[IronJack]

I’ll urge Republican candidates to avoid attacks on homosexuals when homosexuals avoid attacks on Christian cake bakers, hotels, florists, schools, employers, and institutions. Until then, I see our “attacks” as less an offense than a defense.

[WIBamian]

This Republican submission is now actually called the 'Scott Walker Bend-Over and Accept Gayness Strategy' on the nation's stage.

[Kenny Bunk]

MEMO:
How to Handle LGBTG Issues:
A Primer for Republican Candidates

Candidates,
I am sure you have noticed how touchy these damn queer SOBs can be when candidates negatively view their unnatural and lethal life styles and sex practices. With a little care, you can avoid the minefield, OK?

Avoid these expressions:
Filthy Buggers
Perverts
God-Cursèd Sodomites
Poof-Da
Faggot, or Fag
Dyke
Butch
Sapphic
Homo
etc.

Do not ROTFLYAO when questions about these Biblically condemned perverts inquire about "Gay Marriage." Pretend to thoughtfully mull over the question before changing the subject.

Watch your step. There is nothing gay about Gays. OTOH, damn few of the carpet-munchers and fudge-packers are going to be voting for you anyway, no matter how sensitive you are, so don't obsess about it.

You may want to point out that they would possibly be more at home in some other party. Refer them to this website for more info on that:

http://www.reggienbarrypolitics4gays.com