Posted on 08/02/2016 6:00:24 PM PDT by Auntie Mame
NEW YORKAll over America IKEA futons are groaning with the restless insomnia of journaliststossing, turning, cursing the impotence of their melatonin capsulesburdened with the future of the Republic. Long nights of torment, and then . . .
Morning resolve! Before theyve even microwaved their second Jimmy Dean Sausage Sandwich, they know that this will be the day of reckoning. They will fire up the Kia Sedona and take the long way to work, giving them more time to think about the epic 1,500 words that will make the difference between chaos and civilization.
Yes, they tell their wives, Its time for my Donald Trump is a Dickwad column.
. . .
. . . the Donald Trump voters have consistently told us why theyre voting for Trump, but it doesnt fit any of the stereotypes and so its never mentioned. Whats the first thing out of a Trump voters mouth when hes asked about it?
I like him because he says whats on his mind.
Hell say anything.
He doesnt sugar-coat it.
He says things no one else will say.
Its a political movement based on the First Amendment.
(Excerpt) Read more at takimag.com ...
I’m sure this piece will receive some type of award.
However, after scrolling thru it, faster & faster, l thought l & your average joe six pack voter might be better served with the clift notes version.
Please ping me with something on this topic with 25 words or less
Oh my aching sides! Funny and totally correct!
Generally speaking it was good, although I was less than impressed with this part:
“So Donald Trump is Human Luminol. He doesnt have any real opinions. He just seeps into an environment like a grievance-seeking gas. He finds whatever people are mad about and says I can fix it. He probably cant fix it, but hes talking about things that nobody else wants to fix.”
” First, stop with the psychoanalysis. Trump doesnt believe anything. Trump is like Luminol. Luminol is the chemical used on Forensic Files to find blood after the crime scene has already been scrubbed. You just spray Luminol all over the floor and walls, and if human blood has ever touched anything in the room, it will phosphoresce like a red-headed hobos nose after seven bottles of Night Train. So Donald Trump is Human Luminol. He doesnt have any real opinions. He just seeps into an environment like a grievance-seeking gas. He finds whatever people are mad about and says I can fix it. He probably cant fix it, but hes talking about things that nobody else wants to fix. He sees the blood on the floor.”
Best paragraph in the article!
I will vote for Trump because of the reasons you mentioned, he not only says what he thinks but says what most Americans think who do not have the courage to say so.
Donald Trump is what Americans used to be, ready to dance or fight, preferably dance but if need be Fight.
Economy wise we need to be cutting our own logs and making our own lumber, we need to be using our own natural resources.
We need to be buying our food from the american farmers, if we don`t they will be gone and then where will we be?
Import and export taxes will take caare of that problem.
Everything Trump talks about should make sense to any one except a dam socialist.
I will vote for Trump because of the reasons you mentioned, he not only says what he thinks but says what most Americans think who do not have the courage to say so.
Donald Trump is what Americans used to be, ready to dance or fight, preferably dance but if need be Fight.
Economy wise we need to be cutting our own logs and making our own lumber, we need to be using our own natural resources.
We need to be buying our food from the american farmers, if we don`t they will be gone and then where will we be?
Import and export taxes will take caare of that problem.
Everything Trump talks about should make sense to any one except a dam socialist.
It’s good to the last drop.
I’d like this on tap.
If taxi and bus drivers suddenly decided to disregard all traffic laws and drive any damn way they pleased, we'd ground the lot of them. If construction workers suddenly decided to forget about code and wire the building however they wanted, we'd fire them. But if journalists decide, as they have, to forget about reporting and start "making a difference" by manipulating, we give them Pulitzer prizes, or more accurately, they give them to themselves, a process quite as openly incestuous as the Academy Awards and just as phony.
The real tragedy is that the press who would otherwise chronicle has become so partisan it is now necessarily participatory, and you can't have it both ways. And the party line it has come to parrot is laid down by people who hate the country and the people who are in it. That isn't a potential danger anymore, it's reached a flashpoint and none of the people who could step back from the precipice even see it.
The issue is respect, respect on the part of the bicoastal elite who profess to be a new ruling class for the rest of us who who are angry because we are despised by them. Pray it takes place at the ballot box, because the alternatives are looking pretty stark.
Maybe you could read a paragraph a day. ; - )
This kind of writing makes me miss my mom. So often I would find something really great like this and call her on the phone and read it to her. This is one of those pieces that would be great to read out loud.
Can’t wait to Vote for this Magnificent Bastard!
He is who he is....not a bought established politician!
A free Thinker!
What a blessing we have been given....to choose our Nations future fate.
I pray Our Nation votes for Freedom of Thought....and American Industry.
Vote TRUMP!
We are very fortunate to have been born in this country.
Is this your by line on the piece?
No, I’m not Joe Bob Briggs. I wish I could write this well. Whoever Joe Bob Briggs is, he’s a fantastic writer.
I know exactly what you are saying. It’s easy to become discouraged.
The way I soothe myself is remembering that God is in control. All is well. That was one of my mother’s favorite sayings. (Thanks Mom.)
Try it. It works for me, maybe it will work for you.
>>>We need to be buying our food from the american farmers
Not burning it as lower grade fuel.
Joe Bob Briggs is the drive-in movie critic of Grapevine, Texas, currently resident in New York City, where his pop culture commentary appears in print, on television and at various dive bars that defy the modern world by allowing the smoking of cigars.
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