Goldfinger's less popular cousin.
Posted on 09/21/2016 2:20:25 PM PDT by DUMBGRUNT
This take the idea of “Goldfinger” to a whole new light.
Just what I thought. Like minds.
Harrumph.
“Gold is money, everything else is credit.” — J.P. Morgan
:-)
Once again, a thief caught because he was a dumbass.
Yeah, I know, a terrible play on words.
But he was very stupid. First, you don’t go to the same damned place and sell the thing. Second, you don’t go to the same bank and deposit checks from the same place. Third, you don’t have the damned coins in you safe deposit box - or at least not one that can be traced to you.
There are SOOOO many ways that this could have been done that would not have raised suspicion (esp. since the Mint seems to have been almost as clueless as Mr. Golduphisass).
Me - if I’d have had the opportunity AND a similar lack of morals - I’d have stolen just like he did, and disposed of the gold in multiple locations.
But I’d have altered it - not too complex, you know, just melt it down and mold it into much smaller rounds.
Take trips over the border to the US - NOBODY would inspect his car to that degree - and sell off a couple thousand dollars at a time.
Don’t deposit the gold into your own account - set up a U.S.-based corporation or LLC, and open an account in ITS name (with a safe deposit box, if you’d like to store some of the unsold gold).
Retire, or claim that you got a better job somewhere else, after several years - but don’t steal for the last year or so. Maybe stop after a somewhat disliked employee leaves, then quit 9, 12 or 15 months later.
It gets better:
“Investigators also found a container of vaseline in his locker and the trial was presented with the prospect that a puck could be concealed in an anal cavity and not be detected by the wand. In preparation for these proceedings, in fact, a security employee actually tested the idea, Barnes said.”
(’How as your day at work, honey?’)
Guess he was auditioning for a remake of the James Bond movie “Goldfinger”.
#30. You’ve force me to tell two bad jokes about “goldfinger”.
What do you call a Jewish gynecologist? Goldfinger.
What do you can an Eskimo gynecologist? Coldfinger.
[Just made this up so forgive me. I haven’t had dinner yet]
What do you call a retired gynecologist? “Oldfinger”
Goldfinger's less popular cousin.
Can’t make it up.
” those women had all kinds of monetary things stuck up their woowoos.”
Omigosh, I laughed so hard I almost choked!
LOL........ great joke and I’ve never heard it before.
Ought to be a thread....
Best jokes.
Goldenbutt would follow Goldfinger. :-)
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