Free Republic
Browse · Search
Bloggers & Personal
Topics · Post Article

Skip to comments.

Women Who Humiliate Their Husbands
Had Enough Therapy? ^ | 2-1-2015 | Stuart Schneiderman

Posted on 02/02/2015 4:42:01 AM PST by servo1969

Somehow or other the word “feminism” never enters these articles, but where do you imagine that the modern habit of demeaning, degrading and ridiculing men comes from?

We are not talking about something that occurs behind closed doors. Being contemptuous of men, making them look like fools has become the new, modern way for women to attack men.

One might say that the assaults men commit against women are far more serious. One would probably be right. And yet, life is a two-way street and the feminist habit of assaulting men with derisive remarks must produce a hostile cultural environment.

To the feminist mindset men are chronically misogynist. Women who mock said men are merely defending themselves.

The men who are subjected to this form of emotional abuse—why do we not consider it abuse when it is inflicted by a woman on a man?—sometimes lash out in anger. Sometimes, they run out and cheat. Often, they simply pack up and leave.

All things considered, no man can lash out at a woman, physically or verbally. The culture is so hypersensitive to the incidence of male-on-female violence that the least hostile remark by a man will be grounds for indictment.

Since men are no longer allowed to get angry, more and more of them leave.

If you are asking yourselves where America’s absent fathers are, and if you note that a large number of children grow up without a father in the home, you might consider the off chance that some of these emotionally abusive wives have driven their husbands off.

And yet, ironically, these wives are ridiculing their husbands for not being very good… housewives.

It’s the modern feminist’s way of keeping her husband out of the kitchen. If you were confused by feminism before…

Aside from the fact that feminism has made it open season on men, these forms of emotional abuse are ways for women to validate the wonderful work they do in the home.

They are saying that their work is so difficult that no man can do it well.

Call it self-affirmation at someone else’s expense.

Heaven forfend, but enterprising young single women have occasionally tried to exploit the situation. One shudders to think it but some young women are not above poaching other women’s husbands. If they are as clever as I think they are, they do not do it by practicing the lessons they read in Cosmo and they do not do it by exposing a little more cleavage or hiking up their skirts a couple of extra inches.

The key to a man’s heart is not through his stomach, but through his pride.

Are you a woman who wants to poach another woman’s husband? Try telling him this: If you were my husband I would never let you do the laundry.

Game. Set. Match.

Why has this topic reared its head?

It seems that Chicago Bears quarterback Jay Cutler sent a text to his wife, one Kristin Cavallari in which he bemoaned his difficulties taking care of their children in her absence.

Apparently, this wealthy young celebrity couple never heard of Nannies.

Cavallari shared Cutler’s text with the world via Instagram. Ashley McGuire of the New York Post then reported it.

How much do you want to bet that Cutler risks being seriously mocked in the locker room once the new season arrives? How will this little problem affect his ability to lead his team’s offense? How many women will be happy to console the dejected QB?

The problem will not be that Cutler was overwhelmed by young children, but that he allowed his wife to make him look like a fool in public.

McGuire points out that it has become acceptable for women to make a mockery of their husbands:

It’s somehow become culturally acceptable for wives to mock their husbands, and this is bad.

Men don’t like to be mocked. Neither do women, but I rarely see a husband mock his wife, especially when it comes to being a mother. It’s a sort of sacrosanct territory that a man knows better than to stomp on.

And yet I see women mock their husbands all the time. And I don’t mean tease. I mean derisively mock and shame, to their face and behind their back.

Some women will say here—I know it because I hear it all the time—that they limit their derision to lunch with their girlfriends. Not only is this improbable but women are far less successful at hiding their contempt than they think. If a woman feels it and thinks it, her husband knows. It’s like the man who is cheating on his wife but who insists that she does not know. Don't bet your marriage on her ignorance.

McGuire remarks that one consequence of this new cultural attitude is that more and more children are being brought up without fathers. This despite the fact that some men put up with the abuse and stay in their marriages, regardless.

McGuire explains:

I’m not the first and I certainly won’t be the last person to say that there is a “fatherhood crisis” in America. A third of American children are now growing up without their dad in the home.

And while there are promising signs that those fathers that do stay with their children are becoming more involved in their lives or at least want to be, this is still an area that needs improvement in American society.

But I can tell you one way that women can ensure that men won’t help more with their kids: Mocking them when they falter. Posting their “please help” moment of desperation for all to see.

To sustain her argument McGuire linked to an article from the Daily Mail. The article, by Frances Childs, dates to 2011. It shows that the problem McGuire identified had previously been identified.

As Childs described it:

Sophie pours another glass of wine. Shaking her head, she sighs heavily. ‘He’s such an idiot. I can’t leave him alone for five seconds. God knows what sort of mess I’ll get home to tonight.’

We all nod sympathetically. ‘Mine practically blew the microwave up last time I ventured out for the evening. He’s so useless,’ says Lisa, pulling a face.

She isn’t talking about her monosyllabic teenage son — she’d never be so rude about him. In fact, although the lad has been twice suspended from school and rarely logs off his incessant computer gaming, Lisa never ceases to boast about his incredible talents and intellect. It’s her husband of 17 years she’s roundly and publicly criticising.

Childs continued:

Our husbands’ sins range from never emptying the dishwasher to being emotional retards who are criminally incompetent at childcare and let our homes go to rack and ruin through lack of interest in DIY.

And I know we are far from alone. Get any group of women together and you can be sure they’ll talk about their husbands — and it will rarely be complimentary.

It’s become so commonplace to run down our spouses that Sally Bercow, publicity-mad wife of the Speaker of the Commons, felt totally at ease painting her husband John as a henpecked domestic drudge on national television.

Gleefully informing her housemates on the trash TV programme Big Brother that she makes John mop the kitchen floor and empty the dishwasher while she has a cup of tea, she appeared to think that belittling her spouse somehow made her look interesting.

I can’t in a million years imagine men talking about us with such vindictive nastiness. But belittling your husband has become not just acceptable but even de rigueur. And what’s worse, if you don’t participate in husband-bashing, you’re often cold-shouldered; it’s as if you’re a disappointment to the sisterhood, a sad little wifey.

The worst part, Childs avers, is that women have gotten into the habit of demeaning their husbands in front of their children:

More than once, I’ve seen mothers and children in cahoots, exchanging raised eyebrows over yet another ‘job’ that Daddy hasn’t done. In sharing tales about men’s incompetence, women are coming dangerously close to normalising a corrosive and lasting disrespect for fathers that can only have devastating consequences.

Research carried out by the University of Kent last year demonstrated that by the age of eight boys believed girls were better behaved and more successful than they were. Surely these negative opinions of their gender are down to boys growing up in a culture that routinely derides and ridicules masculinity.

As we know, slut-shaming is a terrible, terrible problem. Shaming one's husband, no problem at all.

Another victory for feminism!


TOPICS: Chit/Chat; Health/Medicine; Religion; Society
KEYWORDS: genderwars
Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first previous 1-20 ... 61-8081-100101-120 ... 161-162 next last
To: Irenic
Call me a chauvinist, but I don't like to ask my wife to do things that are particularly heavy - like mowing the lawn.

I'm sure that she could do it (if she could get the mower started, it pulls pretty hard) but if I can do it, I don't like to ask.

I run the chain saw and hedge clippers to trim back the bushes and trees, she does the flower gardens. She's got a much better eye for that sort of thing... I look at flowers and think "Pretty". She looks at them and says "Well, this color goes better with that, and this will look better when it grows in..." and so on.

Truly, as it sounds like with your husband, it's a complementary relationship. 'Tis why we work so well together. :-)

81 posted on 02/02/2015 7:19:46 AM PST by wbill
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 65 | View Replies]

To: Night Hides Not

>>She brought up the “D” word, dropping hints that she knows other men find her attractive.<<

If that were my wife......I’d promptly hit the eject button!


82 posted on 02/02/2015 7:22:53 AM PST by servantboy777
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 75 | View Replies]

To: wbill
I run the chain saw and hedge clippers to trim back the bushes and trees, she does the flower gardens. She's got a much better eye for that sort of thing... I look at flowers and think "Pretty".

That puts you one up on me. I see green, and think "Weed. Must destroy." and I see purple and I think "Flower. Must avoid." Sometimes the flowers are green and the weeds are purple.
83 posted on 02/02/2015 7:23:46 AM PST by Dr. Sivana (There is no salvation in politics)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 81 | View Replies]

To: Night Hides Not

LOL!

Yeah, as far as I’m concerned that word should never be brought up by a spouse unless divorce is precisely what he/she wants. Don’t even go there.


84 posted on 02/02/2015 7:24:45 AM PST by CatherineofAragon ((Support Christian white males---the architects of the jewel known as Western Civilization.))
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 75 | View Replies]

To: goodnesswins

I cant believe how well it is written. Line after line of great dialogue that flows effortlessly. The characters seem very real.


85 posted on 02/02/2015 7:27:30 AM PST by HereInTheHeartland (Pants up; don't loot)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 74 | View Replies]

To: servo1969

bfl


86 posted on 02/02/2015 7:27:41 AM PST by Doomonyou (Let them eat Lead.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Colonel_Flagg; C. Edmund Wright
You're both right. Generally, men are portrayed as dolts. And Super Bowl 2015 was a great exception!

These Super Bowl ads made this Dad cry (Toyota, Nissan and Unilever)

87 posted on 02/02/2015 7:32:05 AM PST by Servant of the Cross (the Truth will set you free)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 72 | View Replies]

To: C. Edmund Wright
Yep, and then there’s the 12 year old black kid from Detroit who’s going to “major in political science, get a law degree, then come back to Detroit and boost the economy” - because as we know, political science and a law degree teaches one so much about economics.

Most people who "boost the economy" aren't experts in economics. They're plumbers, or electricians, or engineers, or merchants, or ... neither a political science degree, nor a law degree, nor even an economics degree are particularly useful in these pursuits.

88 posted on 02/02/2015 7:32:50 AM PST by NorthMountain
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 7 | View Replies]

To: Servant of the Cross

As it turned out, I missed the first quarter, and saw the rest of the game at an Oyster Bar - so I missed many commercials and could not hear the nuances in others.

Amazing there were multiple ads like this. Someone on Madison Avenue has wised up.


89 posted on 02/02/2015 7:35:57 AM PST by C. Edmund Wright (www.FireKarlRove.com NOW)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 87 | View Replies]

To: Servant of the Cross

Actually, I don’t like the Dove Commercial really - it was pro dad, and it was fine - but it was all the squishy dad stuff (which is part of the gig) - but none of the real manly stuff (also part of the gig) - which is what I liked about Nissan and Toyota spots - CLEARLY taking aim at Subaru.


90 posted on 02/02/2015 7:44:37 AM PST by C. Edmund Wright (www.FireKarlRove.com NOW)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 87 | View Replies]

To: PapaBear3625

I tend to agree with you. If a woman is treating a man in a contemptuous way she has no respect for him and basically does not love/like him very much. Its just a bad match.

Same goes for men. A man who disrespects his wife does not love/like her.

I don’t buy into all this cultural psycho babble. Women are not that complicated. I are one. LOL!


91 posted on 02/02/2015 7:46:25 AM PST by Georgia Girl 2 (The only purpose o f a pistol is to fight your way back to the rifle you should never have dropped.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 4 | View Replies]

To: C. Edmund Wright

“And one way women demean men is in advertising.....every white dude on a commercial is a dolt - unless he’s a feminized lib hipster type”

You nailed it. Not to mention the racial aspect of the commercials where the black guy is always depicted as the college intellectual......while the advertising world can’t find white guys for their commercials with beautiful white women.


92 posted on 02/02/2015 7:51:31 AM PST by kenmcg
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 2 | View Replies]

To: Bigg Red

“Also, this assault on men and maleness has really undermined the sense of self that boys have. Over the course of my teaching career, I saw an entirely different type of boy emerge, a boy greatly diminished by the constant “Girls can do anything” garbage.”

I’m 52 and have worked for a number of younger couples in my plumbing work.

I simply cannot believe how utterly emasculated many younger guys are and utterly useless with mechanical things. It’s almost as though they have been bred this way. I’ve met my share of guys that were simply not mechanically inclined in my generation. However, it didn’t take away from their masculinity. This is something entirely different now.

I do better dealing with the wives and girlfriends. They listen and are willing to understand what you are trying to tell them.

I guess I’m just old. LOL


93 posted on 02/02/2015 7:55:05 AM PST by headstamp 2
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 57 | View Replies]

To: C. Edmund Wright
True dat. It is Madison Avenue after all. There is probably some ulterior motive to transition to a 'dad' like this in the future ...


94 posted on 02/02/2015 7:55:59 AM PST by Servant of the Cross (the Truth will set you free)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 90 | View Replies]

To: kenmcg

Lowes....the black housewife and the white delivery dude with the washer dryer....Lowes...the black couple and the white guys carrying the old carpet out....Cadillac...the yuppie black couple and the white hotel porter.....

and on and on...you know, just like real life...


95 posted on 02/02/2015 8:06:13 AM PST by C. Edmund Wright (www.FireKarlRove.com NOW)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 92 | View Replies]

To: servo1969

There’s a lot right about this article. There have been studies with vast numbers of people to document what men and women generally thought was most important in a relationship. For women it was “love;” for men, “respect” was at the top of the list. This should not be surprising, if we listen to the Creator’s message:

Eph 5:25 “Husbands, LOVE your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her...33 However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must RESPECT her husband.”

These are not “if he/she earns it first” commands. These are what each sex needs from each other at a basic level. It’s not enough for a man to “feel” love without showing it, just as it’s not enough for a woman to “love” a man they way she wants him to love her. Without respect in her tone and actions, publicly and privately, she is denying his manhood.

People who are oblivious to these fundamental imperatives have marriages that are already heading for the rocks, even if they don’t know it yet. I speak from experience. After 30+ years of marriage, we’ve just about figured this much out.


96 posted on 02/02/2015 8:06:37 AM PST by mikeus_maximus
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: wbill

Truly, as it sounds like with your husband, it's a complementary relationship. 'Tis why we work so well together. :-)

Indeed! Once upon a time my husband complained that it made him feel like a horses arse because I insisted on mowing and doing the yard work. I just explained to him how much I love doing it and that I would be very disappointed if I wasn't able to do it. He's gotten over his worries. :) Come on springtime!!!

97 posted on 02/02/2015 8:08:03 AM PST by Irenic (The pencil sharpener and Elmer's glue is put away-- we've lost the red wheelbarrow)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 81 | View Replies]

To: CatherineofAragon

I’m not his mother—he lives with her, I’m his father.

And he’s going on 17 soon.

He’s pretty much from observation (divorce #1, my likely divorce #2) come to a M.G.T.O.W (Men Going Their Own Way) point of view. I’m merely trying to reinforce what he already knows.

He has no desire to be in my position: married to a 2nd wife with 2 kids who is going to move on to greener passages. This country favors wives whoring it up (like the current wife, who has cheated I-can’t-remember-how-many times—I should use a spreadsheet), divorcing, getting child support (in reality, tax free alimony), then getting a new man.

The studies that say that both spouses are worse off after a divorce... not true if the woman remarries or gets a sugar daddy and gets bucket loads of “child support” from the ex- sucker.

I’m sending in my passport renewal this week, with the end goal of possibly joining up with the Kurds to fight against ISIS, so that if the wife leaves, I can vote with my feet against the system.

Should the current “wife” decide to break up the family for greener pastures, I will take a few thousand in cash with me, body armor & carrier, boots, Russian scopes, etc, and leave nothing behind but debt. I figure I’ll fight for a few months, kill some ISIS terrorists, then eventually get killed.


98 posted on 02/02/2015 8:10:17 AM PST by baltimorepoet
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 73 | View Replies]

To: servo1969

This reminds me of an old 45 year old cartoon.
A man and woman walking down the street get held up by a thug with a gun. The man’s hands go into the air.
The wife slugs the crook with her purse very hard, and he drops his gun, and the man says..

“My God Ethel, Can’t I take you anywhere without you embarrassing me in public?”


99 posted on 02/02/2015 8:24:03 AM PST by Ruy Dias de Bivar
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: baltimorepoet

Wow. Just when I think I’ve seen or read it all ....


100 posted on 02/02/2015 8:28:59 AM PST by stellaluna
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 98 | View Replies]


Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first previous 1-20 ... 61-8081-100101-120 ... 161-162 next last

Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.

Free Republic
Browse · Search
Bloggers & Personal
Topics · Post Article

FreeRepublic, LLC, PO BOX 9771, FRESNO, CA 93794
FreeRepublic.com is powered by software copyright 2000-2008 John Robinson