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Get Pregnant, Or Get Sent To Iraq
St. Petersburg Times ^ | September 19, 2004 | Leonora LaPeter

Posted on 09/22/2004 2:04:26 AM PDT by Former Military Chick

GULFPORT -- Cristie Oliver sat down heavily at the kitchen table as she read the Western Union mailgram.

"Oh, no," she said, the color draining from her face.

Her mother, Cheryl Sendio, figured Cristie must have just opened a whopper of a bill.

"They're going to make me leave my baby," Cristie whimpered.

The mailgram was from the Army; Cristie was being called back to active duty. The Army wanted as many as 545 days, starting Sept. 5.

It had been more than two years since Cristie had put on a military uniform at Fort Riley, Kan. It was not a place where she had fit in. Twice she had had to repeat basic training, and she had left early after giving birth to her daughter, Asia.

That night, their pastor, the Rev. Dr. Angel R. Toro, sat next to a despondent Cristie on the couch in her mother's living room. He told her he would start the church prayer line, a group of 15 people who would pray for her each night.

"Sometimes," the reverend said, "God has a way of surprising us."

The next day, members of the Chapel on the Hill United Church of Christ of Seminole gathered outside a courtroom to support two of their own, a pair of gay dads trying to adopt foster children. Among the group were Cristie and her mother.

Toro silenced the group, announced that Cristie had been called to Iraq and asked the members to pray for her. They held hands and bowed their heads. They converged on Cristie, hugging and kissing her. One woman told Cristie that she had a son in the Navy, and she offered advice:

"You should get pregnant."

On July 6, the Army began sending out 5,674 Western Union mailgrams to former soldiers in the Individual Ready Reserve. These are inactive reservists who completed their active duty time but are available to fill vacancies in emergencies. Some people call this the back-door draft.

Rarely are these soldiers called back; most assume that when they're done with active duty, they're done. That's why the mailgram that arrived July 15 threw Cristie for such a loop.

She had enlisted during her senior year at Pinellas Park High School. A recruiter approached her several times. She didn't really want to go, but she didn't know what else to do.

Her mother thought it was a good idea. Cristie was shy and quiet, with an innocence that Sendio thought needed to be tempered with confidence. A dose of the Army might do her good.

Cristie smoked and didn't exercise much before she reported for boot camp at Fort Leonard Wood in Missouri. Push-ups, sit-ups, running - she always lagged behind.

"I'm a really sensitive person, and they're all yelling at me, and I'd just go back and cry," she remembered. "I was trying to fail so they'd send me home."

That didn't happen. She completed boot camp and trained to be a chemical operations specialist.

Michael Oliver, who also was in chemical operations, remembers the day he and his buddies were replacing the wheel on a small tank. Cristie and three other fresh-faced female recruits walked up.

Michael took one look at Cristie and called dibs on her - something about her model-like walk. She gave up her boyfriend back in St. Petersburg. Michael sent her a different-colored rose 12 days in a row, and he sent love notes:

Lifetime is all I have for you

Oliver, that's my last name

LOL.

Vase that sits on a table that have priceless memories

Everyday that I see those pretty brown dreamin eyes

Cristie got pregnant in September 2001, and they married a few months later. She and a half-dozen other pregnant recruits were assigned administrative tasks at post headquarters.

She wanted to name the baby Africa. Michael didn't. They compromised on Asia.

Cristie left the Army the day after Asia was born, a few months shy of her two-year obligation. Michael got out a month later. They did not look back.

After leaving the Army, they struggled financially.

In the past year, they finally found good jobs. Cristie, 22 now, does office work at the attorney general's office in St. Petersburg, and on weekends she works at a movie theater. Michael works in customer service at PODS, the portable on demand storage company in Clearwater.

Their 1995 Ford Contour broke down and needed $800 in repairs. Michael took the bus to work; Cristie's mom drove her. Cristie's stepfather picked up Asia from day care.

They talked about having another child, but Cristie wanted their finances in order first. Michael kept pressing, and she finally relented. But they were always so tired at night. Sex came last.

Then the mailgram came and everything changed: Get pregnant, get out of going to Iraq.

A friend of the family gave her an ovulation cycle wheel. She put in the date of her last period and saw a tiny window of time the last week of July.

She and Michael would have just one shot.

Cristie awoke at 3 a.m. Michael lay asleep beside her, the TV still on.

She padded into the bathroom, opened her home pregnancy test, urinated on the strip. And waited.

Minutes ticked by. She thought about Asia without her. And Iraq. And the beheadings on TV. What if she went there and never came back? What would become of Asia? Cristie was just so scared.

The little line signifying that she was pregnant did not appear on the strip. She sat on the toilet and cried.

A week later, Cristie felt cramping in her stomach.

Her report date was three weeks away, and she and Michael had made no preparations. She hadn't even looked at her military gear, stowed in a box in the back of her closet.

Cristie decided she would try another pregnancy test, after Michael got home.

That night, 2-year-old Asia lined up birthday candles on the coffee table. "Dats bootiful," she said.

Cristie ran around the kitchen barefoot, in a long, blue, flowery dress like something out of a painting by Monet. She fixed Asia a waffle. Rodgers & Hammerstein's Cinderella played on TV.

The doorbell rang. In came Cristie's neighbor, 21-year-old Shanetra Wells, holding her 3-year-old's hand and heaving a car seat with her 2-month-old in it. Shanetra's 15-year-old brother, Norman "Trey" Wells III, strolled in behind, chewing on a Coke-can-sized pork rind.

"Did they tell you about my orders to go back in the military?" Cristie asked.

"You going back?" Shanetra said.

"I don't know yet."

Wells picked up her baby and handed him to Cristie, who gently smoothed his soft, curly hair.

"I like this," Cristie said.

"If you have to go back to the Army, it's the wrong time to go," Shanetra said.

"Five hundred forty-five days. It's almost two years."

"Oooooh, you're their property now."

"Would you like to stick around and see if I'm pregnant?"

"Sure, why not?"

Cristie emerged from the bathroom with a white stick in hand. She left it on the kitchen counter and paced back and forth, hands flat on her face.

"I'm not looking at it," she said, back to the counter. "I'm afraid."

She looked. If pregnant, the stick shows two lines. Only one showed.

Cristie drummed fingers on the counter, walked away, shook her hands, her amber eyes wide, panicked. And back again.

"There's a second line. It's really faint," she said. "I can see it, but it's not all the way there. I don't know. Look at it. I can see it, but it's not coming.

"Michael, come here. Do you see the second line?"

Michael studied the stick. There was a dark maroon line and sort of a shadow next to it.

"A little bit," he said. "Last time we saw no color."

"I think I'm excited now," Cristie said.

Again Cristie picked up the stick. The second line was a shade darker, but nowhere near as dark as the first.

"Oooh, it's darker. I'm pregnant. I'm pregnant."

Michael dialed his mother in Arkansas. "She's got to be the first one," he said.

"How you doing, Mom? You're going to be a grandma again."

Cristie called her mother.

Said Sendio: "I'll be convinced I'm a grandmother (again) when you go see a doctor."

On Cristie's lunch break the next day, she sat in an empty waiting room at Planned Parenthood under a sign that read: Behold how good and pleasant it is for brothers to dwell together in unity.

She hoped they wouldn't charge her for the visit; she had no money in her wallet. She wore boots, jeans with diagonal strips of brown corduroy, a tan halter top and a beige sweater. She had told co-workers that she was pregnant.

"Some people think it's a good idea. Some people think it's a horrible idea, that it's for not the right reasons."

She talked about recent news reports that the United States was bringing home tens of thousands of soldiers from Europe and Asia.

"What about the people in Iraq? What about the people dying over there? It doesn't make any sense to me."

She pulled her sweater tighter. "I hate waiting," she said, and frowned.

The clinic assistant tested her urine three times, with three brands of pregnancy tests. All were inconclusive. She told Cristie she would have to test her blood and left the room.

Cristie looked worried and confused.

The assistant came back. "I checked the test again," she said, her face dissolving into a smile, "and you're pregnant. Congratulations."

"I knew it, I knew it. That's awesome."

"Congratulations," the assistant said. "It looks like you're not going to Iraq."

Cristie called the Army the next day to report her news. They sent her a delay and exemption packet that she returned with proof she was pregnant.

She and Michael are relieved beyond words - for now. Cristie learned her pregnancy only delays her entry into the military until four months after the baby is born.

After that, she could be called up again.

Researcher Caryn Baird contributed to this report.


TOPICS: News/Current Events
KEYWORDS: military; militarywomen; pregnant; women
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To: R. Scott

"I guess I just believe in equality."

WHAT ARE YOU? A LIBERAL?

;o)


101 posted on 09/22/2004 6:52:26 AM PDT by BritishBulldog (New Labour - Putting the "National" back into "Socialist")
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To: Former Military Chick

We pray that Asia never has to live in a world where madmen take away her life because she is a free American.


102 posted on 09/22/2004 6:56:13 AM PDT by Cultural Jihad
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To: R. Scott
Why would they be recalling a chemical operations specialist?

Iraq did have chemical weapons, and a few have been used against US forces – fortunately the insurgents didn’t know how to use them properly.

I have been hearing a little about the recalls. They have been recalling personell for specific slots in which there was a shortage in iraq according to their mos. They are calling people back because they need those people to do the job they were trained for.

That leaves three possibilities.

A) the story is inaccurate about the young ladies mos.

B) The story is a made up lie.

C) There is a need for chemical specialists in Iraq.

Whereas I wouldn't put it past a reporter to screw up or lie to me, I just don't smell that here. Leaving a third and rather interesting option on the table.

103 posted on 09/22/2004 7:05:00 AM PDT by bad company (What's the font kenneth?)
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To: flada
Has she forfeited a right to a family?

Is there such a right?

104 posted on 09/22/2004 7:10:18 AM PDT by Chemist_Geek ("Drill, R&D, and conserve" should be our watchwords! Energy independence for America!)
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Comment #105 Removed by Moderator

To: Chemist_Geek

If there's a right to free speech, freedom of worship, not have troops quartered in your home, not incriminate yourself, etc; then there's most definitely a right to a family. And as I'm certain that you could point out that some people are sterile and therefore can't enjoy such a right, I could just as easily point out that some people ar mute and therefore can't enjoy speech.


106 posted on 09/22/2004 7:18:10 AM PDT by flada (No Bounce No Play (from Dreamcatcher)... got that Senator Kerry?)
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To: BritishBulldog
As a Brit, I wasn't aware that military recruiters target high school children in the US & I have to say that I'm a little surprised.

I don't know for certain, but I'm willing to bet that the majority of enlistments in the Services are recent high school graduates, about 18 years of age.

I know the British educational system is different - I don't think there is such a thing as high school - but I guess the equivalent is the GCSE.

What's the British Army, or the Royal Navy or RAF's recruiting policies?

107 posted on 09/22/2004 7:29:48 AM PDT by Chemist_Geek ("Drill, R&D, and conserve" should be our watchwords! Energy independence for America!)
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To: flada
I don't think such a policy would stand up in the courts unless men are contractually sterilized as well, but I could be wrong.

Scary to think that our courts could be so idiotic, but it is indeed possible. Lofty ideological notions about "equality" can't override real world biology. Men don't get pregnant, period. And I hate the touchy-feely nonsense of couples who tell people that "we're pregnant". Men can be "pregnant" by 100 different women at the same time, and it still wouldn't affect their ability to perform military duties.

108 posted on 09/22/2004 7:50:00 AM PDT by GovernmentShrinker (Donate to the Swift Vets -- www.swiftvets.com)
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To: flada
And what of a woman who elects to be career military? Has she forfeited a right to a family?

Why do you use the word forfeit? The choice is that persons decision. She could have become pregnant at 15 and "given up" the "right" to a college education. She/he, at the ripe age of 17, could have made any of a myriad of decisions which could have had dire consequences on "rights" and abilities later on in her/his life. I'm sorry, but we need to teach that choices have consequences. One may choose to serve their country. So serve it.

109 posted on 09/22/2004 7:51:47 AM PDT by AndrewC (I also think that Carthage should be destroyed. - Cato)
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To: Former Military Chick

This is the outcome of the "equal right" of females to serve in the military. One day, sitting in the residue of a failed democracy called the United States, some liberal historian will ask "what were we thinking?"


110 posted on 09/22/2004 7:56:54 AM PDT by yetidog
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To: Junior; Prime Choice
To Prime Choice:

Dude, read a bit more carefully. She was already out. She didn't want to be called back up. Big difference.

She was not "out".

You are not "out" until you are discharged from the service.

She had only been released from active duty but still owed obligated Reserve service time. The sole purpose of the Reserves is to have a pool of trained individuals available for recall to active duty when the need arises.

It is all there in the contract that you sign when you volunteer for the U.S. Armed Forces. She should read her enlistment contract a bit more carefully.

111 posted on 09/22/2004 8:08:50 AM PDT by Polybius
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To: BritishBulldog

Hope not! I thought liberals believed in superiority for designated races/genders/ethnic groups/occupations/etc.


112 posted on 09/22/2004 9:15:29 AM PDT by R. Scott (Humanity i love you because when you're hard up you pawn your Intelligence to buy a drink.)
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To: bad company

I would choose B if the story was from CBS. Lacking that I would go with C.


113 posted on 09/22/2004 9:18:22 AM PDT by R. Scott (Humanity i love you because when you're hard up you pawn your Intelligence to buy a drink.)
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To: Junior
Dude, read a bit more carefully. She was already out.

You are not 'out' until you've been discharged. That's a fact.

114 posted on 09/22/2004 10:56:44 AM PDT by Prime Choice (The Religion of Peace ISN'T.)
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To: BritishBulldog

Here in the States you can enlist at 17 years of age. I seriously considered that


115 posted on 09/22/2004 1:20:47 PM PDT by Central_Floridian (Let's roll!)
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Comment #116 Removed by Moderator

To: Former Military Chick
Cristie smoked and didn't exercise much before she reported for boot camp at Fort Leonard Wood in Missouri. Push-ups, sit-ups, running - she always lagged behind.

"I'm a really sensitive person, and they're all yelling at me, and I'd just go back and cry," she remembered. "I was trying to fail so they'd send me home."

Nice job, Private Benjamin. Maybe the Army wasn't for you, after all.


117 posted on 09/22/2004 2:06:44 PM PDT by Hat-Trick (Do you trust a government that cannot trust you with guns?)
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To: Former Military Chick

Ive seen Army females get knocked up to get out of a 30 day field exercise.


118 posted on 09/22/2004 2:32:57 PM PDT by IDontLikeToPayTaxes
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To: flada
My wife is active duty Navy and is currently on sea duty assigned to a ship (I'm a former sailor and current Reservist in a billet unlikely to ever be mobilized). We're a married couple, financially we are doing pretty well, and we would like to have children. Should we wait just because she's in the military? How is that fair? Men in the military don't have to wait to start a family.

On the other hand, if your wife got pregnant while on a cruise she'd be in deep doo doo. The reason for that is because every soldier, sailor, airman, or marine pulled from a unit costs the unit in terms of combat power and cohesiveness. You don't do that to a unit that's deploying to combat for something that is preventable.

119 posted on 09/22/2004 2:50:00 PM PDT by No Longer Free State
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To: BritishBulldog
Is it right that the two year old should be denied her mother for two years so she should be callled back in the army?

But it's OK for her to be denied her father? Chauvanist.

120 posted on 09/22/2004 2:53:25 PM PDT by No Longer Free State
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