I had to spend a lot for daycare but I felt like I needed to keep working because I stayed home for a year with my first one. I applied for a job and they told me they wanted someone with recent experience. I was furious! It was a year of not working - not ten years. I think that is one reason a lot of women feel like they need to keep working. Of course, if you can stay home with your children, that is the best thing for them.
My now ex-husband and I agreed when we had children, one of us would stay home. We lived TIGHT on fiances and had four kids. I stayed home and full-time raising my kids was my career (after college/grad school pre-kids), along with taking care of other kids (gratis), volunteering in schools/charities and taking care of our home. After 21 years, divorce. When I could get interviews, the first question was always FROM THE WOMEN, “why didn’t you work”? As if taking care of our four kids, our home, other kids, volunteering in school/scouts/charities wasn’t “work”. I’m still punished in the job search for staying home raising my kids (which was not only the right thing to do for my kids, but financially daycare for four kids would have wiped out any salary I made. My career choice has no value in job hunting. Absolutely none. For my kids, it was the only choice.
A big problem is the labor surplus nowadays. It doesn’t matter what job you want, so many people are looking for work, there will be many applicants, so businesses just get picky about silly stuff just to thin the pile out. It may have nothing to do with your qualification for the job, but if you get 100 applications, what are you going to do, interview all of them?