Posted on 03/30/2015 12:28:09 AM PDT by Cincinatus' Wife
Full title: 'He died while smoking, drinking whiskey and telling lies': Hilarious and heartfelt obituary to Alaska fisherman, 60, published in local paper by adoring daughter
".........The obituary goes on to tell the story of Malcolm's life, starting with his upbringing in Kirkland, Washington. At the age of 19, Malcolm left his home state for Dutch Harbor, Alaska in order to realize his life's calling to 'yell at deckhands on commercial fishing boats.'
For forty years, Malcolm worked as a boat cook, mechanic, deckhand, captain and boat owner catching crab, halibut, black cod and salmon - mostly out of the Bering Sea.
It was after a crab-fishing trip that he met his wife Maureen, who he found 'in his bed' and decided to keep......"
....'Don had a life-time love affair with Patsy Cline, Rainier beer, iceberg lettuce salads and the History Channel (which allowed him to call his wife and daughters everyday in order to relay the latest WWII facts he learned),' the obituary continues. 'He excelled at attempting home improvement projects, outsmarting rabbits, annoying the women in his life and reading every book he could get his hands on.
'His life goal was to beat his wife at Scrabble, and although he never succeeded, his dream lives on in the family he left behind.'
After the obituary was published on Wednesday, daughter Megan posted a link on her Facebook and wrote about the emotions behind the piece....."
(Excerpt) Read more at dailymail.co.uk ...
So the old Rocker gets out his bike
to make a ton before he takes his leave.
Up on the A1 by Scotch Corner
just like it used to be.
And as he flies -— tears in his eyes -—
his wind-whipped words echo the final take
and he hits the trunk road doing around 120
with no room left to brake.
And he was too old to Rock’n’Roll but he was too young to die.
No, you’re never too old to Rock’n’Roll if you’re too young to die.-Tull
There are strange things done in the midnight sun
By the men who moil for gold;
The Arctic trails have their secret tales
That would make your blood run cold;
The Northern Lights have seen queer sights,
But the queerest they ever did see
Was that night on the marge of Lake Lebarge
I cremated Sam McGee.
‘He excelled at attempting home improvement projects,...
My Dad wasn’t the drinking/smoking type...but he was a real character with a wonderful sense of humor & and wide variety of interests. This is very (eerily) similar to the obituary that I wrote when he died of cancer at 62.
It was ten years ago so was never a Facebook sensation. His friends and acquaintances (even the Funeral Director) loved it...some of the more staid family members were not quite so thrilled...LOL!
She wrote a great tribute; I’m sure he would love it.
that should not say telling lies, it should say discussing impossible things!
Dandy obit.
Makes me yearn for the end of June when me and 5 co-worker
pals head to Humboldt County for our annual emergency
salmon fishing trip.
The one who should be obeyed must win all the time.
He was a passenger in a car that ate a motorcycle yesterday.
Here is the obituary for my friend Lou. He was a Bucknell University professor and wrote the obit himself.
I saw Lou a few hours before he died. He walked into my store and for the first time ever, could not communicate his thoughts. He always wore cowboy boots, jeans and a denim vest. That day he shrugged his shoulders with a smile, turned and walked away and went home and died.
His obituary was read on Car Talk.
LEWISBURG - Louis J. Casimir Jr. bought the farm Thursday, Feb. 5, 2004, having lived more than twice as long as he had expected and probably three or four times as long as he deserved.
Although he was born into an impecunious family, in a backward and benighted part of the country at the beginning of the Great Depression, he never in his life suffered any real hardships.
Many of his childhood friends who weren’t killed or maimed in various wars became petty criminals, prostitutes, and/or Republicans.
He survived three years overseas in an infantry regiment in excellent health, then university for four years on the GI bill, and never thereafter had to do an honest day’s work.
He was loved by good women, had loyal friends, and all his children were healthy, handsome and bright.
For more than six decades, he smoked, drank and ate lots of animal fat, but never had a serious illness or injury.
His last wish was that everyone could be as lucky as he had been, even through his demise was probably iatrogenic.
He was preceded in death by his wife of 43 years, Judy.
He is survived by his brother Jack of Houston, Texas; and his children, Randall Kent of Brunswick, Ga., Louis John III (Trey) of Lewisburg, Thomas Bettis of Lewisburg and Edith Austin Wheat of Austin, Texas.
Lou was a daredevil: his last words were “Watch this!”
A memorial service and barbecue will be held on Labor Day at Lou’s place.
PS... The newspaper put a disclaimer on the bottom of Lou’s obituary as this is a conservative community!!!
A life well lived. We can all hope that our families such glowing things about us at the end.
I didn’t know Ted Kennedy was a fisherman.
“Their daughter.. was born “early”.. six months later”.
The daughter has a great sense of humor (probably got it from her Dad). I’m sure their sense of humor will help them with their loss. I loved the article, CW.
I think we all can relate to that. lol
Don Malcolm died way too young.
BUT By God, his sure sounds like a life well lived
R I P
Captain Donald Malcolm Jr.
Ahhh...I miss playing cribbage. Tried to teach the game to some younger friends, but they couldn't quite grasp it...If only they could log off playing stupid video games...
FMCDH(BITS)
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