Posted on 11/20/2015 3:13:54 PM PST by Domandred
My little brother’s baby was taken away from him last night, 11-18-2015, here in Cache County Utah. I’m writing this for all of my friends, family and community, in hopes that this issue gets out to the public and into the open. It is heart breaking and has apparently already affected a number of families here in Utah, because of a more recently passed Utah law.
A brief summary of the law is that a biological father, even listed as the father on the child’s birth certificate, does not have to sign and consent for his child to be adopted out. The mother can sign the child over, completely against the fathers will.
My brother Colby had his little girl taken away because of this law. Colby had been together with his girlfriend for over two years. He was with her all through the pregnancy. She was being pushed very strongly to adopt the baby out because the two were not yet married. Marriage was being discussed but would be further down the road. Colby was in the hospital when she had the baby, he never left her side or the baby’s side the entire time. He was a proud new Daddy, showing his new little girl off to all of us (Grandma, Grandpa, Brothers and Sisters.)
His girlfriend’s parents (I’m attempting to be respectful of privacy by leaving names out) were still pushing her to adopt the baby out, even threatening her. Her parents had a couple in their hometown (here in the valley) picked out for the baby to go to. They did not plan this to go through a typical adoption agency.
Colby and his girlfriend were being pressured to sign the baby over before leaving the hospital. Colby was completely against the adoption. His girlfriend was back and forth on her thoughts and unsure of the decision. The two talked and agreed to take the baby home. When it was time to leave the hospital, the two took their new little girl, who they named Kaylee Mae, to our parents’ home in Lewiston. There was a room already setup for little Kaylee Mae. Everything that was needed for the little one was all there and ready. Colby and his girlfriend had already done a lot of shopping for the baby, as did grandma and grandpa.
After a couple of days, the two decided together, to keep their little girl. The very next day, his girlfriend’s parents were upset and demanded that she go to their home and talk with them. Little Kaylee was left at home with Colby. Colby hadn’t left Kaylee’s side since she was born. He had already spent more time caring for her than her mother had. His girlfriend came back that evening, very upset and emotional, stating that she was going to sign the adoption papers that night.
Colby refused to sign, he was against the adoption. She left and signed the papers, leaving the baby with Colby. Since that night, Colby has had total care of his baby, his girlfriend not coming around at all. Colby planned on keeping custody of his Kaylee and started getting all the legal actions into place.
Colby has total support of his family: mom, dad, all four brothers and me, his only sister. His big brother Tyson and sister in law Kelsie, who have a new little one of their own, were proud to help Colby with some of the first baths, diaper changes and feedings, with me, our brothers and sister in laws, grandma and grandpa there willing to do whatever we could to help.
Grandma and Grandpa were 100% supportive, doing everything they could to help Colby with his new little girl. After the night his girlfriend left, she had never been back and took no more part in caring for the baby. Grandma was there every minute of every day and night to help. Even when it came time for Colby to fight to keep his baby, Grandma and Grandpa were there 100%.
Colby loves his little girl with all his heart. He has gone through absolute hell fighting to keep her and then losing her. He has pleaded with the couple to quit fighting him and just let him keep his baby. My whole family has been so involved and we are heart-broken. It is so hard for me to see my little brother so tore up and devastated.
My mom and dad are heart-broken and struggling to understand how this could’ve happened. They have invested in attorneys’ and spent numerous hours day and night along with Colby, trying to keep Colby’s baby, our Little Kaylee.
The final word came in last night, through law enforcement, that Colby had to turn his baby over to the couple that had been fighting to take her away from him. (As a side note: the adoptive couple hired a very expensive attorney- this same attorney has strong ties to this Utah law that was written and passed) According to Colby’s attorneys’- this adoption was ran through very secretively and quickly through the system- it was very shady.
Colby is an exceptional young man and an amazing father. He has never drank, smoked, used drugs, he has no criminal history, I don’t think he has even had so much as a speeding ticket. Our family is very close and would do anything for one another.
We feel that it is very important for Colby’s and Kaylee’s story to get out. Hopefully shedding some light on this law will help keep other families from going through this same tragedy that ours has. Maybe getting it out there will help to get it changed.
Thanks to all who have offered love and support. Our family asks for your thoughts and prayers for Colby, our family and the other families going through similar situations.
Sincere thanks for taking the time to read this
Jamie Nielsen and Family
*update: My family is extremely grateful for all the love and support we have already received these last few hours. We are overwhelmed with gratitude, we didn't expect this type of response. This world truly is full of love and kindness. Thank you all.
If any would like to help further, a GoFundMe account has been set up to help with attorney costs to try and get little Kaylee Mae home. Once again, thank you.
https://www.gofundme.com/g8b7btmk
I did find it interesting enough to repost here for discussion.
I am the adoptive mother of four and in the states my children were from bio Dad had to sign off.
+++++++++++++++
That said, my personal opinion is that fathers should have no rights unless married to mom. Otherwise, leave it zipped.
>>That said, my personal opinion is that fathers should have no rights unless married to mom. Otherwise, leave it zipped.<<
Do you also agree that said that he doesn’t have to pay child support unless he is married?
..That said, my personal opinion is that fathers should have no rights unless married to mom. Otherwise, leave it zipped...
uh no rights just obligations, is that ok with you? what about mama, should she have kept her dress on, zipped or otherwise.
Until it comes to child support, then they have “responsibilities.”
Bullfeathers.
Rights and responsibility go hand in hand. No rights - no responsibility.
(My opinion is that they SHOULD have both - rights and responsibilities)
If true, this absolutely sucks.
I wonder how much money was involved ?
Shouldn’t the dad get first rights to full custody of their own child before strangers?
What Utah Laws says....
—
The four requirements in Utah adoption law
Utah’s law has four steps that unwed biological fathers must follow before a birth mother consents to an adoption in order to intervene:
File a paternity petition in court.
File a sworn affidavit in court stating he is able and willing to have full custody of the child, detailing child care plans and agreeing to a court order of support and payment of pregnancy and birth-related expenses.
File a notice of commencement of a paternity action with the state vital statistics registrar.
Show, unless he was unaware of the pregnancy until birth, proof he offered to pay or paid pregnancy and birth-related expenses.
If you do some research I think you’ll find that this is a racket run in the State of Utah, backed by law and facilitated by certain elements within a religious sect.
Last I read, somebody was making a big tado about it and a lawsuit was emerging, but I never followed up.
No rights means no child support...and you can damned well bet if he signed first and she changed her mind he’d be paying support till the child was 18.
Maybe you should just say unmarried parents automatically lose their rights and the children go to the State. That way both genders are treated equally.
I find Colby’s story hard to believe here. So I look up some basics. See post 8.
Basically Colby needs to get an attorney. Stat.
Should. I mean if the mother died in childbirth there wouldn’t be a question. In this case she signed away her rights, she’s done. She is no longer legally the mother.
This should be a fairly easy court case, but sounds like it was legal in Utah.
why whine on Facebook. Get a lawyer asap.
How does a state get away with a law that negates ONLY the father’s parental rights?
I’m with you...no different than her going to a sperm bank. Oh well.
If the mother wants to kill the baby during the first 9 months of life, she doesn’t need the father’s consent. It’s a mixed-up world.
If this kid is so exceptional, why didn’t he marry the baby’s mother?
Yea looks like women from around the country were coming to Utah and putting their children up for adoption because Utah didn’t need the father’s consent.
They changed the law last year so the mother had to be a resident of Utah for 90 days. That didn’t help in this case because they already were Utah residents.
This law was probably passed to stop men from having to consent because the Mormon religion got into trouble a couple of years ago with their adoption practices..
A man was in the military and away overseas...his wife stayed in back in the states...she was pregnant but didn’t want the baby...
she didn’t tell her husband she was pregnant but went to the Mormons to give her child up when he or she was born...the Mormons told her not to tell him..
When the baby was born and adopted out to a “good” Mormon family the man came back and a friend told him that he was a father...he tried to get his child since he had not sign away his parental rights...he had to sue for his child but I think he finally did get him or her...but it was a long fight..
however the whole evil doings of the Mormon adoption services were exposed and they didn’t like it..now this law...
This one isn’t passing the smell test.
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