Posted on 10/11/2013 5:46:07 AM PDT by Lucky9teen
The stock answer is: “Are you logged in?”
Look for this on the top of the column:
Brevity: Headers | « Text »
Click.
That fixed it! Thank you, Pan-Yan.
LOL, yeah, but I was taking a shower....
Now that’s funny!
If you can find any that haven’t been aborted.
The hunnert mile per hour goat
Ole and Sven are out hunting up nort der in Minniesota, and as they are walking along they come upon a huge hole in the ground.
They approach it and are amazed at the size of it.
The Ole says, “Wow, that’s some hole; I can’t even see the bottom. I wonder how deep it is!”
Sven says,” I don’t know. Let’s throw somethin’ down there, listen and see how long it takes to hit bottom.”
Ole says, “Hey, there’s an old car transmission laying over there. Give me a hand, we’ll throw it in and see.”
So they pick it up and carry it over and count one, two, three and heave it in the hole. They are standing there listening, looking over the edge, when they hear a rustling behind them. As they turn around, they see a goat come crashing through the underbrush, run up to the hole and, without hesitation, jump in headfirst.
While they are standing there staring at each other in amazement, peering into the hole, trying to figure out what that was all about, an old farmer saunters up.
“Say there,” says the farmer, “you fellers didn’t happen to see my goat around here anywhere, did you?”
Ole says, “Funny you should ask, but we were just standing here a minute ago and a goat came running out of the bushes doin’ bout a hunnert miles an hour and jumped headfirst into this here hole!”
The old farmer said, “Naw, that’s impossible! I had him chained to an old car transmission.”
Lie Detector Robot
The truth will always prevail!!
A father buys a lie detector robot that slaps people when they lie.
He decides to test it out at dinner one night.
The father asks his son what he did that afternoon.
The son says, “I did some schoolwork.” The robot slaps the son.
The son says, “Ok, Ok. I was at a friend’s house watching movies.”
Dad asks, “What movie did you watch?”
Son says, “Toy Story.” The robot slaps the son.
Son says, “Ok, Ok, we were watching porn.”
Dad says, “What? At your age I didn’t even know what porn was.”
The robot slaps the father.
Mom laughs and says, “Well, he certainly is your son.”
The robot slaps the mother.
Robot for sale.
that’s great
You Are a Hard Boiled Egg |
You can be a bit stubborn at times, and your determination has only paid off for you. You are straight with people, and you expect them to be straight with you in return. You are very no nonsense. You don't have time for pettiness or drama. |
(I should note that, while I might be hard-boiled, I like over-easy the best, Lucky!)
Unfortunately, the photo is incomplete. I’m off camera to the right, starkers, chasing her.
21st Century Schizoid Egg?
Sure was.
Poached egg.
After reading your egg description, I’m probably scrambled.
You Are a Hard Boiled Egg |
You can be a bit stubborn at times, and your determination has only paid off for you. You are straight with people, and you expect them to be straight with you in return. You are very no nonsense. You don't have time for pettiness or drama. |
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