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It is beyond comprehension that a church allows a person to hold an official position in the church while openly practicing unrepentant sinful behavior.

Before giving you an answer, let me say that I personally agree with you...particularly if the person was openly flaunting his behavior beforehand.

In regards to making accusations, the Church teaches three basic principles:

calumny: the Church teaches that falsely accusing a person of a sin is wrong.

For example, if you falsely accuse a woman of having an abortion, you have sinned against that woman. The rationale behind this should be pretty obvious.
detraction: the Church teaches that if you expose a person's private sins or faults to the public without just cause, you have wronged the person.

For example, if you expose that this woman did actually have an abortion years ago, but ever since regretted it, has totally repented, and has turned her life around, you would be guilty of detraction...
rash judgment: the Church teaches that if you assume a moral fault without sufficient evidence, you have wronged the person.

For example, if a woman was pregnant and is suddenly now not pregnant and you assumed the reason was that she had an abortion, you would be guilty of rash judgment (unless, obviously, she told you as much or you have proof). She may well have miscarried the baby.

Under normal circumstances, the above is very good guidance.

But it can be abused: On one hand, it is probably a good idea not to automatically assume that two men sharing an apartment are having a homosexual relationship (rash judgment). It used to be fairly common for a woman to talk about her girlfriend(s) without automatically assuming a sexual connotation to the term. But, any more, if you hear one man talking about "his partner", it's pretty obvious what's going on (20 years ago, it might be reasonable to assume that they would be in business together -- business partners, but no more).

Nevertheless, the rationale of getting "married" or joining a "civil union" as the threshold for taking action by a diocese is that the sin (sodomy) leaves the private sphere (thus ruling out detraction) and there is no other reasonable assumption than they are committing sodomy (thus ruling out "rash judgment").

Your final statement holds true, if he did not hold a position in the church.

One who is an official of the church is held to a higher standard, and his/her private business is actually important to the church.

The story tells how the parishioners were sad about the decision - It could be simply bad reporting...and that does happen ;) - but I would expect some shock and dismay if the congregation wasn’t well aware of the ongoing relationship.

The church - the Christian body, and I mean this beyond my church or beyond the Catholic Church - the entire body of professing Christian believers has become lax and seemingly indifferent to immoral lifestyles in their congregations, be it homosexuality, sexual promiscuity, pre- or extra-marital sex, shacking up, serial marriages and divorce.

We live in decadent times - and when the Christian body practices decadence lite, it is a serious failing.

The church at Corinth had become influenced by the decadent culture around them - so the apostle Paul gave them a pass regarding their personal standards and behavior, right??? Of course he didn’t! 1 Corinthians is a very strong letter - and you can feel the ache and turmoil in Paul’s heart as he wrote such strong words to them.

But the church at Corinth was just one congregation. Today almost the entire body is infected with many of the same issues Paul addressed. And I don’t see the modern day leaders of the various groups standing boldly for the truth.

And here’s the truth - God just didn’t declare these things sinful because He wants us to live a restricted, pleasure-deprived life. He didn’t declare it so because He didn’t want us to bring shame on the family name. He did so because it is DANGEROUS! Like a parent telling the 4 year old not to play in the street - it is all about the danger and destruction and death that is visited on immoral behavior.

The social landscape of this country is strewn with the wreckage of mangled emotions, twisted psyches, ravaged bodies, broken families, brutalized children, lonely singles - all because of sinful moral conduct.

I am not pure - I have made my mistakes. But it wasn’t until the last few years that I started to see how virulently toxic sex outside the blessing and protection of a godly, God sanctioned marriage, is. My indiscretions have left a mark, and continue to affect almost every facet of my life.

The body of Christ needs to give a clear and certain warning - first within the body and then without. But the church has cowed before this satanic, sexual onslaught.

“Did God say that you will surely die?” said the serpent to Eve. “Don’t you need to ‘test drive’ your marriage before you say your vows” the old serpent asks today. “Everyone is doing it!” “You have a right to pleasure and happiness.” “It’s no big deal.” “It’s normal, natural and healthy.” As surely as God is love and wants the very, VERY best for us, satan is hate, and wants only death, disease, sorrow and destruction for us...but he whispers words of pleasure and happiness and joy as he urges us to do everything to rob us of any of it.

It is some VERY serious stuff that the church leaders, for the most part, turn a blind, or uncritical eye toward, and calamity is the result.