1. People will remember how you leave...
For most people, that won't happen for long. It's not about you anyway: it's about the worship of the true and living God. When I have left churches (not for reasons of geographic relocation), it's been for reasons associated with worship and ministry opportunity (see point 4 below).
2. Those who remain may be wounded if you leave poorly...
If there are such people, then you've already had the conversations about the 'why'. The implication of this point is that there's a disagreement over you leaving and someone else staying. If a 'friend' can't understand that, then it's time to move on. Heck, the reason you're leaving could be that you yourself were 'wounded' by an event or a teaching point or some incident that is now hampering your ability to worship.
3. Your family can be scarred by a bad ending...
Few changes in life happen without some regrets. Doesn't mean that the change is the wrong move. If you can't explain in point-by-point fashion why you're leaving (to friends, family, etc.), then you need to assess whether the change is appropriate. Once you can do so and can comfortably defend your reasoning (scripturally if necessary), then you're ready for any negative blowback.
4. Poor closures usually color future ministry opportunities...
Only if you continue to brood about the past. If you are determined to depart, the reasons to do so clearly have outweighed the reasons to stick around... and that's got nothing to do with ministry opportunities. Heck, you are probably leaving because your current ministry opportunities are being hampered in some manner. Leaving could easily be the best thing to help!
5. Division left by bad departures can destroy a congregation’s unity...
2 points here: (1) It is inappropriate to leave a congregation while effectively carrying a banner saying "We're leaving: who's with me?". Again: it's not about you. If you make it about you, then you need to repent.
(2) There are congregations that have a political divide (like those rallying around a pastor while others support an elder/trustee board). Avoid these where possible. People who lose sight of that prior point will eventually bring trouble. Don't be part of such factions.
Note: this is different from the situation in which someone - even a church officer - is in unrepentant sin. The ruling board of the church needs to deal with this and remove such a person. If they don't, that's a solid reason for you to leave.
6. Good departures make ministry a celebration. Rejoicing over victories is always better than battling over remaining disagreements.
There are some disagreements that are based in fundamental issues with Biblical teaching. These are important. Arguments over the color of the walls or carpet are not. Learn the difference.
7. Healthy closure paves the way for the next leaders...
Some people can be worked with because they understand such things. Some cannot. We can't change that.
8. Leaving well fosters long-term friendships. Moving to a different church doesn’t have to harm relationships if the departure is handled well.
If your reasons for leaving are good, then you need to move on. People are fallen and won't always react in the manner you hope.
9. Good leavings promote Christian unity...
See answer to Point 8. Time doesn't necessarily heal all wounds. It's also quite possible to have everyone united... and to be wrong. Don't stay on a sinking ship in the name of 'unity'.
10. People will remember how you leave...
Look at the turnover in your church's membership: in 5 years, how many will ever know that you were there? Serve well and that number will increase, for sure, but I'll say this once again -- with a different flavor -- the servant is not greater than the master: serve God well and don't worry about how people react.
People will respect the good servants of God. More importantly, you want that declaration at the end: "Well done, my good and faithful servant".
I agree with your response. Some believe in peace and uplifting at all costs. I have left some for doctrinal matters and explained why to any who desired to know why. I have asked some to leave with the same conditions. Defend earnestly is not an idol comment. Lk 10:10-18 is more than a request for fidelity to God’s word. There is conflict on every page of Scripture. There are more warnings concerning wrongdoing than blessings for doing good.
This.
People can be remarkably petty. They get their fragile little egos hung up on things being done exactly their way.
This is not restricted to the congregation as pastors who, you think would know better, can get stick in the key of mememememememememe as well.
Something to keep in mind is that it is His Church. If He is not being glorified there is a problem. If He is then the problem might be you.