 "Ommmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm..." |
Posted on 04/20/2017 6:34:20 PM PDT by ameribbean expat
Analyzing the feedback, the researchers claim mindfulness as it is typically practiced is ideal for women, who stereotypically ruminate on things. The practice teaches them to let go of the past and future, and focus on the now.
Meanwhile the biggest stress-driver for male participants was the fact that they distract - completely shutting off past and future worries. Since they were, in general, already focused on the present moment, mindfulness was relatively futile.
(Excerpt) Read more at dailymail.co.uk ...
“stereotypically ruminate on “bad” things “their husbands have done”
Fixed it.
True enough.
I loved my deceased wife, rest her soul. But I sometimes felt I was being judged unfairly by her, by her use of ever shifting criteria which I didn’t know about. And I felt I had no say in setting the standards by which I was to be judged; no input as to whether those criteria were fair or not.
or put another way, men are from Mars, women from Venus??
Men and women are different. Not PC to say in today’s world, but the two sexes are different in their behaviors and outlooks on things.
They don't believe in absolutes. They love being the arbiter of “absolute relativeness,” because it can always make you “wrong.”
I have dated such a lady, and she was crazy.
Of course, your Mrs. Dilbert was not the lady I dated.
Which most times their husbands aren’t really sure what they’ve done. Most times not all.
Yep, I hear you.
My wife was a wonderful woman in many ways. But she had her moments, and we got into it sometimes. And there were times when I felt judged by absurd criteria of her criticizing my behavior and actions.
I know it’s a cliche about men from Mars, women from Venus, but I believe there’s something to that.
The Dali Lama says a nap is the perfect form of meditation
I’d go further: male and female brains work differently. Every one of those useless academic pinheads that think men and women are really identical and interchangeable are fools.
In a good marriage, these differences supplement and enhance - but we are definitely different.
|
"Ommmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm..." |
In my experience and ymmv, but men tend to want to act like real jerks and then forget about it. I find it impossible to “move on” if I’ve been yelled at, cussed at, insulted, publicly humiliated, called ugly names had things thrown at me, been stuck in a car during a road rage incident- none of this is shelter worthy abuse but it’s pretty impossible to live with.
I have no idea if this was your habit or anyone else’s on this board, but, it seems like us venusians get blamed for harboring bad thoughts and blames and I just don’t think it’s reasonable for a man to do the above and have us somehow not care.
Just my observations and not just personal.
She was probably sh1t testing you. All women do it and many times even they are not aware they are doing it.
Here Here. Funny how this article became about how men and women relate and fight, not how they react to mindfullness meditation. I do think if those men commenting had of understood their females (which they seem to say is impossible) more, they wouldn’t have gotten yelled at as much, as well, maybe the females wouldn’t have bitched if the men were more gentle. Bad cycle, too bad cuz both have so many positive attributes. I liked the way the males said they “meditated”. Funny stuff.
Gee, it looks like you’ve been really unlucky with men. My husband does none of that. I haven’t really experienced that with other men, either.
I often wonder how Mr Persevero would react if I 1) cussed at him 2) called him a nasty name 3) threw something at him 4) had a road rage hissy ffitwith him sitting helplessly next to me while I drive like a maniac on purpose. With our kids in the car. 5) threatened to divorce him.
I’ve never done any of the above, not once. But I am sometimes accused of not letting things go. I find this unreasonable. The behavior above is plain old traumatizing and I’m not sure I’m a bad person for remembering.
I know I don’t have it all that great. I also know it could be worse. I play the hand I’m dealt.
I’ve never done any of the above, not once. But I am sometimes accused of not letting things go. I find this unreasonable. The behavior above is plain old traumatizing and I’m not sure I’m a bad person for remembering.
Remembering is one thing, dwelling on it and bringing it up is something else. If he cussed at you ten years ago and hasn’t done so since, I’d say it is well past time to move on. When my wife brings up history of single non-repeated incidents 5+ years back as if it happened yesterday and happens all the time, she completely derails my train of thought as I try to make sense of her perspective on life and can’t. We had a discussion about bread in a grocery store 16 years ago (I was raised on fairly cheap bread, she is a believer in whole grains), before we were engaged, that still pops up from time to time.
Seems it's more this thread that got to be more about how men and women fight. There's plenty in the article about what they studied and observed about mindfulness.
Regarding that, my doctor prescribed mindfulness meditation, and it seems to actually help. I view myself as a normal guy otherwise--Maybe I'm not doing it right. ;)
Good points. I’ll try to make sure that memories don’t get dredged up from too far back. It’s recurrent behavior that’s hard to let go.
I am man, I am so mindfull, my mind is too full.
What a joke!
When has any woman, ever let go of the past?
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.