Justice is different then vengeance. Justice can be measured and coolly meted out. Vengeance burns and boils. It eats away at you, stealing the joy, the calm and the peace that is suppose to be in your heart as a child of God.
God does not want you hurt. ---
We also have to remember that God is not just a bigger version of us. God is categorically different. Since He is the Author of life, he can withdraw life.
We are made in His image. He is not made in ours.
Thank you, I think that helps a little. It is something I have struggled with and many people have told me to let go of things but I have a really hard time no matter how many nuns tried to beat it out of me.