Posted on 03/10/2014 8:37:20 AM PDT by SeekAndFind
Divorced Christians will be encouraged by Pope Francis's reminder that the church should be a place of healing after a failed marriage.
Pope Francis is giving hope to another group historically marginalized by the church. During a recent morning Mass, he made news when he said the divorced should be "accompanied," not "condemned.”
This message will be balm to many divorced Christians—Catholic or not—who have had fellow believers heap shame and judgment on top of the pain that accompanies the loss of a marriage. It’s also a reminder that while the church has caused plenty of pain, it is meant to be a place of incredible healing.
When I was going through my own divorce, I found a church that practiced what the Pope is preaching. There, I met a woman I’ll call Amanda, who became a dear friend. Her story contrasts the two approaches to divorce in the church that Pope Francis highlighted.
(Excerpt) Read more at thedailybeast.com ...
Christian and Catholic love and support in action. God Bless Pope Francis.
The Catholic rules are hard for the average American to follow, they start seeming like the Pharasitic law.
Before I got married...I was compassionate to several divorcees.
I am divorce-remarried.
Nevertheless, Jesus said what He said. The only valid divorce is for fornication, but the RCC does not accept that as valid, for divorce-remarriage. Neither do the Mennonites.
Pharasitic Laws are hard (nay impossible) for ANYONE to follow
Protestants need to follow this advice as well.
Including widowed, divorced and separated individuals. Find one in your area. Great healing weekend.
I was a member of the local team for several years and can vouch for the healing that takes place.
I don’t think he is disputing the theology of divorce. He is saying that divorced people in the church should not be treated disdainfully simply because they are divorced, since others do not really know what happened.
I can only speak for our family, where several of the long-married women believe they are morally superior to some of the divorced people. Pain in the butt and hurts the relationships between others, like grown siblings, elder care or nieces and nephews.
That said, the issue of remarriage for Christians is very complicated. Some can do it in good conscience because of the circumstances of the divorce; others not.
This may benefit from a close examination of the words of Jesus as recorded in the Gospels.
In Matthew, Mark, and Luke, Jesus rules out divorce-remarriage. But only in Matthew does he say, "Except in the case of porneia,.
Naturally, there's been lots of discussion about the meaning of "porneia," which seems to be a rather broad but vague Greek word meaning sexual unlawfulness of some kind: in various places it's used to mean consorting with prostitutes, fornication, marriage within prohibited degrees of consanguinity, adultery, perversion, general indecency, etc.
The Catholic Church takes "except in the case of porneia" to mean "except in the case of an unlawful marriage" --- that is, unless the first marriage was in fact unlawful for some reason.
I can't undertake to contribute to an ongoing discussion of the word "porneia," but I'd be interested in others who know Koine Greek to perhaps make a contribution.
Actually, there is nothing that says that directly, I think the term used was “unlawful”. Protestants have interpreted this to mean adultery or have in their translations used the word adultery where Catholic translations use the word unlawful. The Catholic position takes unlawful to mean forbidden marriages, i.e. man and woman of close blood relationship or legal relationship. These were viewed as incest [porneia]. So if that is the interpretation, then lawful marriages vs. unlawful marriages is the key. For Lawful marriages, the statements by Jesus in Matthew 19 take on a different meaning than what Protestants argue.
The only exception clause is found in Mt. 19:9 but other passages on marriage and divorce are found in the NT [Mk 10:11-12; Luke 16:18; 1 Cor 7:10-11] which support the Catholic position as it is taught. The Orthodox take a slightly different view than the Catholic one [so there are even some slight variations on this topic between the Catholic and the Orthodox, although not as different as it is between the Catholic and Protestant positions] so this teaching while binding to the degree that it is currently taught, has never been taught definitively to the degree of some things although the Council of Trent came pretty close by putting it into the Canons of that council.
I’m bombarded daily by requests for compassion - from the local news and their story about the single-mom with 3 kids to take care of, to the grocery store clerk who wants the change in my pocket for whatever cause, to the Pope who wants my compassion for divorced people.
Its a highly over-used word.
Especially because it is in the Bible.
Jesus came into the district of Judea and across the Jordan.
Again crowds gathered around him and, as was his custom,
he again taught them.
The Pharisees approached him and asked,
“Is it lawful for a husband to divorce his wife?”
They were testing him.
He said to them in reply, “What did Moses command you?”
They replied,
“Moses permitted a husband to write a bill of divorce
and dismiss her.”
But Jesus told them,
“Because of the hardness of your hearts
he wrote you this commandment.
But from the beginning of creation, God made them male and female.
For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother
and be joined to his wife,
and the two shall become one flesh.
So they are no longer two but one flesh.
Therefore what God has joined together,
no human being must separate.”
In the house the disciples again questioned Jesus about this.
He said to them,
“Whoever divorces his wife and marries another
commits adultery against her;
and if she divorces her husband and marries another,
she commits adultery.”
The Church’s position on Communion for the illicitly-remarried is not going to change.
All this propaganda is similar to the campaign carried on for several years before Paul VI finally issued Humanae Vitae. People were encouraged, even in the Confessional, to go ahead and use The Pill, because “the Pope is going to change the teaching.”
Ok. I think real compassion, though, would be more careful counseling of engaged couples and screening. If one or both are selfish or lukewarm about faith, loyalty, sacrifice, going into the marriage, or if they are looking at their intended spouse through rose-colored glasses, a wakeup call beforehand would be more compassionate than “compassion” afterwards.
Also, justice and mercy must go together. If there is compassion for the single parent, mustn’t there also be a culture that is not afraid to call the parents out for her or his neglect and selfishness? If there is no stigma for bad behavior, there will be more of it. And it’s not always the parent with custody who is the “victim”.
I don’t think he is disputing the theology of divorce. He is saying that divorced people in the church should not be treated disdainfully simply because they are divorced, since others do not really know what happened.Agreed. I've seen "Christians" play the moral superiority card over such things. And I've seen pastors and churches act like they did with that woman Amanda in the article, even when the woman is coming into church and public with bruises and black eyes all over. But oh no, can't countenance divorce, not even when the husband's fornicating and drinking and such right in front of your eyes. I don't truck with that. Divorce shouldn't be the first solution or even considered unless absolutely necessary, but you sometimes need it. And it ain't right to look down on those who did it - you might be in that position yourself one day.
Divorce is devastating to people and in many cases, innocent children suffer. People must know the person they marry very well before committing their lives to them---and they must know and be honest about themselves.
That takes a level of maturity for both of them, but we can't get through to everyone in the world about that!.
Throughout my life I've known divorced men and women. Some never married again and some did. I find it hard to believe that someone should be destined to be alone, and maybe lonely, because their marriage failed---maybe through no fault of their own.
Jeremiah 3:8 And I saw, when for all the causes whereby backsliding Israel committed adultery I had put her away, and given her a bill of D I V O R C E; yet her treacherous sister Judah feared not, but went and played the harlot also.
It is a far greater sin to commit spiritual adultery than to commit flesh adultery.
Wonder now, are ‘we’ suppose to ‘forgive’ the Heavenly Father for being a divorcee... Wonder what price had to be paid for the forgiveness of this sin? These are rhetorical questions. God in Christ forgives sin, not a church or a priest/preacher. Maybe the two involved in the divorce can eventually forgive themselves and each other.
No, I have never been divorced.
It's an excellent requirement. Unfortunately one or both of the candidates may not be wholly truthful. And, at the time, they may believe what they are saying!
If, at some point after, they stray from their vows, who could have known this would happen? Then, what recourse does their spouse have. It's very sad for many people. I don't have any answer. My husband and I recently celebrated our 53rd wedding anniversary. Guess we've been lucky.
Well, even with imperfect preparation and fallible humans involved, a whole lot of marriages actually do form up reasonably well, and the couple grows together instead of apart. In light of that, it is easy to see God’s hand in the design of the institution, and His Grace in the lives of many couples.
Some counseling and screening would help, in some cases. Heartfelt prayer would no doubt help in all cases.
Congrats on your long marriage IIntense.
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