LOL, I am sure Mary and Joseph BOTH WANTED to "do it" and had God's blessing.
Joseph: Mary; are you asleep?
Mary: You bozo; you KNOW I have to do my prayers.
Joseph: I was just wondering if....
Mary: You hornytoad; you KNOW I have had this HEADACHE for nigh unto these 12 years or so!
Joseph: A fella can HOPE eternally; can't he?
Mary: Hope all you want; you ain't gettin' it: I HAVE to remain a VIRGIN for my FOLLOWERS!!
Joseph: What 'followers'?
Mary: The ones who will be bombarding me forEVER with their heartfelt requests!!!
Joseph: I may as well be dead...
Mary: What did you just mumble? I ain't DEAD; just FRIGID. Now roll OVER and go to sleep.
Mary: Son? are You listening?? I've got a bunch more good, Catholic prayers for you to deal with. Ready?
Your rant is tacky, sophomoric at best.
Mary and Joseph were not your typical married couple.