The church does not engage in anarchy.
Since when is it appropriate for the state to require standards for baptism, communion or other religious rites like holy matrimony?
The red herring of child protection is not guaranteed by marriage. Proving paternity is most commonly performed for out of wedlock parenting. There are sufficient laws on the books to protect children, spouses and communities without reference to marriage.
The state’s infringement on holy matrimony does enormous disrespect to the institute of marriage. Insanely high divorce rates and a hookup culture reaction to state infringement on marriage are destroying marriage.
If the state can define marriage to suit its PC priorities it should not be allowed by the church to posit requirements for church based marriage. The only viable and reasonable solution is for the church to refuse to acknowledge the necessity of state licensure for holy matrimony services.
Not everyone is a member of a church.