I still occasionally run into people (both male and female) who absolutely despise the thought of a "gaijin" living and working in Japan, much LESS being married to a Japanese. I have learned to just consider the source in most cases.
While here, I have generally worked in Japanese electronics manufacturing companies, not in English schools. As such, I have usually been the only gaijin in the company. Just like anywhere else, my Japanese co-workers have had their good days and their bad days. Some bosses were good to work for and some were real terrors. And yes, I even had one who totally despised me because I was not Japanese.
I am not trying to say that you are wrong AIT, but these people are nowhere near saints. Living and working here, one of the first things you have to accept is that you will meet ALL kinds of people. Good AND bad... And, just like anywhere else you go in the world, you try to accept the good and not sweat the bad so much. All in all, it is a great place to live.
Oh yeah, Shryke, I typically refer to myself as a gaijin. Now, do you think that this ol Mississippi country-boy is racist for using that word about myself? If you stay in Japan long enough next time, you may find out what it really means.
Take care,
Ruck
This, to me, was the kernel of the argument. You have verified what I am trying to say completely.