Free Republic
Browse · Search
News/Activism
Topics · Post Article

To: onyx; JustAmy; trisham; Lady Jag; TheOldLady; RedMDer; MeshugeMikey; The Cajun; DJ MacWoW; ...

Click the picture


There was a duck who walked into a store and said, “got any candy?”

The storekeeper said, “no, we don’t.”

The next day, the duck went into the same store and asked the same thing and got the same answer.

The duck kept going back every day for a week and asked the same thing and kept getting the same answer until the store keeper got so angry he said, “if you come in here and ask that again, I will hit you on the head with a hammer!”

The next day, the duck walks into the store and asks, “got a hammer?”

The store keeper says, “no.”

Then the duck asks, “got any candy?”




204 posted on 08/30/2015 11:13:02 PM PDT by bd476
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 203 | View Replies ]


To: FReepers; All


Four brothers left home for college, and they became successful doctors and lawyers.

One evening, they chatted after having dinner together. They discussed the 95th birthday gifts they were able to give their elderly mother who moved to Florida ...

The first said, "You know I had a big house built for Mama."

The second said, "And I had a large theater built in the house."

The third said, "And I had my Mercedes dealer deliver an SL600 to her."

The fourth said, "You know how Mama loved reading the Bible and you know she can't read anymore because she can't see very well. I met this preacher who told me about a parrot who could recite the entire Bible.

It took ten preachers almost 8 years to teach him. I had to pledge to contribute $50,000 a year for five years to the church, but it was worth it. Mama only has to name the chapter and verse, and the parrot will recite it."

The other brothers were impressed. After the celebration Mama sent out her "Thank You" notes.

She wrote: "Milton , the house you built is so huge that I live in only one room, but I have to clean the whole house. Thanks anyway."

"Marvin, I am too old to travel. I stay home; I have my groceries delivered, so I never use the Mercedes. The thought was good. Thanks."

"Michael, you gave me an expensive theater with Dolby sound and it can hold 50 people, but all of my friends are dead, I've lost my hearing, and I'm nearly blind. I'll never use it. Thank you for the gesture just the same."

"Dearest Melvin, you were the only son to have the good sense to give a little thought to your gift. The chicken was delicious. Thank you so much."

Love,
Mama


205 posted on 08/30/2015 11:41:45 PM PDT by bd476
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 204 | View Replies ]

Free Republic
Browse · Search
News/Activism
Topics · Post Article


FreeRepublic, LLC, PO BOX 9771, FRESNO, CA 93794
FreeRepublic.com is powered by software copyright 2000-2008 John Robinson