[Mrs. Don-o]

Well, nobody has a right to "order" miracles. They are gratuitous acts of God, not produced on demand, and by no means, as you seem to suppose, a clerical monopoly. And you're saying that if they aren't done by bishops, they're not worth your investigation? Really?

This is the first time I've ever heard of the Boogieman Miracle Criteria. An innovative interpretation, to say the least.

St. Catherine of Siena, pray for us.

[Boogieman]

Nope, you are misunderstanding me again. I really tire of having to keep explaining my points to you over and over because you misconstrue them. Are you doing it deliberately?

Let’s try again. Your bishops claim to be successors to the apostles, and claim the authority of that office. The office of apostle carried with it certain gifts, namely the ability to perform all manner of miracles, even raising the dead. If they truly hold such an office, then they must also possess those gifts. If there is no evidence that they do, then they have impeached their own testimony, and I really don’t need to bother delving in to the rest of your church’s claims of miracles, because they would have already failed the most basic test I can imagine.

Similarly, take for example, David Koresh, who claimed to be the second coming of Christ. If that were really true, he would not have been able to be killed by mortal men. Since he was, he impeached his own testimony and I don’t need to investigate the rest of his claims before I conclude they are likely a bunch of hogwash.