blessings for their safety.
When clerks ask me to show ID for certain purchases, I complain that although I only appear to be 17 yrs. old.......that’s when their laughter takes over.
I have some stock answers.
“How are you?” I am superfantastic. Good as any and better than many. (I got that from the late Keith Harrell who did a motivational seminar at my company back in the early 90s)
“How are you?” Great, but it is still early.
At a fancy restaurant:
My wife and I went to an upscale steak house for dinner one night. We wound up getting a free shrimp cocktail for this one. “Can I take your order?” Yes, are you still having the 2 for 1 special on tuna salad sandwiches?
We don’t eat out as much as we used to but I usually make sure if the server gives his or her name to get that person my name. It helps me remember. We usually have detailed orders such as “shrimp and grits, no cheese, no barbecue sauce, and no bacon.” (sorry to the southern freepers but that’s how they serve in in KC.) Then I tell them that we’re high maintenance but we tip well. As a result, we not only get great advice on what to order (i.e., which beer) but also quick service. If there’s a question, the server will go directly to the cook or the bar tender and come right back with an answer. I have also been known to ask whether I can pray for the server or ask whether they are in school.
Favorite!:
How are you?
HTF do I know???I look like a doctor to YOU?
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(Be Careful w/this one!)
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;(
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It gets a smile, and it has the added advantage of being true.
Very funny.
I hear friendly, casual conversations between customers and checkout clerks all the time, and engage in them myself. Of course, I live in the South.
buy, of course you do, those awfull Blue Belly Yank’s won’t do that.
I have friendly casual conversations with virtually every clerk, waiter, receptionist or cashier that I meet. I always greet them, ask how they are doing and give them time to answer. And add humor and a smile when possible. I purposely refuse to use self checkout except under very limited circumstances. And I always get good service. And if I wasn’t getting good service I probably would not know because I am a male version of Pollyanna.
I have friendly casual conversations with virtually every clerk, waiter, receptionist or cashier that I meet. I always greet them, ask how they are doing and give them time to answer. And add humor and a smile when possible. I purposely refuse to use self checkout except under very limited circumstances. And I always get good service. And if I wasn’t getting good service I probably would not know because I am a male version of Pollyanna.
The sharp ones will reply,better than what they say hope you are too.
Those are rote niceties for which they do not expect a response. Be different and answer, just to see what happens. “I’m fine, thank you. And how are you?”
If the rest of the country is like this guy, it smacks of Rude Nation.
I went to Chili’s one day and was greeted by the manager at the door with, “May I help you?”
Without missing a beat, I replied, “I’d like to buy some food.” What the heck else would I be doing there? LOL
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