Posted on 12/20/2018 5:08:18 PM PST by marshmallow
DETROIT, December 18, 2018 (LifeSiteNews) – Amid torrents of criticism, the Archdiocese of Detroit hastily moved to censure a priest who delivered a funeral homily steeped in Church teaching after the parents of the young man who committed suicide loudly complained to the media and church officials.
Complaints by Jeff and Linda Hullibarger, parents of 18-year-old Maison, who committed suicide, drew the attention of national secular media to Our Lady of Mount Carmel Catholic Church in Temperance, Michigan, where Fr. Don LaCuesta presided over their son’s funeral Mass.
The Hullibargers had met with Fr. LaCuesta in advance of the funeral and told him “what they expected in the homily,” according to an initial report by the Detroit Free Press.
“We wanted him to celebrate how Maison lived, not how he died," said the boy’s mother.
“Maison didn’t deserve this," Linda Hullibarger told The New York Times. "He basically called him a sinner in front of everybody. We were just blindsided.”
The parents were so incensed that they asked the priest to stay behind rather than accompany them to the cemetery when the Mass was over.
After his homily garnered national attention, the Archdiocese abruptly suspended Fr. LaCuesta from presiding over funerals while also demanding that all other homilies be “reviewed by a priest mentor,” according to a press release from the Archdiocese of Detroit.
The priest will also be “getting help from professionals – on human, spiritual and pastoral levels – to probe how and why he failed to effectively address the grief of the family in crisis,” continues the statement.
However, a review of Fr. LaCuesta’s text for his homily makes much of the criticism seem unwarranted, if not hyperbolic.
“Father LaCuesta was thrown under the bus, a fate that is typical for any priest who..........
(Excerpt) Read more at lifesitenews.com ...
Surprised?
No........
Ping
The priest went against the expressed wishes of the parents.
They are already going through enough as it is.
If they wished to seek private counsel after the ceremony, that would have been their option.
If the priest felt this strongly against cooperating with the wishes of the family, he owed it to them to say so long before this event. The Coach who is suspected of bullying this young man came to the service too, in spite of specifically being asked to stay far away.
These two have been through the wringer.
I cannot imagine what it was like for them during that memorial.
No priest is obliged to respect personal "wishes".
Proof of that is he died.
The priest’s homily:
My heart goes out to you, Mr. & Mrs. [REDACTED], and to you [REDACTED]’s siblings: [REDACTED], to Grandma [REDACTED], to [REDCATED]’s many aunts & uncles & cousins. It is with great difficulty that I stand before you knowing the pain and anguish you are going through. But I am aware, as well, that I am only a humble, unworthy mouthpiece. I ask God to use my words to bring the light, comfort and healing you need.
Is there any hope to offer in this moment? Must we only speak of our profound grief, our indescribable sorrow, even our anger and confusion at how such a thing could have happened? Is there any word from God that might break into our darkness like a ray of light?
Yes, yes, a thousand times. If we Christians are right in believing that salvation belongs to Jesus Christ, that it does not come from us—and that our hand cannot stop what God allows for us, then yes, there is hope in eternity even for those who take their own lives.
Having said that, I think that we must not call what is bad good, what is wrong right. Because we are Christians, we must say what we know is the truth – that taking your own life is against God who made us and against everyone who loves us. Our lives are not our own. They are not ours to do with as we please. God gave us life, and we are to be good stewards of that gift for as long as God permits.
The finality of suicide makes this all the worse. You cannot make things right again. Neither can [REDACTED]. And this is much of the pain of it all. Things are left unresolved, even if it felt to [REDACTED] like this was the only way to resolve things. You want to turn the clock back and say, “Please don’t give up. We can work
through this pain together. “ But now you will have to work through this pain by yourselves, or with those close to you now who will need to lean on you even as you lean on them.
On most people’s mind, however, especially of us who call ourselves Christians, on our minds as we sit in this place is: Can God forgive and heal this? Yes, God CAN forgive even the taking of one’s own life. In fact, God awaits us with his mercy, with ever open arms. Sacred Scripture says clearly: God proves his love for us in that while we still were sinners Christ died for us (Romans 5:8). God’s abiding mercy is what sets us to ask for it. Although God doesn’t dangle his mercy like a carrot, waiting for us to ask for it in order to receive it, we do have to believe in our hearts, express with our words, and show in our actions – that it is always there. God wants nothing but our salvation but he will never force himself on us, he will not save us without us. That’s how much he loves us. Because ofthe allembracing sacrifice of Christ on the cross God can have mercy on any sin. Yes, because of his mercy, God can forgive suicide and heal what has been broken.
Because God is merciful he makes allowance for the spiritual, mental, and emotional despair that leads to suicide. God is able to read the heart, to know the whole truth of a person’s life, and thereby to pass sentence with mercy. God knows something we must discipline ourselves to do in these moments – he knows not to judge a person’s entire life on the basis of the worst and last choice the person made. God can look at the totality of a human being’s life and celebrate all the good that came from it, even while taking seriously the tragic choice that ended everything. And then he shows his mercy and love in ways beyond our limited understanding.
Nothing can separate us from the love of God, the great St. Paul assures us (in that Reading we just listened to). Nothing – including suicide.
Who will bring any charge against God’s chosen ones? St. Paul asks. It is God who acquits us. Who will condemn? Christ Jesus sits at the right hand of God even now, interceding for this one who could not stand before God on his/her own. Truly, none of us can stand before God on our own. We all need Christ to intercede for us, to plead our case. And here’s the good news: Christ has never lost a case!
What will separate us from the love of Christ? St. Paul answers that question with a display of words that cover everything he can think of in so little space. Not death or life, not angels or principalities, not present things or future things, not powers or height or depth or any other creature will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.
What did St. Paul leave out of that list? Nothing. He did not list suicide, but he did not list murder or gossip or greed either. He covered all of those things in the final flurry of words that includes anything else in all creation. No deed is too evil to be beyond the forgiveness of Christ. No tragedy is too great to separate us from the love of God.
If that is so, if the Scriptures can be believed, if God can be trusted even in this, then it gives us hope and guidance for how to manage our sorrow and anger and loss. We give it all to God. We hope...we can only hope. We do not carry it ourselves. We try to give thanks for the blessings of life we knew and shared with [REDACTED], with this child of God. And we remind ourselves that he is not lost to God who seeks to save all of his children.
And so, we take great comfort and consolation in all this. Nothing-not even suicide-can separate us from the unconditional love of God. It is to this all- merciful love that we, through our prayers, entrust and continue to entrust the soul of [REDACTED]. Let us not deny him now of the help he needs most-our love expressed through our trusting prayers.
My dear friends, today, and in the difficult days to come, when darkness threatens to envelop and darken our hearts, let us raise high the bright light of our Redeemer and proclaim his saving mercy: Praised be Jesus Christ, now and for ever!
Always figured you went to a priest for spiritual guidance, not to dictate terms and conditions. Maybe these parents would have been better served to hire a motivational speaker.
Read the homily posted below. Where did he call him a sinner?
Are you quoting the media article?
From a post on another thread by Mrs. Don-o. Judge for yourself.
My heart goes out to you, Mr . & Mrs . [REDACTED], and to you [REDACTED] ‘ s siblings: [REDACTED ] , to Grandma [REDACTED] , to [REDCATED] ‘ s many aunts & uncles & cousins.
It is with great difficulty that I stand before you knowing the pain and anguish you are going through. But I am aware, as well, that I am only a humble, unworthy mouthpiece. I ask God to use my words to bring the light, comfort and healing you need.
Is there any hope to offer in this moment? Must we only speak of our profound grief , our indescribable sorrow , even our anger and confusion at how such a thing could have happened? Is there any word from God that might break into our darkness like a ray of light?
Yes, yes, a thousand times yes.
If we Christians are right in believing that salvation belongs to Jesus Christ, that it does not come from us — and that our hand cannot stop what God allows for us, then yes , there is hope in eternity even for those who take their own lives.
Having said that, I think that we must not call what is bad good, what is wrong right. Because we are Christians, we mus t say what we know is the truth – that taking your own life is against God who made us and against everyone who loves us .
Our lives are not our own. They are not ours to do with as we please. God gave us life, and we are to be good stewards of that gift for as long as God permits.
The finality of suicide makes this all the worse. You cannot make things right again. Neither can [REDACTED] .
And this is much of the pain of it all. Things are left unresolved, even if it felt to [REDACTED] like this was the only way to resolve things. You want to turn the clock back and say, “ Please don’t give up. We can work through this pain together . “
But now you will have to work through this pain by yourselves, or with those close to you now who will need to lean on you even as you lean on them.
On most people’s mind, however, especially of us who call ourselves Christians, on our minds as we sit in this place is: Can God forgive and heal this?
Yes, God CAN forgive even the taking of one’s own life. In fact, God awaits us with his mercy, with ever open arms. Sacred Scripture says clearly: God proves his love for us in that while we still were sinners Christ died for us (Romans 5:8). God’s abiding mercy is what sets us to ask for it.
Although God doesn’t dangle his mercy like a carrot , waiting for us to ask for it in order to receive it, we do have to believe in our hearts, express with our words, and show in our actions – that it is always there.
God wants nothing but our salvation but he will never force himself on us, he will not save us without us. That’s how much he loves us. Because of the all - embracing sacrifice of Christ on the cross God can have mercy on any sin.
Yes , because of his mercy, God can forgive suicide and heal what has been broken. Because God is merciful he makes allowance for the spiritual, mental, and emotional despair that leads to suicide. Go d is able to read the heart, to know the whole truth of a person’s life, and thereby to pass sentence with mercy.
God knows something we must discipline ourselves to do in these moments – he knows not to judge a person’s entire life on the basis of the worst and last choice the person made. God can look at the totality of a human being’s life and celebrate all the good that came from it, even while taking seriously the tragic choice that ended everything.
And then he shows his mercy and love in ways beyond our limited understanding. Nothing can separate us from the love of God, the great St. Paul assures us (in that Reading we just listened to). Nothing – including suicide.
If he’d been a predator, they’d’ve protected him.
Yes, the quote is FTA.
Read the homily posted below. Where did he call him a sinner?
BTW, he was a sinner, that isn't an exclusive club.
There are really problems on both sides here. The Church has abdicated and/or forfeited its teaching authority, so whenever some poor priest who didn’t get the memo tries to do his job, everyone freaks out. The other problem is with the laity who don’t really want a church or even Christianity but rather just therapeutic deism. “God loves everyone and wants everyone to be happy and nice and that’s about it.”
Seems like a solid piece of work.
Far more appropriate than “celebrating” the deceased suicide’s life.
If this is not acceptable in the Catholic Church, what are they?
If you have a Catholic funeral, you should expect to hear Catholic teaching from a Catholic Priest.
I understand your point, but could you see yourself acting as this priest did under those circumstances? I could never do that to such a grieving couple especially not at a crowded event such as that. Their other four children were there too.
Some people simply wish for a ceremonial presence that the priest can provide, vs a seminar or symposium on life and death. They want the whole experience to be over, with no last minute surprises or disturbing shocks.
Yet and still, I know that many would agree with your point.
Very true.
I read the sermon.
My guess is that the parents simply did not like the fact that the priest repeatedly mentioned or inferred that their son committed suicide. If my own child were to commit suicide, would I want that act emphasized in any funeral sermon - or would I rather want to hear how that child was a blessing? I think the latter.
For any of us: do our surviving loved-ones want our sins (past/present/future) paraded in funeral sermons. I think not.
Correcto!
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