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Democrats' new strategy: Almost winning
Cicago Sun-Times ^ | August 7, 2005 | Mark Steyn

Posted on 08/07/2005 9:07:44 AM PDT by new yorker 77

The other day an official with a British teachers' union proposed that the concept of "failing" exams should be abolished. Instead of being given a "failing" grade, she said, the pupil would instead be given a "deferred success."

Oh, sure, you can scoff. But evidently the system's already being test-piloted in Howard Dean's Democratic Party. That's why the Dems' Congressional Campaign Committee hailed their electoral failure in last week's Ohio special election as a triumphant "deferred success." As their press release put it:

"In nearly the biggest political upset in recent history, Democrat Paul Hackett came within just a few thousand votes of defeating Republican Jean Schmidt in Ohio's Second Congressional District."

Yes, indeed. It was "nearly the biggest political upset in recent history," which is another way of saying it was actually the smallest political non-upset in recent history. Hackett was like a fast-forward rerun of the Kerry campaign. He was a veteran of the Iraq war, but he was anti-war, but he made solemn dignified patriotic commercials featuring respectful footage of President Bush and artfully neglecting to mention the candidate was a Democrat, but in livelier campaign venues he dismissed Bush as a "sonofabitch" and a "chicken hawk" who was "un-American" for questioning his patriotism.

And as usual this nearly winning strategy lost yet again -- this time to a weak Republican candidate with a lot of problematic baggage. Insofar as I understand it, the official Democratic narrative is that Bush is a moron who's nevertheless managed to steal two elections. Big deal. Up against this crowd, that's looking like petty larceny. After the Ohio vote, Dem pollster Stan Greenberg declared that "one of the biggest doubts about Democrats is that they don't stand for anything." That might have passed muster two years ago. Alas, the party's real problem is that increasingly there's no doubt whatsoever about it.

Fortunately, the Dems have found a new line of attack to counter the evil election-stealing moron. A few days ago, the Democratic National Committee put out a press release attacking Bush for being physically fit. It seems his physical fitness comes at the expense of the nation's lardbutt youth. Or as the DNC put it:

"While President Bush has made physical fitness a personal priority, his cuts to education funding have forced schools to roll back physical education classes and his administration's efforts to undermine Title IX sports programs have threatened thousands of women's college sports programs."

Wow. I noticed my gal had put on a few pounds but I had no idea it was Bush's fault. That sonofabitch chicken hawk. Just for the record, "his cuts to education funding" are cuts only in the sense that Hackett's performance in the Ohio election was a tremendous victory: that's to say, Bush's "cuts to education funding" are in fact an increase of roughly 50 percent in federal education funding.

Some of us wish he had cut education funding. By any rational measure, a good third of public school expenditures are completely wasted. But instead it's skyrocketed. And the idea that Bush is heartlessly pursuing an elite leisure activity denied to millions of American schoolchildren takes a bit of swallowing given that his preferred fitness activity is running. "Running" requires two things: you and ground. Short of buying every schoolkid some John Kerry thousand-dollar electric-yellow buttock-hugging lycra singlet, it's hard to see what there is about "running" that requires increasing federal funding.

Perhaps America could have a Running Czar or a National Commission on Running that would report back on the need for a Cabinet-level Runner-General. Perhaps Title IX needs to be expanded to provide a federal sneaker subsidy: a woman's right to shoes.

But I don't think so. Sitting behind yet another Vermont granolamobile bearing the bumper sticker "Bush Scares Me," I found myself thinking that perhaps the easiest way to reduce childhood obesity in American families might just to be to shout out, "Look! There's big scary Bush! Run! Run for your lives! No, wait, there's John Bolton, too! Better cut through the park before he puts his hands on his hips in an aggressive manner!" Indeed, when yesterday's coming man John Edwards dusts off his "Two Americas" stump speech -- the one with the heartwarming Dickensian vignette about the shivering girl whose parents can't afford to buy her a winter coat ($9.99 brand new from Wal-Mart) -- he might want to add a section about how an easy way for shivering coatless girls to keep warm is to run around the block a couple of times.

Speaking of shivering coatless girls in Bush's America, spare a thought for the underprivileged urchins of the Bronx. The Gloria Wise Boys & Girls Club, a nonprofit social-services organization in New York, receives millions of dollars in government funds to give disadvantaged youth in poor neighborhoods a leg up the ladder of life. But mysteriously much of the money wound up being diverted to the coffers of Air America, the liberal talk-radio network whose ratings are yet another example of "deferred success." The needs of disadvantaged Al Franken and his pals apparently outweigh those of Bronx welfare recipients. Perhaps Janeane Garofalo is the coatless girl John Edwards was talking about all those months. Air America looks like the broadcast version of the U.N. Oil-for-Food program, whereby money earmarked to save starving moppets somehow winds up in the bank accounts of bloated self-described do-gooders with political connections.

The DNC's Bush-is-the-reason-your-kid-is-fat press release is a convenient precis of the party's problem: While he runs rings around them, the Dems lounge about getting flabbier by the week and telling themselves it's all his fault they can barely move except to complain about Bush's Supreme Court nominee's kid being overly cute. What's the betting for 2006? The Dems will have a few more "nearly the biggest political upsets," while the Republicans will have the actual political upsets -- a couple more Senate seats? Including Robert C. Byrd's venerable perch in West Virginia?

Republicans may see the increasingly arthritic, corpulent, wheezing, flatulent Democratic Party as a boon for them, but I don't. Two-party systems need two parties, not just for the health of the loser but for that of the winner, too. Intellectually, philosophically, legislatively, it's hard to maintain the discipline to keep yourself in shape when the other guy just lies around the house all day.


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This is why they need Fake Polls from the MSM.

Fake Polls: The Fool's Gold of the Left.

1 posted on 08/07/2005 9:07:44 AM PDT by new yorker 77
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To: new yorker 77

How about some DNC We're #2 foam fingers?


2 posted on 08/07/2005 9:11:02 AM PDT by new yorker 77
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To: new yorker 77

HAHHAHAHAHAHA...yeppers...wishful thinking when you ignore the facts for your own agenda...also "rigged" polls help.


3 posted on 08/07/2005 9:11:21 AM PDT by in hoc signo vinces ("Soylent Green is People!")
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To: in hoc signo vinces

2002 and 2004.

Reality.

2006.

More Reality.

Enjoy Liberals.


4 posted on 08/07/2005 9:13:10 AM PDT by new yorker 77
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To: new yorker 77

> "deferred success."

If the DEMs (Domestic Enemy Mob) continue to "underwin",
they'll soon be demanding a "No Politician Left Behind"
program.


5 posted on 08/07/2005 9:13:48 AM PDT by Boundless
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To: new yorker 77

Yes, while they chant "We're number 2, we're number 2"! In unison.


6 posted on 08/07/2005 9:14:15 AM PDT by conservativebabe (Down with Islam)
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To: new yorker 77

welcome, and check in the Search: category before posting to see if it has been posted before.

It is so good, that maybe it could be left up again so the 'back from Church' crowd sees it...


here's another thread on the same excellent article with some good comments...


http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/1458593/posts


7 posted on 08/07/2005 9:15:10 AM PDT by bitt ('We will all soon reap what the ignorant are now sowing.' Victor Davis Hanson)
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To: conservativebabe
"We're number 2, we're number 2"!

And we all know what #2 is. :)

8 posted on 08/07/2005 9:15:57 AM PDT by Darkwolf377 ("The dumber people think you are, the more surprised they'll be when you kill them."-Wm. Clayton)
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To: Boundless
Ask Senator Tom Daschle if the Democrat success in a state special election for a House seat is a predicate for the coming election.

Oh wait.

He's FORMER Senator Tom Daschle.

Liberals never learn.
9 posted on 08/07/2005 9:17:01 AM PDT by new yorker 77
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To: bitt

I am the back from Church crowd.

Sorry about that.

It's the column so good they posted it twice.


10 posted on 08/07/2005 9:18:22 AM PDT by new yorker 77
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To: new yorker 77
Good bye to you
11 posted on 08/07/2005 9:18:30 AM PDT by Mo1
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To: new yorker 77
Yum, that was a GOOD one! Steyn is always readable but sometimes he just gets it SO right.

This crap about Bush somehow being responsible for kids being out of shape is the ULTIMATE expression of DemmyDummy victimhood. Get off your fat asses and stop whining for the government to take MY money and give it to YOU so someone will yell at you to do one more lap! Turn off that damned TV and exercise!

12 posted on 08/07/2005 9:20:36 AM PDT by Darkwolf377 ("The dumber people think you are, the more surprised they'll be when you kill them."-Wm. Clayton)
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To: Mo1

I enjoyed that, thanks.


13 posted on 08/07/2005 9:25:27 AM PDT by conservativebabe (Down with Islam)
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To: Darkwolf377

"This crap about Bush somehow being responsible for kids being out of shape is the ULTIMATE expression of DemmyDummy victimhood"

No kidding,they can't be serious. Bush is the most fit President ever, working out 6 times a week.

Guess Bill "Big Mac" Clinton gets a pass on this one, as usual.


14 posted on 08/07/2005 9:27:10 AM PDT by conservativebabe (Down with Islam)
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To: Mo1
That was great!


15 posted on 08/07/2005 9:27:45 AM PDT by andyandval (Try flushing a book down the toilet....get back to me on how you did)
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To: new yorker 77

They are working hard on their self-esteem. They now realize, as the official First Runner-up, that "in the event that the Winner cannot fulfill his/her duty as Winner..." That is giving them some solace.


16 posted on 08/07/2005 9:28:28 AM PDT by small voice in the wilderness (Quick, act casual. If they sense scorn and ridicule, they'll flee..)
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To: conservativebabe

You're most welcome :0)


17 posted on 08/07/2005 9:31:34 AM PDT by Mo1
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Comment #18 Removed by Moderator

To: Mo1

That is just hysterical!
Also a wonderful tribute to President Reagan on the same site, check it out!!


19 posted on 08/07/2005 9:45:02 AM PDT by Fudd Fan (fiat voluntas Tua)
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To: new yorker 77
How about some DNC We're #2 foam fingers?

You know, you may have something there.

Somebody oughta start a store where DUmmies could proudly purchase paraphernalia that symbolizes their party.

- flip-flops
-we're #2 fingers
-half-burnt American flags
-white surrender flags
-maps showing the path to Canada in case the draft is re-instituted
-aborted babies pictures
-partial-birth abortion pictures
-old hammer & sickle USSR flags
-pictures of whale Kennedy in a bathing suit at the beach
-pictures of Jane Fonda in Hanoi
-pictures of John Kerry in a Ho-Chi Min city heroes' museum


and many more, I'm sure
20 posted on 08/07/2005 10:14:01 AM PDT by adorno (The democrats are the best recruiting tool the terrorists could ever have.)
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