prolly doesn't even believe in GodThe grandparents were devout Catholic and as such, this would be out of the question. Not just for them but the rest of the family who still follows the faith. It must be done at a funeral Mass in church.
If an actual Funeral Mass we may assume she was prominent in her parish, so, yes; scandal as defined by the Church.
Your lifestyle has unforeseen consequences.
My mother's church had a policy against videotaping in their venue. However, they did send the same pastor to conduct the service at the funeral home. Their choice.
Unlike the fruitcake, I respect freedom of religion for everybody, not just special snowflakes who claim the most tender feelings. I'm sure the family could have arranged for him to sing at a funeral lunch or alternative family gathering if it was so important to him.
I attended a wedding reception for a couple at a church who did not have a ring exchange as part of their service. They didn't whine about it, but just moved it to their reception at a different venue after.
Unlike the featured fruitcake, I don't see it as my place to stand on a pedestal to criticize other religions for what they may or may not allow at funerals or weddings conducted at their venues.
Don't like the rules? Arrange for your 15 minutes of fame at a different time and/or venue. Don't expect everyone to cater to your feelings.
My grandmother had a friend who wrote in her will that at her funeral she wanted Nat King Cole’s “Rambling Rose” to be played.
Her family got into a big fight with the Church, which refused to play it because it was non-liturgical music.
They can and do say no to things like this all the time.
prolly doesn't even believe in God