Hospitals Giving 'Death Test' to Seniors

Newser ^ | 01/25/2016 | Neal Colgrass,

[Responsibility2nd]

"We're awfully sorry, Mom. But you flunked the test."

("Hey hon? Did you get the funeral home on the line yet?")

[Red Badger]

Mirror in front of nostrils?................

[To Hell With Poverty]

I shouldn’t lol, but I lol’ed...

[glock rocks]

If you like your death panel, you can keep your death panel.

[BigEdLB]

Exactly!

[E. Pluribus Unum]

But don’t you dare call them death panels, you ignorant racist TEA-baggers!

[gr8eman]

Sarah was right!

[To Hell With Poverty]

I have heard that geriatric care is a great proving ground for various new treatments and techniques. Aside from the obvious sinister implications of this “test,” it would be a shame to lose this area of potential innovation.

[Buckeye McFrog]

ya mean like THIS one?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NYCbF0Fat-c

[Veto!]

I have heard that geriatric care is a great proving ground for various new treatments and techniques.

Terrific. If you live long enough, you'll turn into a guinea pig.

[Red Badger]

A woman brought a very limp parrot into a veterinary hospital. As she lay her pet on the table, the vet pulled out his stethoscope and listened to the bird’s chest. After a moment or two, the Vet shook his head sadly and said, “I’m so sorry, Polly has passed
away.”

The distressed owner wailed, “Are you sure? I mean, you haven’t done any testing on him or anything. He might just be in a coma or something.”

The vet rolled his eyes, shrugged, turned and left the room returning a few moments later with beautiful black Labrador. As the bird’s owner looked on in amazement, the dog stood on his hind legs, put his front paws on the examination table and sniffed the dead parrot from top to bottom. He then looked at the vet with sad eyes and shook his head.

The vet led the dog out but returned a few moments later with a cat. The cat jumped up and also sniffed delicately at the ex-bird. The cat sat back, shook its head, meowed and ran out of the room. The vet looked at the woman and said, “I’m sorry; but like I said, your parrot is most definitely, 100% certifiably ...dead.”

He then turned to his computer terminal, hit a few keys and produced a bill which he handed to the woman. The parrot’s owner, still in shock, took the bill. “$150!” she cried. “$150 just to tell me my bird is dead?!”

The vet shrugged. “If you’d taken my word for it, the bill would only have been $20, but with the Lab Report and the Cat Scan, what did you expect?”

[ronnie raygun]

This is a test for congress!

[nuconvert]

LoL. I’ve hear that before, but I still laughed

[grania]

If I were that close to death, why would I want to stay in a hospital and catch some disease?

[Responsibility2nd]

I have heard that geriatric care is a great proving ground for various new treatments and techniques.

________________________________________________

Yeppers. But under ObamaCare it is also great opportunity to cut corners and save money.

[Wolfie]

Medical Breakthrough Provides Elderly Woman With 2 Extra Years Of Inconveniencing Family

[ProtectOurFreedom]

LOL...my daughter is training to be a Vet Tech. Just sent it to her. Thanks.

[TADSLOS]

Come'on Granny. People gotta eat.

[stephenjohnbanker]

LMAO!!

[sickoflibs]

RE :”(Newser) Seniors had better brace themselves: Some US hospitals are now administering the “death test,” which estimates their chance of dying over the next 30 days. Invented in Australia, the test weighs 29 different criteria—including blood pressure, respiratory rate, and medical history—to determine whether hospitalization is worthwhile or the patient should return home or go to a hospice, the Sydney Morning Herald reports. The idea is to prevent needless and expensive procedures while allowing patients to spend their last days with loved ones. “Most terminally ill people want to die at home, but in fact three quarters end up dying in acute hospitals, often after intrusive, expensive and ultimately pointless medical procedures,” says study author Magnolia Cardona-Morrell, the Independent reports.”

Last year an older relative of mine was diagnosed with cancer in three organs and the doctor recommended hospice care over treatment and he agreed without reservation.

He did want his last few months in misery even if drawn out a few months. He was in his late 80s and said he was ready to die.

In fact he only went to the hospital and got those tests because a symptom was making him uncomfortable even on painkillers, otherwise he was insisting on staying home

Couldn't charity help terminally ill cancer patients (who want it) instead of raising our taxes or even more debt?