This reality show about married swingers is crazy, but not for the reason you think

www.washingtonpost.com ^ | 3/23/15 | Emily Yhar

[armydawg505]

A&E’s “Neighbors With Benefits,” a series that debuted Sunday night, opens with a truly hilarious scene. The camera reveals a sunny, idyllic neighborhood with a couple holding hands. There’s a shot of an American flag, a church and then a bunch of crosses. Someone actually yells, “Hidey ho, neighbor!” It’s suburban bliss. Inside one of the beautiful homes, a sweet middle-aged real estate agent shows a young married couple around the rooms, pointing out the large master bedroom.

The wife turns to the agent: “Have you heard about the rumors of this neighborhood?” she giggles. “That there’s wild neighborhood parties all the time?”

The agent looks aghast. “No,” she says. “This is a great family neighborhood. We’ve got lots of kids. I haven’t heard anything about that.”

OH REALLY? Well, the real estate agent is extremely out of the loop. Because as we learn as the soft music in the background suddenly stops, this unnamed neighborhood (which you can learn with a quick Google search is outside of Cincinnati) is famous for being chock-full of swingers. Yes, those married couples that seem like just your average suburban moms and dads — until you learn that in their free time, they enjoy hosting parties where they all get drunk and swap partners for the night.

[armydawg505]

If you ever want to see a clinical type example of how the most unhappy, lost souls try to cover their despair and latch onto anything they believe will relive their deep insecurities and unhappiness, watch this show. The first half was all smiles and laughs but even by the end of the first hour, serious problems were already arising. Its obvious they all have to get drunk to have their fun, they try to avoid any emotional ties with their most recent sex partner, a la prostitutes and none of it works. Aside from all of that, how does any real man allow his wife to be bedded by various men every weekend? And how do they allow themselves to be on television where their kids, parents and employers can show their appreciation as well? They are all on the road to personal disaster.

[buffaloguy]

I knew some kids who grew up in swinging households.
The destruction was unbelievable. Everyone of those kids ended up with serious problems.

Man, don’t do this.

[yefragetuwrabrumuy]

[GeronL]

More disgusting people on TV. Normals need not apply.

[dfwgator]

Nice “Anthony Davis” eyebrows there.

[Darksheare]

Lahrg the Cromag.

[Bloody Sam Roberts]

(which you can learn with a quick Google search is outside of Cincinnati)

College Hill? Finneytown? Hartwell? Inquiring minds want to know!

[StoneWall Brigade]

Yikes

[WKUHilltopper]

Welcome to Chlamydia Acres.

[afraidfortherepublic]

When I first got cable TV my daughter told me that I’d LOVE the programming on A & E. And I did. Lots of historical and artistic programs. Sometime back in the early 2000s, they switched to a “reality” format, and it’s been downhill ever since. I never watch anything on that channel nowadays.

In fact, I learned from a distant relative (who worked as an instructor in the New Mexico State prison) that A & E is one channel that was forbidden in the prison because of the content of many of their shows.

[Gay State Conservative]

As approved by the American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers

[the_individual2014]

I would rather touch a hairy woman from the deep south then touch that, yuck.

[Quality_Not_Quantity]

Welcome to Chlamydia Acres.

Coffee. Laughed. Out. Of. Nose. Funny.

[Buckeye McFrog]

I expect to look out my window and start seeing pillars of salt any day now...

[Buckeye McFrog]

The only entertaining television program about swingers was the episode of All in the Family where Edith unwittingly signed herself and Archie up to swing with them.

[Snickering Hound]

[martin_fierro]

*guffaw*

[tumblindice]

Call us.

[equaviator]

“The only entertaining television program about swingers was the episode of All in the Family where Edith unwittingly signed herself and Archie up to swing with them.”

I am Archie Bunker. I’m very naïve when it comes to the GLBT-Swinging “culture” and lifestyles.