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Locked on 03/31/2006 12:01:58 PM PST by Admin Moderator, reason:
Flamewar. |
Posted on 03/30/2006 7:42:22 AM PST by CardCarryingMember.VastRightWC
A local Ft. Collins man was charged with sexual assault and "domestic violence harrassment" after his wife complained to police that on numerous occasions in the past year she awoke at night to find him "having sex or oral sex" even though she had told him this seemed like rape to her. The husband also admitted to taking nude photos of her while she slept.
I know you asd Miss Manners, the penultimate Southern Belle.
You, my friend, are a true lady.
Well,
Considering all the other threads were way worse is said (and pictured)...it came off as a personal flack fest.
And it showed.
R9etb, you raise a fair question, and I'll answer without being flip. The answer is, no, of course not. There is never a legal obligation for a woman to spread her legs, and for a dude to "take" it when it's not otherwise offered is wrong.
That said, the marriage vows created an unshirkable moral obligation on both husband and wife to make sex available regularly (i.e, spread her legs). The reason is simple: If a man or woman is giving up having sex with anyone else in the world forever, they damn well be getting sex at home. For headaches, there is aspirin. For other problems, there is viagra. 'Nuf said.
This dude should have gotten the message: His wife didn't care to have sex with him (apparently - there is probably much to the story we don't know - but we can surmise there were problems). If she was on day 90 of her headache, the solution is to get the hell out because there are affectionate woman who do think enough of their men to provide what they need (and men do need sex and affection - it's not optional).
It's a risk, but a calculated one. One of three things will happen:
1) He will be alone, but better off because at least he isn't putting up with her sh!t.
2) He will hook up with someone who does want him, in which case he will be better off.
3) The wife will be on her knees, literally and figuratively, to get him back, in which case he is better off.
I'm no philosopher, but I speak from experience (see #3 above). Of course, getting the hell out should happen long before children come into the picture, or well after they are grown, but otherwise I stand by my assertions.
< /soapbox >
There wasn't enough space to post everyones name, Y'all have made my day. I love threads like this. Been reading all day long. Made me giggle like a school girl... : ) <<< me
This is what FR is all about!
they damn well better be getting sex at home
Sheesh! I damn well better proofread.
Just checked to see if you had been banned yet!
;-)
HUG!!!!!!
I believe that is called taking one for the team, not rape. ; )
Deep down in places you don't talk about at parties NEWS THREADS, you want me on that wall THREAD, you need me on that wall THREAD.
We use words like honor Dominatrix, code sex, loyalty pissant.
We use these words as the backbone of a life spent defending our right to laughter.
Actually, WE use them as a punchline too.....
I came back to read what I missed and my jaw hit the floor when I read that comment. That was about as low as it gets. I would love to call you a name right now, but I won't.
Obviously, you don't know anything about Max. He is a good and decent man and you have know f!@$^^%$# idea what you are talking about!
You posted to this thread as though you have some moral authority over people and then say something as crude and disgusting as that! What you thought PaulaB said pales in comparison to what you said to Max.
Take a nice long look in the mirror the next time you go flinging around criticism about other people.
Oh, and while you're at it, it's common courtesy to ping people to your comments when you talk about them. You should know that, or maybe you don't care. The rules apply only to everyone else.
If you want to criticize you better bring it better than this.
Ohhh, the real moral authority has arrived. :)
Never claimed or assumed to be, that's all you.
Sooooooo, to recap.......My wife can take my car and my money, but I can't have sex with her while she is alseep, Paul said so in the Bible, even though he was grumbly and didn't like women much. I can get an IPW doll, but it's not real.
OK, I think I am caught up now.
So you think it's "morally wrong" for the guy to act as he did. I trust you also agree it would be criminally wrong if the two people involved were not married to each other. So you're basically telling us that there's something about a marriage license that somehow turns this guy's actions from criminal to legal behavior....
That raises the obvious question: would you say that there's anything at all within a marriage with which government should get involved?
On the one hand, if you say government has no place in any activities between husband and wife.... Well, we've seen the results of that sort of logic over in the Islamic countries.
Of course I don't think you believe that -- I think you'd tell us that there are some things that should be treated as criminal acts, even within a marriage. For example, I think you'd probably say that it's criminally wrong for a man to beat his wife.
In that case, however, you've surrendered your "marriage makes it different" rationale that transforms this guy's behavior from sexual assualt to "wifely duty."
It's really a remarkable position to take.
Heard this in a movie once:
You're not paying a whore to have sex with you. You're paying a whore to leave afterward.
As good an explanation as any I've heard...
How dare you make assumptions like that? Who do you think you are?
It so happens that I have very little time as I work seven days a week, at least 12 hours a day, but still manage to read out of the Bible just about every night before I fall into an exhausted sleep. Not that I owe you any explanation.
I wish you holier-than thou, judgmental types could see yourselves as others see you.
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