NYC Mayor Orders Bars to Serve Pregnant Women [semi-satire]

Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 15 May 2016 | John Semmens

[John Semmens]

New York City Mayor Bill de Blasio banned bars operating in the city from refusing to serve alcohol to pregnant women. This is despite virtually universal medical advice against the consumption of alcohol by expectant mothers.

The Mayor said he is "cognizant of the damage that might be done to an unborn child if its mother imbibes, but the possibility of harm is not a sufficient reason for a business establishment to discriminate against these women. Under New York's laws a woman has an unconstrained right to kill her unborn child if she so chooses. The less extreme option of merely damaging the child's health by consuming alcohol is also her prerogative."

De Blasio cautioned that his new edict "does not absolve bar owners from posting warnings about the dangers of birth defects from alcohol consumption by pregnant women, nor from being sued by any customers whose child may experience these defects. We are protecting the right of women to pursue happiness. We are not immunizing vendors from bearing the responsibility for the consequences to customers who consume their products."

if you missed any of this week's other semi-news/semi-satire posts you can find them at...

http://www.gopbriefingroom.com/index.php/topic,206549.0.html

[BwanaNdege]

The Mayor continued, “We have many, many under-employed Tort Lawyers in New York City. These people must be given the opportunity to keep up payments on their yachts and their homes in the Hamptons!”

“Also, Planned Parenthood is running out of excuses for murdering babies. A new epidemic of Fetal Alcohol Syndrome will remedy that shortage!”