Posted on 12/09/2018 12:51:48 PM PST by sodpoodle
In the words of Robin Williams,
Joke em if they can’t take a fork.
This was the plant that, at the time, made 80% of the “black boxes” for commercial jets. A crash had occurred in Texas and the government had brought the infinite loop tape to our plant as we had the best tools for getting signals off degraded tape in existence. A news chopper had been dispatched by one of the networks to get the story. Of course, the techs who worked on it were sworn to secrecy and the tape was never out of the sight of the government reps. So, none of us knew anything. But, there at the front gate was a reporter stopping every car that left and asking.
I was walking out behind a bizarre employee known to us as Earthquake. He had no internal governance whatsoever. It was amazing he could even be employed. I said to him, “Wouldn’t it be interesting if somebody told them the pilot’s voice could be heard saying, ‘It’s a UFO. My God, it’s shooting at us!”
Well, he drove out in front of me. The reporter stopped him. Suddenly she stepped back with her mouth hanging open. The cameraman dipped the camera down and peered around it with his eyes wide. They didn’t even stop me.
The next day, we were all hauled into the cafeteria and given a stern lecture. Everybody looked at me. I looked back with my most innocent expression and shrugged.
lol
Several items on that list would get you arrested the FIRST time it happened.
You invited other people’s children into a tent? On the sex offender list after your arrest for solicitation of children.
Creating safety hazards in a store repeatedly? Banned, after he was arrested for property damage. People fake slips by leaking meat juice on a floor, and this character supposedly did it with tomato juice from a bathroom?
All our dairy cows are lined up on either side of the long barn where fairgoers wandered through the middle of the barns on Sunday after church to see all the prize animals standing or laying in the straw.
We stuffed a pair of jeans with straw and waited patiently for a cow to lie down at which time we inserted the jeans underneath her rear end. We added a pair of boots, crooked the knee and waited. Beautifully, this time the cow sat on her tail such that when she'd try to swat flies the leg of our poor squished dummy would move as if struggling to get out.
It was perfect, looked real as hell, and the reactions of the unsuspecting "city slickers" was priceless.
Thanks for reminding me....I've not remembered in decades.
I did something similar in Home Depot - ran down the doorbell demonstration aisle and pressed one after another (was a kid then). No dessert but boy was that fun. Totally worth it.
I went into a clock store in Lugano, Switzerland. The clocks were all set to different times and the cuckoos were non-stop. Don’t know how the clerk to stand to work there.
I thought it was cute. I’ve never heard it. I’ll be forwarding to relatives. Thanks!
I used to say the same about folks working in casinos. Just like any job, I guess, you get used to it and don’t hear it anymore (except in your head when you’re at home).
Funny but Target doesn’t sell firearms.
My mom had spent the night with a relative so my wife and I went to her condo and did a tape outline of a body, then affixed some Police Line tape across the front door.
Long story short, she freaked out and so did her neighbors. I won a best Practical joke of the month contest on the local talk station
“11. October 3: Darted around the store suspiciously while loudly humming the `Mission Impossible’ theme.
LOL! The first time I heard the MI theme I had this sudden urge to own a Walther PPK.
Below there was a comment by a reader (apparently a female) saying that it wasn't funny, was playing to stereotypes, etc.
They later removed that comment.
A lot of your posts are very funny. Can’t help it if some people are walking around with a ___________ up their _______. Keep posting and ignore them.
Funneee...had my husband laughing so much...never seen it before...and bah humbug to those with no sense of humor
In your defense - I laughed and am now searching for, what I hope, your many other posts.
Totally worth it!
Not a fan of bathroom-related humor but found some of the antics funny. Especially fun when another poster tells a true humorous anecdote which we never have read otherwise. Thank you both. :)
Like another freeper said, sometimes I am that guy. Less, though, as I age and the effect of Jesus in my life takes deep root. As a freshman in college (1968), I once started a decent food fight by randomly flinging a large spoon full of mashed potatoes over the partition separating the dining room from the dish and food disposal area. Once the food fight was underway, I simply walked out the door and headed back to my dorm room. My work there was done.
Thanks for the humorous post. Don’t give in to the ankle biters.
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