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Parents Cherish Photos of Stillborn Babies
Newhouse News ^ | 4/20/2006 | Susan Glaser

Posted on 04/20/2006 11:13:07 AM PDT by Incorrigible

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I'm not sure what to say about this really. I think it would hard for me to request this type of photographic service if I was in that situation.
1 posted on 04/20/2006 11:13:09 AM PDT by Incorrigible
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To: Coleus

For your review


2 posted on 04/20/2006 11:13:25 AM PDT by Incorrigible (If I lead, follow me; If I pause, push me; If I retreat, kill me.)
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To: Incorrigible

I personally doubt I could handle something like that. The sad thing is that couple is from our hometown. Craziness.


3 posted on 04/20/2006 11:15:53 AM PDT by underdognewsgrl ("As many soaring voices, forever changed by Your mercy. It was beautiful." RIP Five Iron Frenzy)
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To: Incorrigible

I fully and completely understand why someone would.


4 posted on 04/20/2006 11:16:31 AM PDT by wideawake
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To: Incorrigible

Doesn't sound like the healthiest situation. It seems like it would just reawaken grief more and more. If a loved one of yours died, would you want pictures of them right after they died? Granted, you would have other types of pictures. But, this just doesn't seem healthy.


5 posted on 04/20/2006 11:17:15 AM PDT by Blogger
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To: Incorrigible
For a couple of years I worked with mothers of newborns who were unlikely to survive.

The picture is invaluable and gives the mom something to hold onto when her baby is gone. It eases the suffering to have the picture.

One friend whose baby was stillborn was not even allowed to see the baby when it was delivered and for years and years she was so saddened by that fact.

6 posted on 04/20/2006 11:21:29 AM PDT by OldFriend (I Pledge Allegiance to the Flag.....and My Heart to the Soldier Who Protects It.)
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To: wideawake

I'm glad I have the ultrasound pictures of my babies who died in utero. I haven't looked at them in several years but I'm glad I have them.

If those pregnancies had gone to term and I'd lost my babies it would be so much worse and how much more I'd treasure pictures.

In the nineteenth century death pictures were common - just read today about an old house where they found stereopticon (double, 3D) images of all the family members who had died. Photographer came into the parlor where they were laid out.

God bless this photographer in her work of charity.


7 posted on 04/20/2006 11:23:22 AM PDT by heartwood
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To: Incorrigible

This is really sad, and being a new parent myself, I completely undertand why these unfortunate mothers and fathers would want to have their stillborn infants' memories preserved through photography before they are lain to rest.


8 posted on 04/20/2006 11:23:41 AM PDT by Virginia Ridgerunner ("Si vis pacem para bellum")
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To: Incorrigible
As a father of three (one of them a sweet little 7 month-old girl) I can understand why a parent would want a photographic record of their child in this situation. Despite the fact that that baby is no longer with them, it was nonetheless a human life, nurtured in the womb and loved by both parents, and it seems a natural thing to want some way to remember their baby by.

My heart grieves for those parents who have had to go through such an ordeal.
9 posted on 04/20/2006 11:23:47 AM PDT by reagan_fanatic (Someday we'll look back on all this and plow into a parked car)
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To: wideawake

I do too. Imagine not having pictures of your child.


10 posted on 04/20/2006 11:24:35 AM PDT by TightyRighty
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To: Incorrigible

The photograph of a still born child or a older deceased infant/child was highly prized in the late 1800's and early 1900s. This is not new to our society.

If it provides comfort to the parents, who am I to judge if they should have such photos?


11 posted on 04/20/2006 11:25:42 AM PDT by texson66 ("Tyranny is yielding to the lust of the governing." - Lord Moulton)
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To: Incorrigible

I have been in the situation.

Mom didn't want to see the baby she lost.

We carefully dressed and wrapped him in a blue blanket.

The photo's were for a few months down the road when Mom changed her mind.

Most of them do.


12 posted on 04/20/2006 11:26:36 AM PDT by TASMANIANRED (The Internet is the samizdat of liberty..)
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To: Incorrigible

Being a young fella with no kids, at first glance I thought this was pretty creepy. After reading some of the posts here, I think I can understand.

I'm not sure if it would be for me, but I'm glad that it helps some people.


13 posted on 04/20/2006 11:26:44 AM PDT by samson1097
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To: Incorrigible

I don't know, maybe I'm wrong but I think this might be due to the movement away from God. They think a photo is all they have or all that ever existed of that Soul. Then again, if I had a child that died shortly after birth, I'd probably like a photo myself... not much difference. A terrible loss anyway you slice it.

jw


14 posted on 04/20/2006 11:26:56 AM PDT by JWinNC (www.anailinhisplace.net)
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To: texson66

In the early days of photography, adults were often photographed in their coffins with members of the family gathered around; it was likely the only photograph ever taken of the deceased.


15 posted on 04/20/2006 11:27:23 AM PDT by linda_22003
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To: Incorrigible

A friend has a few photos of her full-term stillborn daughter and they give her great comfort. But she keeps them privately tucked away. I can't imagine displaying them in the living room.


16 posted on 04/20/2006 11:27:42 AM PDT by T Minus Four
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To: Incorrigible

There are parents who have devoted websites to their stillborn children. My wife (ever the cynical one) showed me one impressively sappy pink fluffy page with a midi file playing a melody over the top. Yikes! Seems to me that that's a little over the top.


17 posted on 04/20/2006 11:28:45 AM PDT by ThinkPlease (Fortune Favors the Bold!)
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To: Incorrigible

This thread is hard to read without tearing up. I'm for whatever gives comfort. If pictures do it, then bless those who take them.


18 posted on 04/20/2006 11:29:44 AM PDT by najida (They who dance are thought mad by those who hear not the music.~Anonymouse)
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To: Incorrigible
When my daughter died of Sudden Infant Death Syndrome, the hospital no only provided a Polaroid camera but the materials to allow us to do and and foot prints. I prefer the pictures of my smiling little girl while my ex has those Polaroids.

I used to help out in a support group and the horror stories of callus a-holes wondering aloud what all the fuss about 'a dead baby' made me wonder why the murder rate is not a lot higher. I had a Chiropractor tell me my daughter would have lived if I had taken her into him for a 'chiropractic adjustment' -- and to this day I am amazed I did not remove his skull from his neck.

19 posted on 04/20/2006 11:29:48 AM PDT by pikachu (For every action there is an equal and opposite government program)
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Comment #20 Removed by Moderator


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