Posted on 11/11/2014 8:56:22 PM PST by Salvation
BFL
It reminded me of the love dare from the movie Fireproof.
bkmk
Thank you for sharing the excellent video.
There are days like that. But there is something about a hug. Hard to be angry when you are hugging.
Thank you for the flag.
I have to admit that I did not watch the entire video, which I found too much like a soap-opera, but reading this essay was very good.
My marriage is solid, but it is certainly good to be reminded by something like this:
What if we decided –because it is a decision– to remember more the good, and to forgive and forget – at least in so far as it is possible– the bad. What if that first spark of love, if fanned each day with tender care, could truly become an eternal flame?
***
In September I went to a two day seminar on marital mediation to train me to work with couples who are having trouble but want to stay married. I’ll go again the next time this presenter has it. It was great but only showed me how much I need to learn. I’ve been a divorce lawyer since 1980. I don’t file divorce petitions anymore and only deal with post separation issues and mediation.
I have to agree with you. Went through it myself. I would not continue in a marriage with a man who would beat my children or me.
Now my eldest is in a bad situation, he still loves his wife, but she is addicted to a anti-depression drug and Xanax and is not mentally stable. She does not remember giving out private info on FB through MP to a child sex pred, just short of their home address. They have a 13 year old son, my only grandson. Son took him and ran after reading that. But it was not just that, she was reacting to the drugs and making life miserable for my grandson. Her special educational level is less than his normal education level at 13.
She refuses to recognize she is an addict, and has mental issues from being abused by her dad’s fist and a boyfriend who nearly killed her. Until she goes to Rehab and sees a shrink she should not be allowed any thing but supervised visits. She has run off to her drug dealer with my grandson when he was to young to remember it. History is just repeating itself this time with prescription drugs that are handed out like candy.
Some marriages are NOT worth saving.
You’re welcome. A little sentimental, but marriage can be like that at times.
Big Fat Liar
or best friends lovers??
I agree with the article, but how did we get in such a sad situation?
Married by the bible and divorced by the law.
It takes two to get married but it only takes one to get a divorce.
The law is destroying what God has put together.
That one problem by its self is enough, but there are so many more.
In the first place how many people get married because they actually love each other compared to just getting married to the first one who comes along?
And does it even matter?
Kids who have never been exposed to the gospel go into marriage blind, no guide, nothing, just like trying to fix a broken down car when you know absolutely nothing about it.
People will send their kids to school even if it costs every thing they have and every thing the kids can earn for years to come to prepare them to take care of them selves but they do not prepare them for the most important thing in their lives.
There are some exceptions but the kids who are brought up in Church know nothing except religion or church.
Bring on the flak.
If they hear any thing about forgiveness and responsibilities in marriage it is just in passing.
One little innocent mistake can cause a life time of hell, but those who know God and understands them selves and others can cope with it much better than those who don`t know God until years latter.
Churches were not built to preach Church or religion they were built to preach the Gospel, so why should they not preach it?
**Kids who have never been exposed to the gospel go into marriage blind, no guide, nothing, just like trying to fix a broken down car when you know absolutely nothing about it.**
I agree with you on many cases.
"bump for later."
Hey, Salvation, it's me; your FRiend.
I’ll remember that.
It's easy to believe that; however in my experience, the divorce racket is tilted towards maximum profit for the lawyers. If they can get that by setting a wealthy professional man against his stay-at-home wife by threatening to take the kids from her by any means possible, they will do that. If they can get the most for their own pockets by threatening to strip a man bare, they will do that. Try to remember that once a marriage gets into the courts, everyone becomes their slave. The one who emerges "triumphant" is often just another pawn in a larger game.
It's best for the divorcing couple to team up, for two reasons: 1) the well-being of the kids and 2) to keep the most of their assets away from lawyers, accountants and therapists. I seriously recommend divorce mediation for anyone who has reached that point of no return.
That said, couples would more rarely reach that point if they put half as much thought and energy into courtship as they will have to do at divorce. By courtship I do not mean hopping in the sack and then going through the motions of getting married because of a pregnancy, parental pressure, or emotional blackmail or love addiction by one or the other of a sexually-involved couple. I mean spending at least as much time learning about marriage as one typically spends learning to drive, taking the driver's test, saving up for your own car, researching insurance companies, researching car features, car dealers and repair options, and maintaining the car:
Hold back from sexual involvement for your own sake so your heart will not be broken or your sexual persona insulted by a bad love affair casually entered into. Wait until you are very sure your commitment is completely mutual. If you are young, hold back until married. If you are older and divorced, hold back as long as you can, take lots of time if you do decide to go at it, and indulge as little as humanly possible until you are remarried.
Prepare yourself for marriage the way you would for an important job -- education and experiences to make yourself a viable candidate.
Don't expect a real man or woman to be like a fictional character, especially a pornographic one.
Contentment is basically your own responsibility. Don't put your foot into a tarbaby.
Seek the advice of people who really love you.
Go to church or synagogue together.
Cultivate friendships and counsel from older couples who have been married a long time, and ask them over for dinner or go out with them.
Take marriage preparation classes.
Remember, maintaining a good enough marriage is like driving a car: getting around to your friends, family, job and errands of daily life is not like being a racecar driver. It is calm and has limits for your own good and the good of everyone around you.
Same goes for sex. It has to be good enough to get you there, but it can only be at top thrill for an extremely tiny number of exceptionally equipped individuals.
Don't drink and drive; don't drink and fight with your spouse.
Be courteous and share "the road."
Agreed. That is a great movie.
Excellent, excellent, excellent. See my post just above.
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