[Tolerance Sucks Rocks]

They keep coming up with one thing or another. Now that the ocean acidification controversy is being debunked, now they are saying, think of the fishies!

DOOMAGE!

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[Kenny Bunk]

Carbon dioxide concentrations predicted to occur in the ocean by the end of this century will interfere with fishes' ability to hear, smell, turn and evade predators, says Professor Philip Munday of the ARC Centre of Excellence for Coral Reef Studies and James Cook University.

This, this is a tragedy. But the good Professor has not gone far enough! Nossir!

Over the years, 12 Trillion Coke bottles and cans have been carelessly tossed into Mother Gaia's pristine waters by man. Each contains some amount of left-over Coke, a (gasp) CARBONATED beverage. The fish, drawn by the criminal sweetness of the flavor, ingest this CARBONATED material. The poor li'l buggers ain't got a Chinaman's chance!

The students of Professor Munday at the World-Renowned ARC Center have their work cut out for them. They must drain large oceanic bodies of water and clean them up. A suitable use for Stimulus Funds by my new NGO if I ever heard one.