There’s a horrible phrase.. “Don’t get above your raisings”. Beyond the English grammatical mistakes.. it is a phrase I’ve heard poor/lower class folk say to their young. Essentially, it is a socio-economic death knoll. Don’t try to be the first one to go to college. Don’t try to be a white collar worker when everyone else in the family is blue collar. Don’t use “uppity” words. Don’t put off marriage/children until later.. after education. Essentially, it is “keep the status quo”. I remember vividly a friend of mine and we were about eight or nine. She got straight A’s on her report card. Her Uncle said to her, “I guess it is alright as long as you are pretty”. Sheesh... I swear it is one generation fearful of the next one “out doing” them. In essence, it is a phrase/lifestyle that allows full participation in the family and obviously destructive. IMHO.
In predominately black high schools in Dallas, it is common for black kids to call others who are studying, trying to succeed, ‘being like whitey’. They are considered traitors to the ‘race’. This has to come from their parents.
“WHY YOU ACTIN’ SO WHITE?!!!!!!!”
That sounds a lot like my shiftless in-laws.
On the other hand, when my grandmother said, “Don’t get above your raising,” she meant, “Even though you got an education and moved away from the farm, you still have to follow the Commandments, be honest and loyal, and respect your elders.”
If I remember correctly, another term for that mindset is the crab bucket. All the crabs are going to be sold and cooked, but if one of them attempts to get out, all the others pull it back down.