I’m not a woman so obviously take this with a grain of salt - I think many women become surprised when they have kids at how strong the bond is and their desire to be with their children becomes overwhelming. They almost feel guilty about these feelings. Moderm feminism has caused doubt to creep in unfortunately. Women shouldn’t “want” to stay home with their kids. They should want to get back to their careers and shouldn’t feel bad about it at all. When in reality most feel very bad and guilty when they return to work.
My wife has a more “powerful” career than most women. She’s a highly educated and accomplished engineer. She now works for a consulting firm and is an expert in “Lean Manufacturing”. That being said, she’d ditch it all in a heartbeat in order to stay home with our two sons. I don’t think she thought that having our children would have such a profound effect on her. When she hears the occasional pleading of “Don’t go to work mommy! Stay home!”, it’s like a dagger in her heart.
We’ve had several women that were mothers work for us, including a couple of engineers. I cannot think of one that would not have preferred to be with their kids. They were all working for economic reasons only.
The saddest part of that statement is that by you time you factor in daycare, car expenses, other job related expenses, and taxes, even the engineers weren’t making that much. It’s just reflective of the changes that have taken place in our society - and few of them for the better!