[BJClinton]

Oh yeah, and I just *have* to repost the silliest headline of the year!

Balls-up leaves testicle cookers hanging (That is actually the headline)

[BJClinton]

Lemmneaux if you want on or off of the OFST ping list!

[theDentist]

Where is there a giant lizard banging on my front door?

[day10]

Two men died and went to Heaven. St. Peter greeted them, and said "I'm sorry, gentlemen, but your mansions aren't ready yet. Until they are, I can send you back to Earth as whatever you want to be."
"Great!" said the first guy, "I want to be an eagle soaring above beautiful scenery!"

"No problem," replied St. Peter, and POOF! The guy was gone. "And what do you want to be," St. Peter asked the other guy.

"I'd like to be one cool stud!" was the reply.

"Easy," replied St. Peter, and the other guy was gone.

After a few months, their mansions were finished, and St. Peter sent an angel to fetch them back. "You'll find them easily," he says, "One of them is soaring above the Grand Canyon, and the other one is on a snow tire somewhere in Detroit!"

[Fierce Allegiance]

Happy FRIDAY!

[Xenophobic Alien]

WOOHOO!


TGIF!

[Izzy Dunne]

Jeez, do a search willya?

This was Already Posted.

[Egon]

A guy walks into the local welfare office, marches straight up to the counter and says, "Hi! ... You know, I just HATE drawing welfare. I'd really rather have a job."

The social worker behind the counter says, "Your timing is excellent. We just got a job opening from a very wealthy old man who wants a chauffeur/bodyguard for his nymphomaniac daughter.

You'll have to drive around in his Mercedes, but he'll supply all of your clothes. Because of the long hours, meals will be provided. You'll be expected to escort her on her overseas holiday trips. You will have to satisfy her sexual urges. You'll have a two-bedroom apartment above the garage. The starting salary is $200,000 a year."

The guy says, "You're bulls****in' me!! "

To which the social worker says, "Yeah, well, you started it."

[Michael Goldsberry]

Bump for silliness! I'm already getting my butt kicked at work today.

More silliness, I say!

[day10]

I think I could use this:

[cripplecreek]

[Rummyfan]

Wow! Early start this morning! Let's get it started!!!

[Conspiracy Guy]

Is it Friday already?

[beyond the sea]

Here ...... for a couple of laughs:

****

"Get down on your knees...... count your blessings....... and thank God......... and blame everyone else (but me) under the sun." ---

Gov. Blanco

*****

I'm not using those yellow school buses........... I want me some fancy Greyhound buses." ---

Beggin' Nagin

[SoDak]

This is a first for some time. I'm actually up early enough before work to post a joke to the OFST.

How many Big XII students does it take to change a light bulb? Well...

At Kansas State it takes two. One to change the bulb and one more to explain how they did it every bit as well as any Big Ten or SEC school.

At Texas A&M it takes three. One to change the bulb, and two to phone a friend at Texas Tech and get instructions.

At Colorado it takes four. One to screw in the bulb, and three to figure out how to get high off the old one.

At Nebraska it takes five. One to change it, two to talk about how Tom Osborne would have done it, and two to throw the old bulb at Oklahoma students.

At Baylor it takes six. One to change it, two to mix the drinks, and three to find the perfect J. Crew outfit to wear for the occasion.

At OSU it takes seven, and each one gets credit for four semester hours for it.

At Kansas it takes eight. One to screw it in, and seven to discuss how much brighter it shines during basketball season.

At Oklahoma it takes ten. Two to figure out how to screw it in, two to buy a Sooners lamp, and six to phone a radio call-in show and talk about how John Blake is too stupid to do it.

At Texas it takes fifteen. One to screw in the bulb, two to buy the Skoal, and twelve to shout, "HOOK 'EM HORNS!!!"

At Missouri it takes 100. One to change it, 49 to talk about how they do it better than KU, and 50 who realize it's all a lie.

At Iowa State it takes 80,000. One to screw it in, and 79,999 to discuss how this will finally be the year they have a good football team.

At Texas Tech it takes none. There is no electricity in Lubbock.

[CSM]

Woo Hoo, top 500!

[Living Free in NH]

For his birthday, little Patrick asked for a 10-speed bicycle. His father said, "Son, we'd give you one, but the mortgage on this house is $80,000 & your mother just lost her job. There's no way we can afford it."

The next day the father saw little Patrick heading out the front door with a suitcase. So he asked, "Son, where are you going?" Little Patrick told him, "I was walking past your room last night I heard you telling mom you were pulling out. Then I heard her tell you to wait because she was coming too. And I'll be damned if I'm staying here by myself with an $80,000 mortgage & no bike!"

[cuz_it_aint_their_money]

Leave it to the Brits to come up with this:

http://www.boysstuff.co.uk/product.asp?id=12158&random=80516994&cid=29&subcat=&scid=

[YouPosting2Me]

Are you logged in?

[rockabyebaby]

Woooo hooooo! Got in under the first 50 posts!

[Brainhose]

The "World's Greatest Toilet"
It only costs $3,800! Get them while supplies last.
And yes, it's from Japan of course.

• Sleek, tankless, one-piece toilet with integrated Washlet seat
• New Cyclone Flushing system, no waiting for refill, no refill noise.
• Skirted styling with concealed trapway for easy cleaning
• Integrated Washlet features front and rear warm water washing, automatic air dryer and deodorizer
• SanaGloss: Super smooth, ion barrier glazing cleans your toilet bowl with every flush
• Automatic Operation: Air purifier, lid opens/closes and toilet flushes when sensor is activated
• Remote Control: The Neorest comes with a wireless remote control and all toilet and Washlet functions can be handled via the remote: motorized seat (up, down, temperature), water temperature, Cyclone flush, massage, oscillate, and change wand position.
• Three Year Limited Manufacturer Warranty (by Toto)