/johnny
LISTER, near the navicomp hologram, has a robotic-style pool cue. He sets up so he can “shoot” through the hologram. He lowers the “cue” and drinks from a can.
RIMMER: How many of those are you going to drink?
LISTER: I told you not to talk. Game on.
RIMMER: You’re going to drink an entire six-pack of wicked-strength lager?
LISTER: I’m not gonna get plastered, Rimmer, just ... just nicely drunk.
RIMMER: Define “nicely drunk.” Is “nicely drunk” horizontal or perpendicular?
LISTER: Rimmer, I can handle it.
KRYTEN: I’m not sure I can.
LISTER: We’re in the wrong position. It’s an easier shot if we go over here. (He moves into the “better” position and lines up the shot.)
RIMMER: But that’s right in the orbital path of the planet! If you miss, we’re going to get a planet in the face.
LISTER: I’m not gonna mish.
RIMMER: “Mish?”
LISTER: What?
RIMMER: You said “mish.” “I’m not gonna mish,” you said. You’ve only had two cans and you’re steaming!
LISTER: Rimmer, will you relax? I know what I’m doing! I am not pished!
LISTER walks toward the cockpit and into the door. RIMMER covers his face
The Navicomp shows the hologrammatic view. The planets orbit their stars.
A flashback, in black and white — a pool table, midway through a game.
LISTER examines the table critically, drags on a cigarette, puts it in his ear, and lines up a shot.
Current; in colour — Starbug.
LISTER is lining up his “shot” on the Navicomp hologram. The flashback
LISTER fine-tunes his shot... The current LISTER fires his shot.
On the Navicomp, a solar flare leaps from the surface of the star, washing the blue planet out of orbit. A blue planet is enveloped in flame, and leaves its orbit. On the Navicomp, we see the hologrammatic blue planet heading straight toward the other star, missing the white hole by about half the width of the screen.
RIMMER: He’s missed.
On the Navicomp, the blue planet strikes the red planet, with a spark. The red planet is displaced.
RIMMER: We’re finished!
The hologrammatic red planet slingshots out of its orbit, toward the recently vacated-by-a-blue-planet star. Here it strikes the green. There is a flare of sparks, and the green is deflected out of its orbit
RIMMER: What the smeg is going on?
We see on the Navicomp that the green planet is heading straight toward the white hole.
LISTER: She rides!
The green planet shoots into the white hole, and it implodes to nothingness
RIMMER: You jammy goit!
LISTER: Played for, and got!
KRYTEN: Surely not, Sir!
CAT: Are you trying to say that was a trick shot?
LISTER: (Doing the touch-up shuffle) Intended! Pool God! King of the Cues! Prince of the Planet-Potters!